Would YOU ever have a homebirth?

wannabeL&D73 · Sep 18, 2005

Sorry!!!!!!!!! When I have a child I want to be medicated to the point where I don't remember a thing.....wake me when it is over if possible.....why have pain if there are measures to prevent it. I haven't had the pleasure of giving birth yet, but I am actually even thinking of having a scheduled c section when it is my time, and yeah I know it is major ab, surgery (I am graduating nursing school in December) but the thought of regular labor scares the hell out of me, it always did and now that I have learned more than any regular person would ever want to know I am a million times more scared!!!!!!!! I would rather just have a scheduled time that I know I am going to have my child at this time, I will be fully medicated, blah, blah, blah......I think in the future we will be seeing a lot more of this.....any thoughts? Does anyone agree, disagree?

I just have to say that from my personal experience, I would be so sad to have been "medicated to the point where I don't remember a thing." I did have an epidural, but giving birth to my daughter, even though it was an extrememly difficult pg, and we were scared to death because she was a 32-weeker, was the most amazing experience and brought my husband and I so much closer to each other. I absolutely treasure the memory. And while I can say that a healthy baby is truly the most important thing, my c-section just wasn't the same as a lady partsl delivery. It would really be a shame to deprive yourself of that opportunity. Yes, labor is scary, but it is also amazing and beautiful. Just try to keep an open mind and be flexible.

Shannon

ps if you are interested there is a thread about scheduled c-sections for convenience somewhere on this forum.

dkaykaymom · Sep 18, 2005

I have three children. The first was a hospital birth, the second was a homebirth with a midwife (and it was my husband's idea). After the first homebirth I was determined it would be my last, and with my third child I went to a hospital and had an epidural and that was fine and dandy.
Why anyone would want to do a homebirth vountarily is beyond me.

I had my first baby in hospital setting 29 years ago. I had come home from overseas when I was 8 months pregnant and had a difficult time finding a Dr. who would accept me at such a late date. The first time I saw the OB, I told my mother he wasn't very pleasant. The second time I saw him, I told my mother that because he had scrubs on, he had probably been up all night delivering babies, which was why he seemed tired and short with me. The third time I saw him, I told my mother I didn't like him and wanted another Dr. It was a disaster from when my water broke at 8:00 am. I called the Drs office to let them know, and that since I wasn't having contractions, I'd probably show up at the hospital later in the day in labor. The ?receptionist? started screaming at me that I had to go into the hospital IMMEDIATELY!!!! No explanation, just kept screaming that I HAD TO GET TO THE HOSPITAL. I didn't know why, and by the time I arrived, I was pretty upset and angry. The OB nurse said she needed to check to see if my water had REALLY broken, and if it didn't, I could go home. When the litmus paper was positive she put me on a gurney just inside the double entry doors to the L/D unit, stating that their rooms were full, and when became available, it was mine. That was around 0900. My mother was with me and they allowed her to sit near my gurney. Labor started around noon and I quickly discovered what back labor was. (So did my mother, who rubbed my back almost continuously for 12 hours!) I labored on that gurney where everyone who came in to the unit could see me. I was not checked a single time until they decided to move me to the delivery room around 1930 that evening. Keep in mind, I'm still on the gurney out in the unit. (I never did find out why I never got routed to a labor room!) Just before they moved me to a delivery room, the nurses tried to start the obligatory IV; and tried and tried and tried. Then they called an ICU nurse to try - unsuccessfully; then the ER nurse - unsuccessfully. My mother tells this part of the story (I was busy, I didn't keep track) that she counted a total of 23 sticks before she said "No more" and they reluctantly took me to the delivery room. She asked to go with me and was denied. (And after all that back rubbing she did for me!) The one nurse in the unit helped me get settled. She also removed my glasses. When I explained that I can see my hand in front of my face without my glasses, her response was to recite the "rules" of the delivery room. She then left me by myself with instructions to push with each contraction. Yes, by myself. I hadn't even seen my Dr. yet. Every few minutes she'd stick her head in the door and tell me to push. This went on for almost an hour. I was so tired of pushing that I actually slept through those contractions! Finally, Dr. arrived, settled himself to deliver baby, never said one word to me. Nurse said you have to push and Dr. finally made a disgusted sound and told nurse to push on belly to help. Finally 10 lb baby born. When I heard him cry I asked if it was a boy and neither of them answered. I panicked. I asked again if it was a body and Dr.s response was quote "Yes it is, goddammit, now just up and let me do my job." Nurse in meantime took baby out of room without showing him to me, returned immediately and without a word attempted to put an oxygen mask on me. I asked what it was and Dr.s response was - quote - "It's oxygen." I said what did I need oxygen for, and his response was to "throw it down." Which I promptly did. Now at this point, Dr. and I are only ones in room and he's busy doing what OB Drs. do immediately after a baby is born. But after 30 minutes of job I said, "When can I see the baby?" He response was - quote - when I get done here." He got done, took off his gloves and left the room, saying not another word. Now I didn't know what to do. I'm in a set of stirrups, open to the world, in the the delivery room by myself, not knowing where the nurse was, wondering if I should get down off the table myself and clean myself up. . . .thankfully Nurse returned and did her job to get me to my post partum bed. That was exactly 10:00 pm. I immediately ask to see the baby and they refused, explaining their protocol of VS and fundus checks. At 11:00 pm I asked for the baby again. and the refused, stating that the baby was getting measured and weighed and being cleaned up. (Keep in mind that baby was born at 9:03 pm). At 11:30 pm when I asked to see the baby, they refused, stating that they were in the middle of shift change. At midnight, I informed them that if I didn't get to see my baby IMMEDIATELY, I would be removing him from the nursery and we would be going home IMMEDIATELY THEREAFTER. I got to see the baby. At 5:00 am the following morning my Dr. comes in to see me. I ask when can I go home and his response was - again a quote - "You're not sick. Go home whenever you want." I then told the nurse to bring me my baby because I was going home. She refused, stating the pediatrician had not examined him yet. I told the nurse I was leaving at 7:00 am and that baby was going with me. So she needed to do whatever was required to meet my deadline. She did.

