enjoying religion without actually being religious yourself?

RedInScrubs, ASN, RN · Jun 20, 2014

We actually took a personality test when I finished my LPN certificate, and my top result was spiritual, which wasn't surprising to me. It threw a few people who knew me in the class, because I'm actually an atheist, and most people assume that to be spiritual and connected, you somehow need some higher power. For me, my spirituality is heavily wrapped up in people and the human experience, and I don't need a higher power in my life to appreciate that. Part of the human experience is expressions of joy, and for many people, that is religious in nature, and I find it lovely, as well.

I actually believe I picked that up from my grandfather, who was a Reverend. He was the Chaplain at our local hospital for 30 years, did traveling sermons to rural areas, rocked the collar, and was a dedicated member of the staff. He was there before people went into surgery, often was the first one they saw when they woke up, and would often go around the hospital to just drop in and say hello to patients and listen to them.

Big thing with him, though, was he never offered to pray for them. He never blessed them, prayed for them, or otherwise mentioned his god unless they asked. Obviously, he was religious, because he wore the collar and the uniform, so people knew who and what he was at all times, but his weapon in the world was listening, learning, and loving people as people first, and giving them permission to be themselves first before anything else.

I think that's something that many people, religious and non, forget. Regardless of where you stand, we all share the human condition, and you can celebrate that in many forms. Sometimes, you just have to be able to see it differently.

allnurses Guide · Jun 20, 2014

. . .He never blessed them, prayed for them, or otherwise mentioned his god unless they asked. Obviously, he was religious, because he wore the collar and the uniform, so people knew who and what he was at all times, but his weapon in the world was listening, learning, and loving people as people first, and giving them permission to be themselves first before anything else.

And this is really what it's all about to me as well. Your grandfather sounds awesome and you were blessed (a word I use without believing in a traditional deity myself) to have him.

verene, MSN · Oct 13, 2014

I enjoy learning about different religions. I wish more people would be okay with talking about religion in order to educate and share and still be okay when the other person disagrees or doesn't immediately chose to convert. There is so much beauty and depth to various religious traditions and I think that by being able to step into a space where you can learn from, respect, and appreciate the good in another's traditions is a great way to building understanding of human nature and of one another.

I typically don't bring up religion in conversations, particularly workplace conversations, but one co-worker and I have actually had some good and very educational discussions on the subject.

SeattleJess · Oct 17, 2014

I absolutely love this post, it warmed my heart just reading it because it reminded me of the many people I've worked with in the past who also would sing or hum gospel songs or answer "blessed". Personally, I am a Christian and a Catholic, but it doesn't matter to me what other people's religions are. In this country (United States) we have freedom of religion and we are so lucky to have that right. As a matter of fact even when I hear people of other religions singing in different languages I usually find that powerful and beautiful also. I like having people of different religions together, accepting each other, learning about each other, coming together in peace... I do have to admit though that I have had one problem at work with another nurse and religion. I don't know what religion she was but she was required to pray a certain amount of times per day in a quiet area and could not be disturbed... which I understand and would not want to disrupt. But she put a call out to a physician, did not tell me she put the call out, did not tell me what patient it was for or what the call was concerning, and then did not tell me she was going on this prayer break. She left the floor and it took forever to find her. I hated to interrupt her but I opened the door just a crack and whispered her name, apologized profusely for interrupting such an intimate moment, but she just ignored me. That doctor was not pleased and I had to take the brunt of it. Oh yes, one more thing for the home care nurses. I recently took care of a baby for about 2 years and at Christmas time I found myself singing Christmas songs to her; well her family is Muslim. Since they are a different religion I wanted to make sure I did not offend the family so I asked them is it okay with them if I sing Christmas songs to her.... they had no problem with it.... it might seem like a silly thing but it could have offended them. That baby LOVES Silent Night!

Jillybean, your story about homecare shows respect and consideration and love and acting in the best teachings of your faith.

As to your coworker, that doesn't seem to be about religion so much as professionalism. Healthcare professionals DO NOT LEAVE WITHOUT MAKING CLEAR AND COMPLETE REPORT. If you're a nurse and you this, it's called "abandonment" and you could (and maybe should) lose your license; betting CNAs have similar responsibilities to patients/residents. I'm sorry you had to take the brunt for another person's lapse. That seems like bad management. Hope you bounced back intact.

chopwood carrywater · Oct 19, 2014

I believe in God, but not in organized religion. I think that all religions have some truths to them, and I don't think any one religion or belief system has ALL the answers or gets everything right. Re: afterlife, I'm agnostic & don't think anyone really knows anything about the details of that.
But I actually really enjoy talking with people about their beliefs. I find it really interesting to hear about how other people think and what they believe, even if it's not what I believe. The only time I've ever felt offended or uncomfortable was when a patient started talking about his beliefs and it devolved into a homophobic rant. I like to focus on what we have in common when a patient wants to talk about his/her faith, rather than focusing on the things about that faith that I don't agree with. I've had patients of various faiths ask me to pray with them and I feel honored that they would ask and am happy to do so. There's a nurse who occasionally sings gospel/worship songs on Sunday mornings while prepping for med pass, and idk, I don't have to be a Christian to think that's beautiful. :) (and sounds a lot more lovely than other things you generally hear in the hallways at work! ) or another nurse who, when you ask her "how are you today" answers "blessed". :) I was just like...huh. i like that! she raised the positive energy in the room with that mindset/answer.
I would never bring up religion or beliefs with patients or co-workers, but if they bring it up, I'm happy to listen and ask them questions and learn more. Am I weird? Or are any of you the same way? It seems like most people who aren't religious also don't want to encounter any of that at work and are offended by it, but i think displays of faith/discussions of faith are beautiful even if i'm not a believer myself.

Not a believer, usually not offended.

RNsRWe, ASN, RN · Oct 31, 2014

I frequently find myself 'the token Jew' and am never offended or upset when people ask me questions. Assuming, of course, they are actually asking me a question for the purpose of greater learning, of better understanding. Only if someone is really "asking" because they're more interested in a confrontation or starting something unpleasant do I beg off....and move away.

Honestly, I find many people have good, genuine curiosity and I'm more than happy to share what I know; sometimes it's a myth around a holiday or event that confuses people, or the difference between 'custom' and 'law' that people want to understand (as in "why does Leah do it this way, but Susan does it that way?" kinds of things).