Share your funniest patient stories... - page 87

by trvlnRN

549,928 Views | 912 Comments

:lol2: We all have lots of stories to tell. I thought it would be fun if we shared a few of our funniest patient stories with each other. I keep remembering to a particular incident a few years back. It wasn't even my... Read More


  1. 5
    Had a lovely patient who was unfortunately suffering with a bout of diarrhoea, and naturally he was becoming a little raw in the rear, he liked to listen to music most days, well ever cleaned some one up while listening to Johnny Cash's Ring of Fire, the patient, my colleague and I where in hysterics
    Last edit by janetteknits on Jan 30, '13 : Reason: Spelling
    Leonca, maelstrom143, Vespertinas, and 2 others like this.
  2. 0
    Quote from terhay
    I had a sweet 88 yo woman in ER with a 3rd degree heart block. I had to tell her we were admitting her for a pacemaker insertion. She was terribly upset! She said, "But I HAVE TO see my husband! I go to the nursing hoime every single day to visit." Thinking her husband was probably 90, I asked how old he was thnking I would justify her stay with "he'll understand". She winked at me and proudly said, "He is 73. I just LOVE those young stud-muffins!" I had to laugh...wasn't expecting that AT ALL.
    How totally cool
  3. 1
    I had a patient pass away today... he was hospice. It went very smoothly.
    ...and then...

    The mortician was picking up the body when his cell went off. Guess what his ringtone was?
    Dead man's party.
    0.0

    I was just thinking that I would love that if I were the deceased.
    maelstrom143 likes this.
  4. 2
    Quote from Stephanie in FL
    When I worked on med-surg, one of my co-workers related this story. We worked 11-7 on a renal unit. Around 6 am we weighed the ESRD pts who were not scheduled for dialysis that day. My co-worker goes to weigh one pt. she is not familiar with. He is lying in bed under the blankets. She tells him to "hop on the scale". He sits up and she learns he only has one leg! He literally "hops on the scale". She was embarrassed!

    Stephanie RN CDE

    I almost woke my son up from laughing!
    sharpeimom and Poopsiebublnose like this.
  5. 0
    Quote from ValerieAnn21486

    Oh my, I dont think I could have held my laugh back! Good story thanks for sharing!
    Huge belly laugh with eyes tearing up!
  6. 1
    One time had a blind patient (both glass eyes) that I was tucking in bed for the night. I asked him "do you want me to leave the light dimmer on or do you like it completely dark?" He replies "well whatever is convinient for you because its always dark to me." Whoops... just a habbit I guess
    maelstrom143 likes this.
  7. 3
    When I first started working as a nurse I was reading through the discharge summary after just admitting a double BKA (Below knee amputation) Patient, when I had to do a double take. The MD had written that there were no complications post procedure and that the patient "has been ambulating up and down the hallways without issue." That got added to the book on how not to document! :-P
  8. 1
    This happened to me yesterday. I had a patient who was bought in by a friend because he was acting confused, and he just relapsed after being released from a treatment center. He was going to be admitted to the hospital for confusion and intoxication. The patient, like many alcoholics that frequent the ED, wanted me to make him a sandwich. Like there's bread, cold cuts, lettuce, tomatoes and mayo in the ED. All we have are crackers, and I gave him crackers. I told him we don't have sandwiches down here, and that he would get a sandwich once he gets up to his hospital room, which would happen after the attending physician sees him in the ED and writes admitting orders.

    While I was attending to a new patient, the patient comes out of the room and asks a doctor sitting at his station which room he was going to. The doctor actually told him the room number of where he was going to. What the hell? After that, the patient changes into the clothes he was wearing when he came in, and walks out of the ED. When I came out of my other patient's room, I found his room was empty. Naturally, I'm freaking out because I lost him. He could have been outside wandering aimlessly, I don't know. And he still had his IV in; not good :O I go to security to look at camera footage, tracking where he might have run off to. Camera footage shows when he left, but not much else. Then, the unit secretary comes into the security office telling me that the charge nurse of the floor he was to be admitted to is on the phone for me. Turns out, the patient went up to the floor and asked where his room was. And of course, he asked for something to eat.

    Needless to say this is the first time I've ever had a patient take himself to his own room.
    maelstrom143 likes this.
  9. 0
    Quote from whichone'spink
    This happened to me yesterday. I had a patient who was bought in by a friend because he was acting confused, and he just relapsed after being released from a treatment center. He was going to be admitted to the hospital for confusion and intoxication. The patient, like many alcoholics that frequent the ED, wanted me to make him a sandwich. Like there's bread, cold cuts, lettuce, tomatoes and mayo in the ED. All we have are crackers, and I gave him crackers. I told him we don't have sandwiches down here, and that he would get a sandwich once he gets up to his hospital room, which would happen after the attending physician sees him in the ED and writes admitting orders.

    While I was attending to a new patient, the patient comes out of the room and asks a doctor sitting at his station which room he was going to. The doctor actually told him the room number of where he was going to. What the hell? After that, the patient changes into the clothes he was wearing when he came in, and walks out of the ED. When I came out of my other patient's room, I found his room was empty. Naturally, I'm freaking out because I lost him. He could have been outside wandering aimlessly, I don't know. And he still had his IV in; not good :O I go to security to look at camera footage, tracking where he might have run off to. Camera footage shows when he left, but not much else. Then, the unit secretary comes into the security office telling me that the charge nurse of the floor he was to be admitted to is on the phone for me. Turns out, the patient went up to the floor and asked where his room was. And of course, he asked for something to eat.

    Needless to say this is the first time I've ever had a patient take himself to his own room.
    Wow!! I hope there wasn't a patient in that room awaiting discharge or something haha.
  10. 4
    I had a man in his 80s that I had prior to OHS. Sweetest husand/wife combo ever. I adored them. Everyone on our unit did...we spoiled him!! When I heard surgery went well and he would becoming back to us,we all fought over him (in a nice way). I won because I used to "continuity of care" card and I had him prior. So ICU is bringing him down to us. Now picture: an OHS patient, hair all out of wack, tall, skinny man. HUGE thick glasses. Wife trailing behind slowly with her walker. I meet them in the hallway. We are all greeted with a smile and a wave. First thing he says is "THEY DIDNT KILL ME!" (say that loud enough?) Anyway. I go up to him and I say (name changed) "George! You sure look good for just having surgery. If it wasn't for the tubes and the nurses behind you I couldn't even tell." He laughed and replied...."you think I look good now little lady? Just you wait until I get my teeth in." And ended it with a wink. Love it
    AmyRN303, Leonca, maelstrom143, and 1 other like this.


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