So, I wait 7 years to have another baby (yes, part of reason was the aforementioned experience). However, now I'm an RN and met a most wonderful midwife. We bacame friends. Of course all my nurse friends thought that I was completely out of my mind when I decided to have a home birth. However, my midwife stated that she had done over 900 births prior to mine and she had only one so-called medical emergency. That's not say that she didn't transport her share of laboring moms to the hospital and that's not to say that she didn't transfer prenatal care over to Drs. when she felt a home birth would not be safe. Hey, I thought those were pretty good odds.

The experience was magnificent. During labor, I helped wash dishes and my mom, husband, and midwife sat with me playing cards. I wanted my son to be there for the birth and he was included in the preparation. Actually, we used his bed as the birthing bed. (For those of you speaking about the mess. No mess! We used a shower curtain and stragetically placed chux. Afterwards, we rolled everything up in the curtain and put it in the trash.) The only minor complication to her birth was the fact that I pushed for 4 hours before midwife decided to transport me. She put me on my side with oxygen, packed up her supplies while husband packed a quick bag for baby and me. Just before she wanted to get me into her car, she chedked me again, shouted, "We're going to have this baby NOW!" And promptly did. She was 9 lb 14 oz. Son and Grandma had that baby in three different outfits in her first hour! An hour after she was born, I took a shower, got dressed, got settled in my recliner and took over the baby.

Why would anyone want to do a home birth? That's why!

ptadvocate81 · Sep 18, 2005

I am currently in OB and clinicals and I am just a little paranoid about what all can go wrong and how quickly it can occur. I want to be in a modern hospital with the latest advances in technology so that they can help myself and baby if an emergency occurs. I know that women have done it naturally for millions of years, but this is one women who will be taking full advantage of the technology God has allowed us to discover... I am NOT against homebirths at all, I think that they are amazing, just not for me...

SeekingNur · Sep 18, 2005

I miscarried my first pregnancy, I had a midwife take care of me then. I went on to deliver two children at home with midwives and I am now 30 weeks pregnant with #3 and planning a homebirth. I wouldn't have it any other way.

stefanitenzi · Sep 18, 2005

I guess you are right. I didn't think of it that way.

