Did I make a mistake?

Specialties Hospice

Published

I have only been a licensed LPN since November and a hospice nurse since late January. I work the 11-7 shift and I love my job but recently I just feel like maybe I shouldn't be a nurse.

I am anxious a lot of the time that I'm here.. I'm not confident in any decisions I make.. I feel like I have no clue what I'm doing. We can always contact the RN on call but when I do I feel stupid.. I will give a medication and then I'll feel sick in my gut like maybe I should have given this instead.. am I over medicating? Am I under medicating? I care so much about my patients and what to do what's best for them but I feel like I'm failing no matter what I do...

Anyone else ever go through this? Should I hang up nursing? Maybe I'm not cut out for this...

Specializes in Emergency, ICU.

You're not incompetent. You are going through the normal learning curve of a new nurse. Just follow the medication orders as written by the MD. I understand most meds in hospice are PRN so this may be adding to your insecurity.

Do not feel bad about calling the RN on call. That is their job.

Ditto what edmia said. If you give up now, you will never give yourself the chance to get past the new nurse jitters. When giving a PRN med, look at it this way: the order reads (for instance) ' if the temp is 101 degrees or above, give X amount acetaminophen". You took your patient's temp as part of your assessment, the temp was 102, so you gave the ordered med and charted it, then the response. What is there to be anxious about? You did what you were supposed to do. The more times you engage in nursing behavior, the less unnecessary anxiety.

Specializes in NICU, PICU, Transport, L&D, Hospice.

Rule of Thumb...it takes a minimum of 6 months to get over feeling like you are dangerous each and everytime you go to work.

It takes about 12 months to feel like you can handle most routine situations without someone looking over your shoulder.

It takes about 3 years before you feel like you are nearing 'expertise' in your specialty.

If Brandi is your real name and that is your real avatar it sure is a lot of personal identifiers you're using which isn't that smart on a public nursing forum.

Specializes in Critical Care.

I'd be concerned if you didn't feel those things as new nurse, it's the ones that don't feel that which maybe shouldn't be in nursing.

Thank you everyone for the kind & encouraging words.. I love my job and I'm just going to have to learn not to be so hard on myself.. learning takes time and I'm just going to take it one day at a time :)

Welcome! I have been working for a little over a year now as an RN and I too remember those nights I would cry, feel incompetent, go over every decision I made at night...cried to work, cried in the bathroom at work, cried on my way home...we have all been there!

Welcome to nursing. We've all been there. This is the reason that it is generally recommended that you have at least one year of med-surg or related experience before getting into hospice. But since you are already there, first of all don't beat up on yourself. You are experiencing a normal reaction to being a new nurse. If you didn't feel these things, I'd be worried! You have to ask more questions, and your colleagues should understand that. You can't be expected to know the answers before you have had the experience. So don't be afraid to ask and don't apologize. As you know, the welfare of your patient always comes first. If you aren't sure or just need reassurance, ask. It is the right thing to do. Also, all of us have made mistakes, sometimes serious mistakes. That is an occupational hazard when you deal with life and death issues. Learn as much as you can, listen as much as you are able, and take the time you need to make safe decisions.

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