The rules of life

  1. Sometimes we need to remember WHAT the Rules of life really are.

    1. Never give yourself a haircut after three alcoholic beverages
    of any kind.

    2. You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape.
    If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40.
    If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape.

    3. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital
    relationship are "I apologize" and "You are right".

    4. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

    5. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately.
    It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm.

    6. The only really good advice that your mother ever gave you
    was: "Go! You might meet somebody!"

    7. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her
    believe them.

    8. Learn to pick your battles. Ask yourself,
    Will this matter one year from now?
    How about one month?
    One week?
    One day?

    9. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.

    10. If you woke up breathing, congratulations!
    You have another chance!

    11. Living well really is the best revenge.
    Being miserable because of a bad or former relationship just
    might mean that the other person was right about you.

    12. Work is good, but it's not that important.

    13. And finally, be really nice to your friends and family.
    You never know when you are going to need them to empty your
    bedpan.



    God Bless
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  2. 4 Comments

  3. by   hypnotic_nurse
    I've got #9 down pat!!!!
  4. by   RNIAM
    That is so funny!
  5. by   Audreyfay
    Another one I've learned by experience: Always be sure to look at the hair cut, style and color of the hair stylist you are going to for the first time. You undoubtedly will come out looking like them!

    One time I went in to get a short haircut. For the first time in my life I went to a male stylist. I left looking just like him, but I was happy with it!
  6. by   alexsb1116
    Food 4 thought:
    If you go inside a salon/barber shop and find two hair stylists/barbers, one with a bad hair cut and one with a great hair cut. Have your hair done by the one with the bad hair cut.

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