I just have to say that from my personal experience, I would be so sad to have been "medicated to the point where I don't remember a thing." I did have an epidural, but giving birth to my daughter, even though it was an extrememly difficult pg, and we were scared to death because she was a 32-weeker, was the most amazing experience and brought my husband and I so much closer to each other. I absolutely treasure the memory. And while I can say that a healthy baby is truly the most important thing, my c-section just wasn't the same as a lady partsl delivery. It would really be a shame to deprive yourself of that opportunity. Yes, labor is scary, but it is also amazing and beautiful. Just try to keep an open mind and be flexible.
Shannon
ps if you are interested there is a thread about scheduled c-sections for convenience somewhere on this forum.

allnurses Guide · Sep 18, 2005

Wow - I feel like slapping your doctor and nurses from 29 years ago. :angryfire

I'm an OB nurse in a hospital and I completely respect your decision to try a homebirth.

However, I have to say that the deliveries I am involved in would never end up like your first one.

30 years ago things were so different. Even 22 years ago when I had my first son - I stayed 3 days in the hospital for a normal vag delivery (with an enema, complete shave, episotomy). I didn't see my son alot - he spent most of the time in the nursery and I was young and naive and intimidated so didn't know any other way. 2nd son 2 years later in a small hospital was 180 degrees different and better.

A friend of mine delivered 30 years ago and couldn't have visitors on post-partum so they made her get up oob and walk down to the glass doors with the baby so we could talk through the doors. (forgive me if I told this story earlier on this thread - this is a long thread).

Congratulations for taking control!! steph

I had my first baby in hospital setting 29 years ago. I had come home from overseas when I was 8 months pregnant and had a difficult time finding a Dr. who would accept me at such a late date. The first time I saw the OB, I told my mother he wasn't very pleasant. The second time I saw him, I told my mother that because he had scrubs on, he had probably been up all night delivering babies, which was why he seemed tired and short with me. The third time I saw him, I told my mother I didn't like him and wanted another Dr. It was a disaster from when my water broke at 8:00 am. I called the Drs office to let them know, and that since I wasn't having contractions, I'd probably show up at the hospital later in the day in labor. The ?receptionist? started screaming at me that I had to go into the hospital IMMEDIATELY!!!! No explanation, just kept screaming that I HAD TO GET TO THE HOSPITAL. I didn't know why, and by the time I arrived, I was pretty upset and angry. The OB nurse said she needed to check to see if my water had REALLY broken, and if it didn't, I could go home. When the litmus paper was positive she put me on a gurney just inside the double entry doors to the L/D unit, stating that their rooms were full, and when became available, it was mine. That was around 0900. My mother was with me and they allowed her to sit near my gurney. Labor started around noon and I quickly discovered what back labor was. (So did my mother, who rubbed my back almost continuously for 12 hours!) I labored on that gurney where everyone who came in to the unit could see me. I was not checked a single time until they decided to move me to the delivery room around 1930 that evening. Keep in mind, I'm still on the gurney out in the unit. (I never did find out why I never got routed to a labor room!) Just before they moved me to a delivery room, the nurses tried to start the obligatory IV; and tried and tried and tried. Then they called an ICU nurse to try - unsuccessfully; then the ER nurse - unsuccessfully. My mother tells this part of the story (I was busy, I didn't keep track) that she counted a total of 23 sticks before she said "No more" and they reluctantly took me to the delivery room. She asked to go with me and was denied. (And after all that back rubbing she did for me!) The one nurse in the unit helped me get settled. She also removed my glasses. When I explained that I can see my hand in front of my face without my glasses, her response was to recite the "rules" of the delivery room. She then left me by myself with instructions to push with each contraction. Yes, by myself. I hadn't even seen my Dr. yet. Every few minutes she'd stick her head in the door and tell me to push. This went on for almost an hour. I was so tired of pushing that I actually slept through those contractions! Finally, Dr. arrived, settled himself to deliver baby, never said one word to me. Nurse said you have to push and Dr. finally made a disgusted sound and told nurse to push on belly to help. Finally 10 lb baby born. When I heard him cry I asked if it was a boy and neither of them answered. I panicked. I asked again if it was a body and Dr.s response was quote "Yes it is, goddammit, now just up and let me do my job." Nurse in meantime took baby out of room without showing him to me, returned immediately and without a word attempted to put an oxygen mask on me. I asked what it was and Dr.s response was - quote - "It's oxygen." I said what did I need oxygen for, and his response was to "throw it down." Which I promptly did. Now at this point, Dr. and I are only ones in room and he's busy doing what OB Drs. do immediately after a baby is born. But after 30 minutes of job I said, "When can I see the baby?" He response was - quote - when I get done here." He got done, took off his gloves and left the room, saying not another word. Now I didn't know what to do. I'm in a set of stirrups, open to the world, in the the delivery room by myself, not knowing where the nurse was, wondering if I should get down off the table myself and clean myself up. . . .thankfully Nurse returned and did her job to get me to my post partum bed. That was exactly 10:00 pm. I immediately ask to see the baby and they refused, explaining their protocol of VS and fundus checks. At 11:00 pm I asked for the baby again. and the refused, stating that the baby was getting measured and weighed and being cleaned up. (Keep in mind that baby was born at 9:03 pm). At 11:30 pm when I asked to see the baby, they refused, stating that they were in the middle of shift change. At midnight, I informed them that if I didn't get to see my baby IMMEDIATELY, I would be removing him from the nursery and we would be going home IMMEDIATELY THEREAFTER. I got to see the baby. At 5:00 am the following morning my Dr. comes in to see me. I ask when can I go home and his response was - again a quote - "You're not sick. Go home whenever you want." I then told the nurse to bring me my baby because I was going home. She refused, stating the pediatrician had not examined him yet. I told the nurse I was leaving at 7:00 am and that baby was going with me. So she needed to do whatever was required to meet my deadline. She did.
So, I wait 7 years to have another baby (yes, part of reason was the aforementioned experience). However, now I'm an RN and met a most wonderful midwife. We bacame friends. Of course all my nurse friends thought that I was completely out of my mind when I decided to have a home birth. However, my midwife stated that she had done over 900 births prior to mine and she had only one so-called medical emergency. That's not say that she didn't transport her share of laboring moms to the hospital and that's not to say that she didn't transfer prenatal care over to Drs. when she felt a home birth would not be safe. Hey, I thought those were pretty good odds.
The experience was magnificent. During labor, I helped wash dishes and my mom, husband, and midwife sat with me playing cards. I wanted my son to be there for the birth and he was included in the preparation. Actually, we used his bed as the birthing bed. (For those of you speaking about the mess. No mess! We used a shower curtain and stragetically placed chux. Afterwards, we rolled everything up in the curtain and put it in the trash.) The only minor complication to her birth was the fact that I pushed for 4 hours before midwife decided to transport me. She put me on my side with oxygen, packed up her supplies while husband packed a quick bag for baby and me. Just before she wanted to get me into her car, she chedked me again, shouted, "We're going to have this baby NOW!" And promptly did. She was 9 lb 14 oz. Son and Grandma had that baby in three different outfits in her first hour! An hour after she was born, I took a shower, got dressed, got settled in my recliner and took over the baby.
Why would anyone want to do a home birth? That's why!

