Tired of being talked to like I am stupid

Nurses Relations

Published

I've been in my nursing career for 8 months now...learned an awful lot - still have A LOT to learn of course. However, I do feel I can carry my own. I've handled so many emergencies, caught low lab values, questioned orders that don't sound quite right, take initiative, etc. I have noticed there is no "new grad" exceptions when it comes to assignments so I must be doing okay if I'm handling some of the most complicated patient's on the unit right??? Why is it that a couple of Docs talk to me like I am a COMPLETE IDIOT. When do I get to shake this stigma of being a new grad? Ugh I'm so sick of it.

It is not just because you are a new grad. Alot of doctors talk down to nurses like they are incompitent or something. I have watched a DR at my hospital talk down to one of the best nurses I know who has been head nurse on chest pain for well over 15 years. The funniest part was she snapped back and proved the doctor wrong!!! I think you should just stand your ground with these doctors alot of them think they are better than you when in all actuality we are the ones doing all of the patient care besides diagnosing pretty much.

Who sits by the patient through there stay?

Who takes care of the patient when they need help?

Who has to deal with all of the families of patients?

The nurses do 90 percent of the work. So just blow it off when they treat you like you are dumb. Its not only you.

I've been in my nursing career for 8 months now...learned an awful lot - still have A LOT to learn of course. However, I do feel I can carry my own. I've handled so many emergencies, caught low lab values, questioned orders that don't sound quite right, take initiative, etc. I have noticed there is no "new grad" exceptions when it comes to assignments so I must be doing okay if I'm handling some of the most complicated patient's on the unit right??? Why is it that a couple of Docs talk to me like I am a COMPLETE IDIOT. When do I get to shake this stigma of being a new grad? Ugh I'm so sick of it.

Stand your ground like the nest person states, you are afterall your patients nurse advocacy no matter what! Be stern, open minded, learn what you can from them, looking beyond their egos! You may earn ther respect in time and beleive it or not you may never! That's all about them not you! Keep your chin up, be strong for you and your pt's they will be very appreciative. The Dr's are appreciative too believe it or not they just won't give you credit to your face!:yeah:twinklebelle

Specializes in Army Medic.

I wish we had some Doctors on this board who could provide insight as to why they might be so curt with people.

I can only assume all sorts of things - but it seems like the work load really takes it's toll on a Doctor's humanity if they aren't of the proper mind set from the get go.

Specializes in A myriad of specialties.
i've been in my nursing career for 8 months now...learned an awful lot - still have a lot to learn of course. however, i do feel i can carry my own. i've handled so many emergencies, caught low lab values, questioned orders that don't sound quite right, take initiative, etc. i have noticed there is no "new grad" exceptions when it comes to assignments so i must be doing okay if i'm handling some of the most complicated patient's on the unit right??? why is it that a couple of docs talk to me like i am a complete idiot. when do i get to shake this stigma of being a new grad? ugh i'm so sick of it.

sadly, i must say you just have to get used to the docs' belittling chatter; one of these days after you've had enough, just say:"i believe you are being disrespectful, please stop it." ....or say:"should we go to management and discuss your disrespectful treatment of me?" then walk away. you may have to do this several times when confronted with those who treat you like an idiot. it may be years before some treat you like you're no longer a new grad.

Specializes in Emergency, Trauma, Critical Care.

I think most of them are just like that in general.

They usually talk down to me about stuff that isn't even my job.....One asked "where is this patient" Well we dont have a night secretary to update the board.....so the doc just assumed the patient is gone. And frankly updating the board is not my job and I have more important things to do like take care of patients. The doc ranted on about how that inconvenienced him. I suggested he recommend we get a night secretary on nights so there would be someone available to have time to do that, as it wasn't my job.

He shut up, I think sometimes they just think we're supposed to do everything and do it now and quick. It gets frustrating tho.

Specializes in Rodeo Nursing (Neuro).

I've written, usually to new nurses who were overwhelmed or lacked confidence, that self-assessment is one of a new nurses biggest challenges, and I'll repeat that here. While it's possible--likely, even--that the doctors the OP speaks of are jerks, it should not be assumed that's the whole problem, nor dismissed as "new nurse stigma." You can't overlook the possibility that you are an idiot.

