Double standard for men? - page 3

by grpman | 6,556 Views | 29 Comments

Has anyone else noticed that situations or topics deemed "innapropriate for women" are fair game for men in nursing school? For instance, and I could write for hours, in clinicals the women jokingly asked to try catheter... Read More


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    Interesting that you guys have had these problems with sexual harassment. My problem is that I am gay until proven straight, lol. I had a patient claim that I had stuck my finger in his bottom, and when he told me to stop, I did it harder. None of that was true of course, I was simply wiping his butt clean, and the patient was known for his difficulty to deal with. Luckily, this happened during my orientation, so I had another CNA to stand as a witness. However, the DON and the nurse administrator still had to have a meeting with me during work, and question me about the whole thing.
  2. 0
    Quote from butterfliesandzebras
    Umm, how is it these lovely girls, including the instructor, are privy to the fact you are well endowed? Or was that just a general question, obviously meant to embarrass you, just thrown out there? Either way, it's all about timing; if you joke around with a female student today, she's cool with it, but tomorrow, either post or pre-test stress, she is looking to hang u by the balls! They are loose canons, just avoid such joking altogether, don't get wrapped up in their webs.
    Lol. I thought of how that sounded but was hoping everyone would get what I was saying. I will elaborate so minds won't wander. The instructor in OB was making sure that everyone knew that sex wouldn't hurt the baby even if a man is well endowed (although this was phrased very tastefully). So jokes in the class started being made and someone looked at me and asked, with the class listening, if I could hurt the baby. Again, it was funny, and I wasn't bothered. However, it could be a real problem given a role reversal or another man with different feelings.
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    Ah, okay. So they were stating that you were going to have sex with the baby. That is a huge relief. Sex before birth won't hurt the baby. Okay. Still inappropriate, just not as nearly as inappropriate as before.

    Still be very careful my friend. I have had it happen to me, and seen it happen to others...everything is fine as long as everyone gets along...as soon as someone falls out of favor (you)...then they will use everything you have said (doesn't matter if they laughed, or if they started the conversation) against you...and you have to defend why you just didn't walk away.
  4. 3
    Quote from grpman
    I'm really not going anywhere with this other than I'm really curious what you think. Let me know.
    Men and women are different. Film at 11.
    Esme12, grpman, and PMFB-RN like this.
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    Be very careful!!! I have worked as a paramedic and know that one coworker or fellow student can be telling the whole station a graphic story about anal sex or being punched in the face during intercourse and its OK by the company present. Others might threaten a write-up...

    You just never know. Who cares about the double standard? If your skin is thin enough to let something like that bother you, you might just have the wrong career. I have worked in construction for the last 12 years and know alot about hostile workplaces, harassment, etc. Be strong, be smart, don't screw up your career because you want to make a lewd comment to counter the ladies.

    Don't forget your wit.
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    A very close female friend of mine was a nurse educator at a local community college. She advised me not to apply to their nursing program because there are a couple of instructors that are very anti-male. She said they felt like men were invading their territory. She said several of the instructors would talk about how they were going to get rid of certain students they didn't like. Not just male students. She said the main reason she left and took a nurse educator job at a local hospital was because she didn't want to get mixed-up in a lawsuit down the road.

    Perhaps one reason there is a double standard is because for years male dominated jobs have implemented sexual harassment training, where female dominated professions have not as much.
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    I honestly do sense a bit of a double standard in nursing. I work on the Labor & Delivery floor at our local hospital, as a Nursing Support while I get my degree. Like pretty much I'm just a janitor, but still, its a job.. I'm constantly getting jokes from the nurses, about being the only male, or others will purposely cone in and say stuff like "Morning ladies" then look for me to react negatively. There was one nurse who asked me not to take my break in the nursing lounge (which is a completely different room from the locker room) because I made her "uncomfortable." Like I don't really let it bother me, I got way worse crap when I was in the Army, it just kinda blind sided me that people were so narrow minded. Just had to kinda share my experience, but I definitely won't let it deter me from what I want to do with my life..
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    Quote from loriangel14
    I don't think the types of remarks you have described are fair. I work with male nurses and haven't witnessed these types of remarks in the work place but I think they are certainly inappropriate and if it was men singling out a woman in class there would be a stink made.Is the instructor approachable? I would certainly speak to her if she was.
    I agree with this. It is not fair to you. You are bothered by it or you would not bring up the subject. This should be discussed with the instructor or her supervisor. You have as much right to attend school in a non-threatening atmosphere as the women do, should the "joking" be reversed. Speak up for yourself.
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    In my opinion there seems generally to be an immaturity amongst nurses, particularly younger ones, bordering almost on an obsession with the male genitals. How do nurses expect to be treated respectfully and as professionals when this behavior prevails? It does not matter whether the patient hears or sees this happen. There is a saying ' that true ethics are shown when someone thinks no one can see'. Thanks, from a female doctor of 27 years experience. Twana.
    PMFB-RN likes this.
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    I'm a second year RN student, retired Army Equal Opportunity/Sexual Harassment representative, and I'm 46 y/o. I have been the only male in my clinical groups, and one of maybe 15 males out of 120 students. I find that most of the horsing around happens with the younger girls. The older girls and women with life experience are usually pretty professional. The younger girls don't have the experience interacting professionally with men, so I think they overcompensate by being overly open in the presence of male colleagues. I think it's their way of letting you know they accept you. I'd like to think that the majority of them mean no harm, and just like with any profession, or really any area of life, you get some good apples and some bad ones. As long as you are professional in everything you do, you will be OK. Even if an accusation is made against you, it will be unfounded due to no evidence. I find it hard to believe that if you conduct yourself in a professional manner at all times there will be more than one bad apple willing to swear under oath that you harassed them, or another in their presence.
    chriskelly likes this.


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