OK we get it STUD, you're straight

Nursing Students Male Students

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Something has been bothering me for quite some time on this forum and I have not known exactly what it was. Well I figured it out and y'all may not like it.

So often when reading posts on the Men in Nursing or Male Nursing Student sections I feel like I am part of one of the most homophobic systems I have been a part of since I left the US Navy.

If I read one more post in which the man feels he must refer to himself as "Normal", "Married", "not one of them", "Real Man" etc. [not kidding, direct quotes] I am going to scream. :madface: You can say it STUD, we get it, you are straight and we're damn glad for you. [better you than me]

One question I want to ask you students is just how the hell do you know for sure which of the guys in your class are "abNormal", "unMarried", "one of them", "not a Real Man" etc. have your instructors had everyone disclose their sexual orientation during introductions? I have seen pretty well adjusted men turn up the testosterone so far when in the presence of a known gay man that they loose all sense and become flaming A**HOLES to prove that they are not "one of them". Not a way to become part of the team sparky.

Let me give all you Normal, Married, Real Men a reality check. The cold hard truth is that there are gay men in nursing. Thank goodness nursing has been a profession that really didn't care one way or the other as long as you were a good nurse. Unfortunately the schools and media in an effort to make sure everyone knows all male nurses aren't gay [Are you man enough campaign?] that it feels like we are being pushed back into the closet.

Last piece of advice and I will shut up. DO NOT ASSUME. I assure you when you meet me you will not know that I am gay; I love NASCAR, Rodeo, Horses, Motorcycles, camping, just like a real man. The only difference is that my SO is a man. The one stereotype I will admit to here is I can be one vindictive ***** and I will not be receptive to your good ole boy jokes or you making sure I know you are not "one of them".

So yes there are more and more men entering nursing which is a great thing, but like any change their will be growing pains, we need to identify them, not sweep them under the rug and hope they go away.

Specializes in Emergency Nursing.

I am just thinking this through so bear with me:

A problem I have is when anyone takes their act too far. I understand that a lot of effeminate men can't help it, but what they can help is becoming b****y, talk-to-the-hand divas. In the same way, other dudes can't help being hairy-backed, somewhat loud aggressors, but they can help being sexist, BMOC Douchebags.

Neither extreme is really emblematic of anything, the former isn't really feminine and the latter isn't really masculine, both are unpleasant for everyone and more than a little pathological (as has been said).

So for me, I don't really care who you're having sex with, just don't be a jackmonkey.

Specializes in ICU.

I had a Western Civ. Professor that put it the best way. "In this country you have the right to life liberty and the persuit of happiness. You also have the right of free speech. You do NOT have the right to force others to accept your choices . You do NOT have the right for your free speech to be heard by others. Also you will, no matter who you are, be criticized for some of your life choices, so be prepared for it. If you can not handle the criticism, make better choices".

Specializes in ER/Trauma.

Interestingly enough - I have yet to meet a single homosexual [i'm not fond of gay/straight term] health care professional.

I have a few friends and acquaintances that I know are homosexual - but not a single health care professional (male or female).

My standard reply to "so you're a male nurse?" (I borrowed it from a nurse here on AN).

"Yeah. Becoming a female nurse is kinda expensive - what with all the surgeries and hormone therapy and all that. And to be honest with ya - I kinda like being able to pee standing up..."

:p

cheers,

Specializes in OR.

Why is there a male nurse forum anyway?

We are all nurses.. just like you guys are saying...:dancgrp:

Specializes in ICU.
Why is there a male nurse forum anyway?

We are all nurses.. just like you guys are saying...:dancgrp:

In a nutshell, the reason there is a male nurse forum is because male nurses run into situations that are unique to them. Such as when dealing with female patients, especially young female patients, dealing with female co-workers, as well as the stereotype of a male nurse.

Specializes in OR.

Oh, I haven't noticed that in the OR, maybe I just don't even think about it though cuz it really is not relevant.