Well, okay, that was harsh. What I mean is, to write this off as docs being docs is missing a chance to critically self evaluate one's performance. Are you paging appropriately? Some of my newbie peers have a tendency to page over every darned thing. They may be technically correct, that the doctor has to be notified, but sometimes they don't have to be notified right now, and they can be notified of several things all at once. I've seen people call for a low K of 3.4, then again 20 minutes later when the rest of the labs come back and the hemoglobin is 9.9. I did something like that, myself, one morning at 0500, and the doc very politely mentioned, "We always look at labs before we round." So, if it's close to time to prepare for rounds, like 0500, and not a critical value, I'll usually leave them alone.

The other big issue is presentation, and that's tougher. Are you projecting confidence? Or too much confidence? If you are too diffident, you invite condescension. Too cocky, and they won't trust you. I almost never address docs by their first name, unless they specifically want me to, but I look at them as part of the team and not some authority on high. I'm not gleeful or deprecating if I catch an error, and many times when I "question" an order, I'm asking so I can learn why we're doing something.

I'm also lucky. I work nights in a teaching hospital, so I'm usually dealing with residents whose priority is the same as mine--not getting reamed by the attending. And we're a neurosciences floor, so we tend to talk to the same docs and get to know them--even the attendings are usually collegial. Plus, I'm a middle-aged male. I used to see an off-service resident, medicine, I think, who always addressed me as, "Sir," since in his culture, respect for one's elders is still the norm.

And I'm not assuming the OP is guilty of any of these things. Some docs definitely do talk down, and if you are younger, and female, you're especially at risk, and that's their bad, not yours. On the other hand, you can't change them, so it's probably worth some reflection to think about how you can alter the equation. Just something to think about.

It is not just because you are a new grad. Alot of doctors talk down to nurses like they are incompitent or something. I have watched a DR at my hospital talk down to one of the best nurses I know who has been head nurse on chest pain for well over 15 years. The funniest part was she snapped back and proved the doctor wrong!!! I think you should just stand your ground with these doctors alot of them think they are better than you when in all actuality we are the ones doing all of the patient care besides diagnosing pretty much.

Who sits by the patient through there stay?

Who takes care of the patient when they need help?

Who has to deal with all of the families of patients?

The nurses do 90 percent of the work. So just blow it off when they treat you like you are dumb. Its not only you.

I can buy your argument, but not the last one. In my own opinion, that last statement is just used as consolation. Really, we do 90percent and get paid less?

I'm yet to see a nurse perform a surgery. Really I love my nurses but we need to be real sometimes. There are bad eggs in both professions, if I were a doctor and I read this, I'd probably get hot.Or maybe not, because hey I get paid more than you::D Seriously though, nurses and physicians complement each other.

I've been in my nursing career for 8 months now...learned an awful lot - still have A LOT to learn of course. However, I do feel I can carry my own. I've handled so many emergencies, caught low lab values, questioned orders that don't sound quite right, take initiative, etc. I have noticed there is no "new grad" exceptions when it comes to assignments so I must be doing okay if I'm handling some of the most complicated patient's on the unit right??? Why is it that a couple of Docs talk to me like I am a COMPLETE IDIOT. When do I get to shake this stigma of being a new grad? Ugh I'm so sick of it.

Not to be deprecating, but all I read in your post is, "I" this and "I" that. Get a trusted colleague and let him/her give you an honest evaluation because most times we have colored opinions when it comes to dealing with self. You're eight months gone with experience under your belt, you're no longer, techincally speaking a new grad.

Once you began to handle your set of patients effectively and efficiently, you changed that label, now it's up to you to chane it outwardly. Maybe I'm just blessed but I'm yet to meet a rude physician. All as nice and courteous as can be.With prayers, I trust it will remain that way. And if by some fluke, one happen along, then I chalk it down to experience. If you had mentioned women, maybe there would have been a better case...maybe not. But then, I'm jaded on women.:idea:

Specializes in critical care, PACU.

This is typical on my unit and I have been warned of certain doctors who are purposefully harsh to new nurses. Just know your patients very well. Every time I am right when the doctor second guesses me, I know that internally, I have increased his confidence in me just a little bit.

Specializes in Med Surg-Geriatrics.

Nurses take the heat from all angles and it doesn't matter if you've been doing this forever,a thick hide helps in this profession

I think they are being taught in medical school that it's ok to insult nurses. You ever notice, even the medical students do the same thing. Oh God help a doctor that would step on my toes, i would make him feel like a 7th grader in middle school. He would forget everything he learned in medical school. :smokin:

+ Add a Comment