RubySlippers06 1,915 Views
Joined Aug 16, '12.
Posts: 140 (32% Liked)
...you have a ton of comments on here; so I am not so sure my two cents will be beneficial, but here it is.
You remind me a lot of myself, back in the day. Therefore, I will tell you a story about myself. Take it as you please. Hopefully, it will benefit you. I was *that* girl who didn't get along with other people very well. All the cliques had something against me; I did nothing but complain constantly; the world was against me, etc. There I was, going about my business and I had no clue what everyone had against me. I was overly sarcastic and extremely blunt. That, mixed with a poor attitude, it's no wonder nobody wanted to be my friend.
Then, I decided I did truly care for people and wanted to become a nurse. I came onto this board looking for advice and what it meant to be a nurse. Well, my attitude regarding life followed my tone. I got my butt handed to me a number of times, like you are now. I started to hate the idea of nursing because I didn't want to work with this culture. A number of people pointed out my attitude and what they called "immaturity" on this site. I hated them. Then, I started to wonder if I could be the problem. My normal was to point out problems with others and hide behind my sarcasm. I was so scared to be myself bc being the sarcastic, hardcore b***h was easier and less scary. So, what did I do?
I started to look inside myself so I could be the best possible person I could be. I realized I had a lot of flaws. Then, I spent the next year just trying to become more positive. If something bad happened, I would ask myself one simple question: "What can I do, right now, to make this better?" or, "What about this situation have a learned?" That helped me a lot. After practicing this and looking at what I am grateful for daily, I can honestly say I am happier than I have ever been. Bonus: People genuinely like me now! I am involved in volunteer work, but mostly doing things on my own time. I was behind the scenes for about 6 months before I met the other members of the group. Now, people are always telling me what great things they have heard about me or how much everyone says how great I am...
I'll give you an example of sh*t hitting the fan and I was able to come out a better person. I was accepted into a wonderful nursing program, after having to put it on hold for the military. (Husband is active duty army) Then, right before I was about to purchase books, I find out that we have to move states. This means I have to put school off ANOTHER semester and re-apply to a school in a state I have never been to; and the school is extremely competitive. Also, my GPA dropped bc hubs deployed and I chose to focus on my kids more than school, thinking I was already good to go for NS. Old me would have wasted SO MUCH energy complaining about the army, moving, transferring schools, etc. You name it, I would have complained about it until everyone stopped listening. There's a good chance I would have said eff it. Instead, new me (I like to think more along the lines of real me) decided to say, "Okay, what I can do to make this better and what are the benefits?" I was able to take a semester off school and spend more time with my kids and prepare for my husband coming home. Now, I am also able to go to a school that is cheaper, has a higher NCLEX pass rate, and one more semester of clinicals. I could go on, but you get the point.
I am telling you this, and it's a little personal for me, because I am hoping you (and everyone else) can look inside yourselves and admit the faults. Once you do, it may be something you can improve on and be a happier you. I didn't even realize how negative I was! I hate to admit it, but the directness of the nurses on here really helped me see my attitude for what it was. Now, I can see just how beautiful life can be! Also, a lot of women old me would have stayed away from are some of my very best friends. They've taught me so much! Mostly, I have learned true compassion.
Perhaps that "stupid girl" you are referring to has some huge struggles in her home life or maybe she has a learning disability she is too embarrassed to tell anyone about. There was a girl in my micro class who was taking it for the second time with a nursing class she was taking for the second time. She is gorgeous, long legs, athletic, etc. Anyways, I kind of blew her off as young and dumb. Then, I met her in my (and her) favorite coffee shop. I had just taken the lab test and she was studying. I sat down and asked if she'd like some help. We had mutual friends. Ends up, she is dyslexic! Her and I are like soul sisters and she is incredibly bright. Lesson learned.
Anyways, sorry for the novel. I just wanted to share with you what I have learned by being the old me and the benefits of discovering the real me. I sincerely wish you the best of luck. Admitting you need to improve part of your personality is not easy, I know that from experience. But, you can do it if you feel you need to!
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