Am I crazy to plan a wedding going into my final MSN semester?

Specialties NP

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Specializes in Family Medicine, Tele/Cardiac, Camp.

Hi NP's! :)

I'm cross-posting from the breakroom (where I accidentally posted instead of here ) so I hope that's okay.

Anyway I'm posting today with great excitement in my life. On New Years, at midnight, my boyfriend and I got engaged. I knew it would happen eventually, but I didn't expect it to be quite so soon. Of course I said yes and I'm super excited to be engaged and begin planning our life together.

My question is this. In a couple of weeks I'm starting my final semester of my MSN program. I know it will be CRAZY busy and I realistically probably won't have time to dig my heels in with wedding planning until May. BUT, we really want to get married in October of 2014 - both of our Mom's are in relatively rough shape health-wise (mine has COPD and his is undergoing chemo) and I'm terrified that if we wait until Oct 2015 one or both won't be able to see us get married.

Knowing we're both relatively poor financially speaking, and that the venue will most likely be an 8-hour drive away, do you think we could pull this off? I've never planned a wedding before and really know very little about the whole process. We wouldn't want anything crazy big. Maybe 50 guests tops - and done very simply at an outdoor venue. I know it may be better financially (and perhaps with my sanity) to wait until 2015, but I hate the thought of waiting another - almost - 2 years.

Any thoughts? Thanks so much.

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Specializes in Medicine.

I planned a wedding in the middle of the first portion of a direct entry masters program, we were married in Florida (I live in Boston). It's pretty exhausting but honestly it gave me something to think about rather than just school :) I wish I had a little more time to plan and maybe I would have been able to do some more little details that I wanted to but it ended up being great. PM me if you want to ask any questions!

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Specializes in ICU, CVICU, Case Management.

Congratulations, you have a lot to look forward to...

You may want to secure the venue now, then work out the rest of the details later, after May.

May- Oct 2014 is still a lot of time for the other wedding details once you have the venue confirmed.

We got engaged in November and married in May (6 months later)-- about the same size wedding you are planning. We used the botanical garden (no flowers to buy) and it was lovely. The only hiccup- we had to use the botanical garden of a different town (about 30 minutes away) because the one in our town was booked.

Take care and best wishes ,

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Go for it but DON'T sweat the small stuff because that is what can bring you down and at the end of the day, a wedding is just one day. Have fun planning and keep it light-hearted as there are so many decisions it can become easy to get wrapped up in them. Also, delegate! My bridesmaids were so wanting to help and I didn't have them do anything - I wish I had made use of their willingness and given them some small stuff to do.

I'm hoping to be pregnant my second year in a part-time NP program. Is it ideal? No. Will it be hard and will I likely cut down to PT work or not work at all? Yes. But, the show must go on!

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.

I think it might be smarter to plan a simple wedding at a venue near you. If your priority is to have both of your mothers present, it may be far easier for them to deal with a simple wedding near home than traveling eight hours for a wedding. Of course, if you're having the wedding eight hours away in order to be closer to your mothers so that they don't have to travel, you're doing the right thing!

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Specializes in PICU.

I think it's fine, except make sure you plan the three weeks before you take boards so that there is no wedding planning those weeks. You will need dedicated study time and time to focus on passing boards. Other than that, you'll be fine:)

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Specializes in ER and family advanced nursing practice.

Yes, you can do it. Just don't go all weddingzilla, and it should go well. You can have both a memorable and meaningful ceremony within the parameters you mentioned, but you will have to work as a team. Congratulations!

Ivan

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Specializes in Family Medicine, Tele/Cardiac, Camp.

Thanks for all the suggestions, everyone. we had ultimately decided last week to just wait until 2015. But then yesterday we found out his Mom has taken a turn for the worse. Now we don't know WHERE to have it. If we have it up in New England where he and I (and his Mom) live, my Mom probably won't be able to make it. If we have it down in Virginia where my mother lives, his Mom probably won't be able to make it. I know we'll figure it out, but right now the wedding planning is taking a back seat so we can focus on his Mom. :(

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Thanks for all the suggestions, everyone. we had ultimately decided last week to just wait until 2015. But then yesterday we found out his Mom has taken a turn for the worse. Now we don't know WHERE to have it. If we have it up in New England where he and I (and his Mom) live, my Mom probably won't be able to make it. If we have it down in Virginia where my mother lives, his Mom probably won't be able to make it. I know we'll figure it out, but right now the wedding planning is taking a back seat so we can focus on his Mom. :(

I'm so sorry about your future mother-in-law.

Again, if your priority is having your mothers present at your wedding, just get married where your mothers are. There is nothing that says you can't "get married" twice. In fact, it's common in some countries to have a civil ceremony followed by a religious one. If one of the mothers is more religious than the other, that would make it really easy to decide.

The ceremony (and the party afterward) could be planned for what the mother in question can tolerate physically. If your fiance's mother is very ill, perhaps a simple ceremony and a low key party in the garden? In her church? In her home? Then go all out for the other wedding.

Or you could solve the whole issue by just eloping to some tropical beach during spring break, and having a party afterward in the home town of each of the mothers.

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Congrats to you! I think 50 guests is a small enough number that you would be able to plan it but I agree with rmicu, secure the venue now (which will require a $$$ deposit) everything else, you can take your time and enjoy the process~! We got married in St.Lucia with a small group of our close friends (there was 10 of us) and then had a wedding party once we got back. Honestly, if I had to do it all again I would have just tried to convine our parents to go and not have the home party...that was more stressful!

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Specializes in Pediatric Pulmonology and Allergy.

I agree with other posters that if both mothers can't make it, do a pre- or post-wedding party in the other location so both sides of the family can participate.

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