How do you cope with looking "too young" to be a nurse?

Nurses Relations

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Hi everyone. I'm Lacey, and I'm new to this forum!

Anyways, I look young for my age. And being short as well doesn't help. I've had people beat me up emotionally for looking "too young" to be a nurse. They think I'm a teenager. People don't take me seriously at all, and it's hard to feel like an adult because of it. What are some ways to help me cope with this?

Thank you.

I have to giggle a little at this thread -- sometimes I go months without getting a comment about how young I look, then suddenly I get attacked everyday for weeks straight about it!! It doesn't bother me too much unless it is very condescending, in which case I try to be as confident as possible and maybe discreetly bring up how long I've been at it (FYI I am a tech not a nurse yet!).

But last week I went to buy champagne -- the associate refused because she was certain it was a fake I.D. They had to call over the manager to verify it was really me. All I could think was, if I was a teenager with a fake I.D., I'd be buying something stronger than champagne :cheeky:

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Ain't that the truth....like I'd lie about being practically 40 - yeah right! :)

Yep - it's the condescending depths some stoop to that I can't hack. I agree 100%.

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Specializes in ICU.

Bringonthenight, I don't think you've had the experiences we're talking about if you think it's not ageism and condescending. Curiosity is one thing, and that's okay, but outright accusation that I'm incompetent because of my age is something else altogether. It's there in the tone of voice. I want patients to treat me like I'm a nurse right off the bat, not that I'm a kid who wandered into their room and started playing dress up with scrubs. That's how it really feels sometimes. I went to school for this and I'm a professional - I don't enjoy being talked down to because of how I look. I don't put up with being talked down to from physicians, what in the world makes patients think I'm going to tolerate it from them?

I really don't get why you think this behavior is okay. Would it be okay if the patient was insinuating the nurse was incompetent because the nurse from an ethnic group the patient didn't like, or the nurse was of another religion? Is it okay for the patient to say, "Honey, aren't you a little too fat to be a nurse?" If it's not okay under those circumstances, it's not okay when it's about the nurse's age either.

I get a lot of satisfaction in telling those people that 90% of my nursing school class was younger than I am. That usually shuts them up.

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Specializes in Geriatrics, Transplant, Education.

I've definitely been the recipient of some ageist comments. I'm 27 years old and honestly don't look much older than I did when I was 18. When I get the benign sort of "how old are you" comments by a patient that's just making conversation, I chuckle and say "older than you think I am". When I get nasty comments about age/experience/"are you sure you're qualified to do this", I kindly remind them that I have a sum total of seven years of formal nursing education, recently culminating in my MSN in Nursing Education. That usually fixes them up.

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Specializes in Oncology; medical specialty website.

Eventually you won't be the youngest.

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Specializes in Geriatrics, Hospice.

wow, sounds like a little bit of jealousy to me. Maybe you wish YOU didn't look 10 years OLDER than you are? YOU MAD?

I can also attest to the experiences some of the nurses on here have had. I too look about 16 and am years older than that. It does get annoying to have to keep addressing questions and comments about my age. I don't approach older professionals and say "Hey you look like you"re about 75 years old, aren't you too old to be doing such and such? Maybe you should retire". I would get fried on the stake if I did. It's rude and disrespectful point blank.

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