mother/babyRN 9,912 Views
Joined Feb 26, '02.
Posts: 1,959 (3% Liked)
Does anyone see the danger of Alcohol in these posts? Abusers look for advantages, alcohol provides this advantage. Social drinking is a way to silence that voice screaming caution. No one needs the results we have seen posted here.
Predators should be castrated. I'm willing to forgive, but there are results to our actions. This should be a result for proven sexual predators, its about power, arrogance and evil.
I do admire your courage and strength. I too am a victim, but I reported the incident to authorities in 1992. I wished that I hadn't at the time, I was led to believe that it was my fault because I did have 1 drink and dinner and that was the wrong thing to do. I was not treated as a victim by any means, including the DA. So it never went to trial. Years later, while googling the persons name, I found that because of my report his name appeared in a small article and several ladies took that as a warning. For me that was a little redemption.
Am a new member and i'm jsut glad to see that you have been strong enough to go through the pain of that incident, I may not know how you have felt but God does and he loves you so much that He has not abandoned you throughtout.
I feel your pain. I am a victim of abuse (a trusted family member). I was abused from the age of seven to seventeen. But, with the love of my family, friends, and the love of my life I've survived and succeeded. The battle is won, the war will be too!!!
that was an awesome story! very courageous of you! i also have to applaude you on the way you constructed your story. i like how you encorporated the word "she" throughout the story and with the last sentance. very well written!
It seemed like it was going to be just another usual Sunday night on our med/surg floor where I work as a tech prior to starting nursing school in the fall. A 3-11 shift doesn't include baths, but if the patient is incontinent of bowel, there's a good chance that a tech will change the sheets, bath the patient, provide a clean gown several times in the course of the night. This can be an unpleasant task; let's face it, being up to your elbows in someone else's bowel movement isn't very delightful, especially if it is the liquid, odiferous, potentially C-diff bearing stool that was the case with this particular patient on this particular night. However, I do my darndest not to shy away from these situations, as I can only imagine how difficult it is for the patient to be so limited and to need that sort of personal care repeatedly.
As I was getting the linens ready and running some warm water in the sink while preparing to clean up the patient, I began humming a tune. I'm a singer in my out-of-the-hospital world, and I frequently get tunes in my head, which I sing or hum. As I came from the bathroom, the patient this night heard me humming, and began to sing the words with me. I asked him if he knew the whole song, and he said he did, so we started off together at the beginning. He knew me only by my voice, as he was quite elderly and blind as well. We started talking about songs we knew and loved, and before I knew it, we started singing some of our favorite numbers from the musical "South Pacific." I was joking how, now that I was older, I was going to be too old to play Nellie Forbush (my dream ingénue role), but instead would have to play Bloody Mary. That naturally led me into the song made famous by that character in the show, and we were laughing by the end of the bedding change.
He had no control over the illness that was ravishing his GI system, so I was in the room several times that night. We sang songs from "Carousel", from "Oklahoma", from "The Music Man", "The Sound of Music", all of those oldie-but-goodie Broadway shows. There was a 45 year age difference between us, but we both had loved all those songs and had them tucked away in our memories. What could have been a distasteful and smelly task instead became, for both of us, a delightful break in the monotony of the long shift.
When at shift's end I came to get his final set of vitals and to help him settle in for the night, I told him I'd thought of the perfect song to end the night's songfest, a lovely tune from the World War One era entitled "Till We Meet Again". Now, while the song's lyrics are written for sweethearts, and that wasn't our case, it was still a lovely thought to wish each other well, until we were to meet again. We sang it together, and I wished him a pleasant good evening.
Two days later, I had to come into the hospital for an educational meeting for techs. I wasn't scheduled to work again until the weekend, and I usually exit out the back door to the employee parking lot. As I was completing a cell phone call, I stayed on the main floor planning to exit using the door by the ICU (I never go out that door on a normal basis.) Glancing into the ICU waiting room, I saw his family, whom I'd met earlier that Sunday night when they came for a visit. Going to them, they told me how he'd slipped downhill rapidly on Monday, and things did not look good. I had their permission to visit their dad, so I went into his room. He was on a respirator, and was completely unresponsive. It was evident from looking at the vitals and other info on the machines at bedside that he was very critical. I held his hand, and quietly sang to him "Till We Meet Again" one last time, and left. It seemed a very fortuitous choice of exits to me; otherwise I'd never have known he was in the ICU.
The next day, his obituary notice appeared in our local paper. I cried a little, and yet, it was a comforting thought to know that on his last aware night of his 88+ years on this earth, he sang the old songs he loved so well, had talked about his beloved deceased wife of 60+ years, and knew that while he was in a difficult care situation with the diarrhea he was suffering, that he'd given ME the gift of his music as well.
Rest in peace, Mr. W.; until we meet again.
I want to thank you guys who posted - you are brave women.
This really hits me..My empathy with all of you who had experienced this..God never sleeps and He never forgets one single assaulted person..He is always and forever in our battles thats why all of us are still standing and moving..God bless us all!
I grieve for thee.....
I spent many years offering treatment services to offenders...They steal from everything they touch...
I pray that you find healing...
thank you for that. my grandmother was a victim of rape by a housebreaker when she was in her 70's. older women are not safe, i wish in all justice that they were. for a man to take advantage of your grief to commit such a crime is an outrage. best wishes in your healing. what happened to my grandmother has prompted me to become a SANE nurse, i am in the training now.
my rape was in the 70s but I still cry . I only remember that he wanted oral sex because it would get him going for the whole night. I kept telling him my husband and 2 small girls were waiting for me. When we got to the remote spot , I wondered if I would be buried there and noone knew who should take care of my little girls.Afterwards I made sure that my sister knew she should take them if I died. I had seen this man where I worked but did not know him. Keep safe
Your story moved me to tears. It is really unbelievable that date rape is so rampant here. I learned this thru allnurses.com. It is just not safe to simply trust any man we know. We can never tell. I have lived in this country for over 2 years now and U.S. is my new home. I believe I still have alot to learn about society and the prevailing social problems. Rape, mass shooting, terrorist threat, any more.... ...
Thank you for opening a dialogue for all those who have been raped. I was raped before I was a nurse and before I gained 50 pounds. Is some of America's wt problem our fear of being smaller than? Even at 180 I am not as big as my assailant -I got out of work as the bars closed, He had waited for me and chased me to my car in front of my co workers . I locked my door(the only unlocked door).He somehow got in through the stationwagon's rear window, which he had opened while I was at work. My electric close was slower than this big guy! He was angry at me for trying to shut him out. When we got to a secluded area-he had shoved me out of the driver seat and was driving my wagon-I pretended to be 'comatose' . Thank heavens this frightened him . He drove me back to the parking lot . I was still pretending to be 'unresponsive' Lucky? Yes. In the era of cell phones I hope someone might call 911,but back then they didn't exist. LOCK YOUR CAR AT ALL TIMES!
Hugs you honey with all my heart if that could help you in somehow! Hearing your story I saw one my front one of my heart closed girl friend telling me her story ! After she told me her life story and looking at her how small it is and how life changed her, each and every night when somebody cry in the night on the street I wake-up thinking that is her asking to be saved....Dear you... you are a strong woman and God will give you the power to forget, hugs with all my heart Zuzi
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