Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart? - page 3

To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply Darwin Consult and was signed by the... Read More

  1. by   stephi57
    not really an order but among my favorites are the ultrasound reports that come to us on L&D with the box beside "pt pregnant" checked NO while the report reads "single viable IUP...." (intrauterine pregnancy for y'all non OB's). Who does the quality control?
  2. by   shannonRN
    great stories! my story isn't of an actual order written in the chart but how the unit secretary put it in the computer. i found it when i went to do our midnight lines. the doctor wrote an order to strain urine. the secretary put in gram stain of urine. lab called the nurse to clarify and the nurse said, "that is what the doctor ordered" and lab tried to do a gram stain on urine?! i was there for an evening midnight double and overheard the nurse's side of the conversation. i couldn't believe that she didn't think to look at the chart.
  3. by   h vigliotti
    i have seen orders like that! a can of beer or something of that like. once, we even had an order for 2 cans of beer for newyears eve for a para who had been in the hospital for 5 months. (that was just because it was new years) a little creativity goes a long way.
    Originally posted by kaknurse
    We had a patient once who was an alcoholic and a COPDer. The doc, a pulmonologist, would write..Black Velvet, 30cc Q6hrs,prn..I am NOT kidding either. The pharmacy had to go to the liquor store and buy a bottle of BV and then we had to keep it locked in the narc cupboard and sign out each shot of BV!!!!

    Kelly
  4. by   Mitzi-RN
    Got a diabetic patient transferred from another facility with the transfer orders as follows

    If patient receives Humulin N coverage, for god sakes make sure he is transferred with his feeding running.

    If he doesn't have his feeding going, and receives insulin, he will die. We will have killed him.

    Do not touch dressings. I will do them myself. I know how they should be done.

    This doc was known for his colorful charting, but some of the things still make my jaw drop!
  5. by   soundsLikesirens
    Several nurses who have worked longer than I told me they have seen the following order:

    "Tub bath, stat"

    Evidently, some of the patients coming in hadn't discovered the joys of personal hygiene........
  6. by   samrn32
    this wasn't an order but was found on a chest xray report
    CONCLUSION:
    There is a left lower leg infiltrate with associated pleural fluid.


    No wonder she was in so much pain.
  7. by   krisfroggie
    I actually had a Dr. write an order to: wash patients clothes!!!

    is that not horrible...And I dropped everything to do it right away....NOT!!!
  8. by   frann
    Our hospital was rebuilt less than 10 years ago. They have nice private rooms. One day up on the fifth floor one of our crazy patients unscrewed the panel under the window. Almost sucked him and his nurses out! They now have pretty fabric covered things over the panels. who are these idiots that build these buildings. I could just imagine getting sucked out one day at work! Talk about a damn bad day.
  9. by   canoehead
    Stat Colace 100mg po and then BID

    (different doc)

    0305h Bolus 500cc NS (for symptomatic vtach)

    0308 Continue NS bolus over 20 min, call if arrythmia continues.

    0310 Finish NS bolus and don't call me again until it is done.

    0312 Code blue called and pt cardioverted unsuccessfully, transferred to ICU.

    This was my first code- as house sup.

    I've gotten a bit better, and more assertive over the years.
  10. by   amychick28
    I THINK I'VE GOT ONE...MAYBE THIS IS A REAL DIAGNOSIS BUT TO MY KNOWLEDGE I DON'T REMEMBER BEING TAUGHT IT IN NURSING SCHOOL.....I WORK IN LTC AND IN A PT'S CHART ONCE I NOTICED THAT A DR HAD WRITTEN THE DX OF "PIDDLITIS" FOR A PT ON DETROL......???? GO FIGURE? HEE.HEE...EVEN IF IT DOES HAPPEN TO BE A REAL DX IT'S A PRETTY FUNNY ONE!
  11. by   micro


    Had pt. that insisted that eating raw potato relieved nausea. Knew that dietary would question request for raw potato, so called dr. and got order for raw potato times one PRN for nausea.

    micro
  12. by   Jeanine
    We had an ER Attending who refused to talk to the nurses. I guess we weren't "worthy" of his time. A poor elderly patient was in respiratory distress and on a 100% NRB mask on arrival. While my back was turned to get an IV, the MD placed a post-it note on the mask. When I turned around, the MD was gone. The post-it note read "Prepare to intubate". Needless to say, this MD didn't last very long, Thank Goodness!
  13. by   Bee Bee
    Jeanine all I can say to that is "the arrogant so & so"
    Some of them seem to forget they are people too.

    Well I am just a new graduate and have to funny ones from my student years.

    1) When working on the orthopedic ward I came across this that was written under the diagnosis SOSFOLFOFNOF



    After tracking down the dr he explained it to be "same old story frail old lady fell over, fractured neck of femar". Quietly I smiled to myself while my preceptor suggested that whilest it was funny maybe not quite appropriate.

    2) In the paediatric ward a discharge summary read

    Fell from monkey bars at school
    FOOSH!

    My preceptor laughed honestly thinking the dr was making sound effects, I suggested (in a very non-threatening way, as you do when you are a student) that is could POSSIBLY mean "Fell on out streached hand".

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