nancimarie · Sep 19, 2005

Just a thought, but you could be with a midwife in a birthing center that was attached to a hospital, that's what I would do.....

Sorry if this topic has been done to death. I've been working since June in OB, focusing mainly on L&D. I have two children of my own, the first one was a fast and uneventful hospital birth, the second was a homebirth (acynclitic and OP, so labor was VERY long and difficult - if I had been in a hospital, I'm pretty sure I would have been sectioned, but all turned out well in the end).
I'm facing the prospect of perhaps having one more in a couple years. I had previously thought that any other children would also be born at home. But now that I've been working in L&D and getting a glimpse of all the potential emergencies and behind-the-scenes things that could go wrong, I'm seriously questioning the safety of homebirth. I guess you could say I'm having a crisis of faith that birth is a natural process that doesn't HAVE to be managed in order to have a good outcome.
Anyway, I was just wondering if other L&D nurses, knowing what they know, would ever opt for a homebirth for their own.

Mrs.S · Sep 19, 2005

If I could find a midwife who I was comfortable with I would totally do it!

I had two really nice hospital deliveries with a CNM, no pain meds or interventions or anything. The thing that really stunk was having to leave my nice comfortable nest at home, get in the car and drive across town to deliver. With baby #2 I was 8 cm when I arrived at the hospital and 8 cm an hour & a half later; my labor totally stalled out and it sucked. I chalk it up to just the stress of going there.

wetdiaperengineer · Sep 21, 2005

Forgive me if I'm redundant in a lot of information previously posted. This is my first post.

I would like to offer the thought and hope that some might consider empowering themselves within the hospital setting.

I have read many times over where the hospital was basically laying in wait for the mom to come in and have many interventions done that she wasn't wanting/ready for/ educated about. I personally think that is one of the SADDEST parts of hospital delivery, as I know it does happen.

