Here's the quick story: All my life I've been super hyperactive. I get distracted easily, bounce around like crazy, and cannot shut up. Getting through school has been a task so far and I have trouble making friends/maintaining good relationships at work. Often times I try to slow myself down, but I can't
, and I say things I know are unnecessary but I just cannot stop. At home I tend to get these bouts of feeling "hyperactive" that are hard to control and hard to channel into anything useful for any decent amount of time, and I often know my sometimes childish behavior is going too far for people but once I get like that it's hard to control. At work not so much because I am a new nurse aide and I'm so busy trying to keep up with everything (busy jobs have helped a lot), it's only noticeable there to people because I cannot stand silence, or when I'm trying to organize my tasks for that part of the shift (at every break, I try to plan out what I'm doing until the next break).
Mixed views: I've had previous bosses friends and family tell me I'm a classic case for ADHD but my parents didn't believe in it, so treatment was always out of the question. Now I'm afraid to ask my doctor because I don't want to be laughed out of the office, and I don't know if a diagnosis would interfere with my chances of getting into my nursing program, or finding a job as a nurse if I were medicated.
Why I'm asking now: It's been debated since I was a small child, and I am twenty one in January. I'm finding school harder and harder to focus on as time goes by, even though the classes and the information fascinates me, and though I have no trouble understanding the material. I am wondering if seeking a diagnosis/treatment might be beneficial to me as my classes and work and domestic demands increase. I also want to quit smoking, a habit that I use to "take breaks" and refocus myself. Its very hard for me to follow through on anything at all, the only thing I feel I've improved on these past few months is my work attendance. If there's a chance this could balance me out, I think it may help my anxiety as well, which I can't take medication for because I can't function on it.
It's hard to be the calm and focused one at work, but I try as hard as I can for my residents. I feel that with time and experience I will be very good at what I do. I'm just afraid to ask my doctor and worried about my loved ones finding out if I do have ADHD or if I do go on medications. There seem to be a lot of people here with experience with ADHD, and so I figured it would be safe to talk here.
Thank you for listening, guys.