Patient's get the same level of care whether we are male or female..

I think in the OR the male nurses are respected a bit more, and it is certainly nice working with a staffing mix rather than

all female.

Cheers:)

Specializes in ICU.

A patient in the OR or ED is in a completely different state of mind than one in L&D, Ortho, peds, etc. Very seldom will a nurse of any gender be alone for any length of time with an OR or ED patient. While in school I was warned by a couple of my instructors, as well as clinical instructors, and floor nurses to CYA. They said as quick as people are to sue make sure I am always 100% covered, that there is no sense of inpropriety, even if I have to get a female nurse to accompany me with certain procedures. I have noticed often times the family is bothered more by my being male than the patient is.

Specializes in Forensic Psychiatric Nursing.

Had and experience tonight where I failed to respect female modesty. I didn't leave the room while the pt removed her bra, she thought I was being "pervy" for whatever that's worth.

I could have just as easily provided her with warm blankets, let her know to ring the call bell when she was ready to be assessed, and taken her needs into account.

Being a murse is a little different. I'm still learning the ropes, but I think there's more to it than just assuming that female patients automatically look at me and see RN... sometimes they just see Boy.

I just started working as a STNA in a nursing home a few weeks ago, and it's interesting being a guy. Some people are completely fine with my, but I'll still walk in to rooms and they are shocked to see a guy. I've been told by some residents that I'll make a great nurse, and then I've also been told that I'll be a horrible nurse and won't make it through nursing school simply because I'm a guy. The other STNA's (all women) get furious when the residents say that, but I think it's just something that I've come to accept already. There is a stereotype that guys aren't going to make good nurses, which is sad. It's understandable for the elderly and older adults because they never experienced male nurses, but to have such prejudice in this era is a shame.

On the subject of this forum post, we have a gay STNA at work, and he is by far the best worker there that I have seen, and many other nurses and STNA's have said that about him. I think that if he worked first or second shift, and had to interact with the families, though, it'd be a little harder. No matter how good of a worker he is, if they found out that he was gay, they would probably not want him working with their family. No one on first shift has realized yet that I'm gay, and in a way I'm kind of happy about that. I don't want the residents or their families to treat me any different. I know the staff would accept me, but I wish something like who I love wouldn't change how the people I take care of feel about me. I think as time goes on, and the people of my generation are in nursing homes, there will not be nearly as much prejudice towards both gay nurses and male nurses in general.

Specializes in ICU.
WOW. That is certainly an extreme, and offensive, analogy.

Big difference in 1 sentence:

Gays form relationships & have consenual sex with other like minded individuals; pedophiles prey upon & victimize those who who don't have the legal or developmental capacity to consent.

Make sense?

My point isn't what each group is doing. My point is each group's rational for their actions.

Make sense?

Specializes in Med-Surg, Telemetry, Stepdown, ICU.

Realllly... who gives a toot?

Well I am a 'straight' male, and I have no issues working with or being around other gay men. In fact, I helped convince my ex girl friends brother to come out of the 'closet.' That being said, here in the south (NC) people tend to be a bit more apprehensive to gay people than other places of the country, this is most likely because of the geographical area I live in, it's in the bible belt (nothing against any religions), and of course the stereotypical 'image' of what a man should be like. I know I personally have had women ask me if I was gay or not in one way or another, but I am glad that they asked because I would rather them ask than assume. I can empathize with you bro, and it's sad that there are men that feel the need to stand out to others and make it a known fact that they are not gay. If you ask me, that indicates that they have a serious psychological issue with gays or perhaps have had a one time visit down gay ally (lol.)

I will say that there was one case where I was in class (and all my class mates were girls) and we were in the break area, and the girls that were at my table knew a gay guy that was sitting a lone, and they told him to come sit beside them. He would not do it, and I really think that it was because I was there, and he just assumed I was straight, and it would make me uncomfortable or something if he were to come sit near us.

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