I have worked in many hospitals all over the county; several as staff nurse (3) and many as a traveling nurse in my single days.

I can't say that I have been totally innocent of implementing these interventions early in my career, before I knew the options and the positive effects of empowering a laboring woman and her family.

I do however, think that it is more of a "Provider issue" than a hospital issue at this point in time.

Many Doctors (even CNM's in certain practices) advocate, even mandate the pit/epidural/lithotomy delivery etc. And, for MANY patients that is exactly what they want; someone to take control, alleviate as much pain as possible through whatever means and direct her each step of the way.

For MANY other patients, they enjoy the control of her own labor, using a doula, birthing plan and homebrought assistive devices (ie: birthing balls, etc)

The point that I want to make is that WHATEVER way that mom wants to have her baby is the BEST way for her!

I personally love to review a birth plan, usually written, but many times devised as we go. (all women have some concept in thier minds of how they would like things to go). I start with that! I TALK with the patient about her options, including laboring out of bed, walking, in the jacuzzi, shower etc.

Yes, there are times that we are required to do some things that aren't required at a home birth. Monitoring during pitocin infusion comes to mind. This is where compromise comes in. We are fortunate at our hospital to be able to monitor the patient on a telemetry unit that allows free movement (including the jacuzzi) to our patients. We have birthing balls/ squatting bars/ mirrors and many other nurse made assistive devices (hot water bottles covered with a warm towel for the back labor).

I LOVE to have a family that remembers thier labor positively. I LOVE to hug and be a part of thier birthday. I believe that is one of the best gifts God gave me in my life, to be able to do that.

I know this is long, but thanks if you have read this far..

One of my favorite memories of laboring a lady was one with a doula. The doula and the patient had devised a pain control method... They brought five small stuffed bunnies (kinda like beenie babies). The woman when she was ready to give up and get an epidural would throw a bunny at her doula. LOL!

If she used all five, the doula was to shut up and let her get her epidural. I absolutely LOVED that one. The woman used three bunnies and had a beautiful pain med free birth, as she had planned and wanted.

My Advice;

Seek out a provider WILLING to allow this empowerment. Be sure to allow to that provider that you DO trust him/her to intervene with explanation as necessary. Go with your GUT feeling with that provider...will he/she honor your wishes? They ARE out there, many of them. For those that want the security of a hospital delivery "in case" THAT is my heartfelt advice.

RNnL&D · Sep 22, 2005

:rotfl: Ok, why is it still in the freezer? My husband was in charge of burying the placenta after my homebirth. Apparently he didn't dig the hole deep enough because our dog dug it back up! :chuckle He made sure that he made it deep enough the second time around! :rotfl:

I plan to plant it on his six month birthday, which is next week. :crying2:

I'm hoping it's not still in the freezer when he is 4. :rotfl:

RNnL&D · Sep 22, 2005

I'm the one who mentioned the mess . . . .and I wouldn't want to make someone else do it - that is my point :imbar - that would be my problem. I can't even hire a housekeeper - how in the world would I make someone clean up my room after I delivered a baby? It is a very messy event - just made for a hospital room. :)

But someone has to clean up your hospital room, no?

As to the rest, I still wouldn't want to be at home. Our delivery room is set up like a bedroom . . but all the necessary emergency stuff is handy. And our docs are not big on intervening . . . so we try to do the homebirth experience if we can.
steph

Not to argue specifics here, but I think you mean, we try to make it a home like environment (adding the delivery table, stabilette, external monitor, etc sitting next to the bed). A homebirth experience, can only occur in a home, IMO. :wink2:

RNnL&D · Sep 22, 2005

Peg-
I think that some of the anger home birthers feel comes from disappointment (which there is absolutely NOTHING you can do about other than validate it!) and some of it comes from the assumtion that hospitals and medical staff look down on home birthers, find them irresponsible, ignorant, etc.

:yeahthat: Exactly.

We had a Mom come in recently by squad who delivered at home, accidently, when one of the other nurses mentioned that I had delivered at home and they were mad because I didn't bother to come in and show off the baby, she asked if she had that option. The EMT who was still sitting there filling out paperwork, asked what would they had done if she had refused. Uh, have her sign the same refused tx form you give anyone else? He said, that he wasn't comfortable with that, and he would have called the police and had her arrested if she refused to come in. Huh??? :angryfire

Just one of the examples of how women are disempowered to make their own birth choices.