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- I look at it this way...if you choose to let him do what he wishes and continue to hang out with him knowing what he does, then you're not as concered as you sound, and with him "walking all over you", you must not be really putting forth the effort to stand your ground. A person, no matter their career choice would not allow one to jepordize thier career and continue to hang around while he does his extra curricular activities. A sensible and concered person would give them the boot if they really wanted to protect themselves and their career. Hanging out with people who are into drugs are asking for trouble. You didn't actually rob the bank but you drove the getaway car, you're still going to jail. Ditch the fool if you really value your career, or you will eventually end up a loser like him.
- Sep 20, '12 by jadelpnI don't know how to sugarcoat this....so I won't. You friend/relative is an idiot.
He doesn't have a job, but thinks nothing of putting yours in jepordy. Which he is.
Ya'll are too old for peer pressure stuff--
And I wouldn't put too much thought into someone who can't go a bit in a car without smoking pot.
REALLY? Cause his Mom and Daddy won't let him smoke in the basement???????
As an adult with a job and responsibility you don't need to explain why it is you don't drink or use drugs.
He should "try everything at least once" and go the heck to work. But chances are he will ignore it.
- Sep 20, '12 by gypsyd8I do not think the subject is moronic at all. On the one hand, this person's relative is showing enormous disrespect by smoking in the car. I don't smoke tobacco cigarettes in someone else car, home, or other personal space. Its rude and obnoxious. Why on earth would anyone think weed is any different?
The jackass shouldn't be using any intoxicant in the car, no matter what type. Whether he is the passenger is also irrelevant. Weed is an intoxicant and one should not use intoxicants in a vehicle. One cannot drink a beer in the car, even if one is not driving (ie the passenger in a moving vehicle). If the driver gets stopped with open container (regardless of whose it is) in the car the driver is going down for DUI. One cannot even be under the influence in a stopped vehicle with the keys in the ignition without running the risk of being arrested for DUI. It would be this way even if weed were legal. LIKE IT SHOULD BE.
On the other hand, why should my career be at stake if I go to a concert, a club, a walk in the park or anywhere else where I might catch a whiff of weed? What if I am a home health nurse and one of my clients uses medical marijuana? Hell, what if I have a prescription for it?
These are legitimate questions.Last edit by gypsyd8 on Sep 20, '12 : Reason: clarity
- Sep 20, '12 by pwiser69I like that everybody is giving this guy good advice and all but instead of all the negativity (yes I think some is in here) how about just answer his question? I know one person said it is possible but does anybody else have more info for this guy since thats what he is asking for? He is on the other hand not asking for a moral lesson or telling him to stop letting people walk all over him yada yada yada
I am pretty sure since he stated it he knows what the dangers are.
- Sep 20, '12 by SENSUALBLISSINFLI agree with Gypsy, this topic has a forum. I am sure there is one black sheep in every family.
To the OP, I will try to post my view in the most non-judgemental way....I am sure the reason you went to school is to have a better life, I can probably even go as far as knowing that you will pursue nursing further. You like what you do, and hopefully where you work as well....so why risk it?
I understand about loyalty and such, but is he thinking of being loyal to you as well?
Whatever he does in his own home is his business, but like Dr. Phil says, you train people how to treat you...he needs to respect you and he is not..... Would you be so forgiven if you lose your job because of it? Can you imagine being fired for something that you are not responsible for, much less this?
Re- assess and impose your rules.
- Sep 20, '12 by kimseySeveral years ago before I became a nurse, i was in a living situation that exposed me to quite a bit of 2nd hand marijuana smoke almost daily - and not much that I could do about it, as I was graciously given a place to stay during some difficult times (and thankfully was able to find better living arrangements quickly). I was able to pass a urine drug screening for a police dispatch job (as well as having to admit to being exposed to 2nd hand smoke, though did not have to state I was living with people who were smoking, because you have to pass a polygraph and it's best to be upfront). The only thing that kept me from the job was not passing the personality test - and I was 1st pick for the job until that!
If you are concerned about 2nd hand smoke exposure causing a positive drug test, my suggestion would be to go pick up one of the marijuana tests from the walgreens/cvs/etc and take it just to be certain (particularly after being exposed) - I think they're about $20 or so and then you'll know if it's an issue and then you can try to address it with your family member - I typically try to explain to people that I can lose my licenses for those types of things and I don't appreciate their lack of respect for my surroundings and well being and will typically remove myself from the situation if possible.
I also agree with the others about using it in your car - doesn't matter how far in the country you are you should never let anyone use any substance including alcohol in your car while you are driving, it's just a bad idea because even if you are not using you could still be held liable for it as well as given a possession charge - guilty by association, basically and i know where I live that's typically something you get put on suspension/probation pending investigation by the board and you have to go through a treatment program and NA/AA meetings to restore your license status.Last edit by kimsey on Sep 20, '12 : Reason: addition
- But he does bear some responsibility if he loses his job...he's choosing to keep hanging around this person knowing there can be some repercussions for doing so. The old adage "actions speak louder than words" can apply here. It's two fold..action: knowingly hanging around this pothead & the inaction: not separating himself from it..the possible reaction: loss of job & license, and the fault wouldn't fall squarely on mr. fried brains. Some ties need to be broken and this is one of them. This particular nurse needs to be responsible and step up and do what's best for him and only him or face the possibility of a career killer that will follow him like a pesky gnat.