I need help and a have a few questions...

[sl33y]

I was fired last week for diversion. I am so ****** at myself and can't believe this has happened.

The hospital is not pressing charges against me as they know me and my character and work ethic was great while there, until recently.

I self-reported to my BON and am trying to get into the VRP. They told me that I cannot participate IF I have charges filed against me.

They also stated that the DEA could file charges. Does anyone know what the likelyhood of this happening is? And how long would it take to find out whether or not charges will be filed?

Is 2 months going to go by and all of a sudden cops come arrest me at my house?

I am so screwed and I really need this recovery program to get back on the right track.

[sissiesmama, ASN, RN]

Hello - Please don't feel like you are alone in this. You are not the only one who has done that. My name is Anne and I am a nurse, but I am also an addict. I have been clean and sober since August 16th, 1999. I took a break from nursing and started working for the owners of McDonald's doing PR and some bday parties and commercials.

Well, one Saturday am about 9am, the owner made me and the maintenance man go up on the roof, which was about 20 feet. I can still remember every detail. It was drizzling, and cool weather. The rain is the only thing that saved me from doing something REALLY stupid. I sat on the roof thinking "if I ' slipped off the roof, what kind of drugs would I get?' ". So, I did it. I earned a trip in the ambulance to the closest ER, crutches, Toradol and a sling for one arm. Not exactly what I had planned!

So, I went back to nursing, because I thought I knew how to work the system and get whatever meds I wanted. I lasted 5 months, and got stupid sloppy and got busted. Not the proudest moment of my life, to say the least.

I admitted to the DON what I had been doing, and called state BON and had to wait a month to get a bed in a state facility because my health insurance didn't kick in until the next month. I told my mom, because I had to have a ride to treatment. I asked her not to tell my dad until after I had left the parish linebecause he would be disappointed in me. More than being embarrassed, I was paranoid. I crouched on the floor of the house I had been living in. I did this fgor a month waiting on an inpatient bed. I had caller ID and never answered the phone if it was an out of the city limits call because I was scared it waas "them" . I stayed crouched on the floor every time I heard a car slowing down looking out the blinds.

I know I am rambling here, but I hope I have said SOMETHING that may help you somehow. Please feel free to pm me anytime. I'll be glad to help. Just please get into rehab somewhere and get a sponsor, if you haven't yet. You can beat this, but you cant do it alone!

Good luck, I'll be praying for you and your family!!

Anne, RNC

PM me anytime you need to!:loveya: You too Lance, us birds of a feather need to stick together!!

[sl33y]

Lance

I sent you a pm with my email addy. The mods don't like when you post email addresses in public threads:)

I check my email VERY frequently, so shoot me an email whenever!

[Silverdragon102, BSN]

it isn't that we don't like it, it is part of terms of service and for your own safety

posting e-mail addresses:

we do not allow members to post their email address, if you would like to have someone contact you personally, please use the private message system that is included with your account. if you do post email addresses, they will be removed. thanks.

terms of service

[lucky.2.b.alive]

Live up to everything, including the DEA. Yes they could come knocking on your door. You don't know who feels betrayed by your actions. Just when you think you have your life back in order, you get that knock on the door. Shame on your facility for NOT reporting you! They would have done you a favor. Seek professional treatment immediately! First things First! YOU are a DRUG ADDICT! Get help. It's available and works!

[sl33y]

^

Settle down, there! My facility DID report me, it's just that they are not pressing charges.

That doesn't mean someone else won't (ie DEA, etc).

I HAVE indeed started treatment and applied for my BON's VRP program, so I know I am an addict and am finally getting some help.

Thank for the info, though...

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Good luck. There are always consequences to the wreckage of our past. But if we stay honest, open minded, and willing to go through whatever it is we have to go through, then on the side is peace.

[chiefshewho]

Sl-

God is very forgiving

Other people start to forgive to. I know my husband was furious. Wants divorce, how could you work for years for that degree and throw it away, etc. He just told me how much I mean to him today. Its been a little over 90 days. People forgive. Maybe you need to let her vent and you need to sit still in all these feelings. Its been so hard for me to just feel. Maybe she will stay maybe she won't. Thats a addicts repercussion. You have alot of them comming just like me. Don't give up. I haven't. I just met with the BON a few weeks ago and was accepted into their program. I have been staying sober and doing what treatment, employer, and BON tells me to. Its alot of hoops but I now see that light.

[sl33y]

Thanks for the kind words, chief:)

[tiak41]

its true i was arrested a yr and a half later,,,,i hope it works out for u cause after all i went through to keep my license,ican't get a job with a misdeamnor of theft, it really sucks

[Magsulfate, BSN, RN]

Lance,,,

Don't worry too much about getting arrested now... They would have done it already. From what I hear when talking to other TPAPN participants, most hospitals/agencies in texas report straight to TPAPN and don't file charges....

Good luck to both of you, Lance and sl33y. I just graduated from TPAPN, and let me tell you, if feels so good not to have to call in every morning for those drug tests. It also feels good to have my life in order. But I still watch over my shoulder, making sure I don't give in to my urges again. Write me a line if you ever need advice or a 'pick me up'.. you will find that as time goes by, it will get better. Everything will get better.

[myownworstenemy]

Sl33y,

Just wondered how things are going for you at this point. Please post updates and let us know how you are doing.:nuke:

[sl33y]

Hey, everyone!

Things are going well - I just started outpatient tx and am going to 2-3 NA meetings per week.

I also got a job offer doing PCT work in a Dialysis center, so I guess I'll have some income while I go through the early recovery process and treatment.

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR PRAYERS AND KIND WORDS!

Please do keep comments coming - I still check this thread/forum daily...