Umm this may sound silly but PLEASE HELP!!!!!

  1. Are there any other female nurses here or female nursing students that feel strange about giving genital care to a male. I as a 22 year old female feel a little uncomfortable with that and I am ashamed of the fact that I am going into nursing and I feel uncomfortable with it. I plan on going into either NICU, Pediatrics, or Postpartum nursing. Little boys do not intimidate me but older men do intimidate me. I know this sound totally silly. Of all the clinicals I have had I honestly have NEVER had a male patient for some unknown reason and my instructors do NOT know of any of this. This semester will probably be the semester I will get a male patient unless I luck out again but I doubt it. I want to be comfortable around them and not make them feel that I am intimidated or scared of them.

    Does anyone have any suggestions for me? Have anyone been through this before? What got you through the intimidation?
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  2. 11 Comments

  3. by   Love-A-Nurse
    i don't think you are being silly. if a male or female for that matter, can assist with their genital care, let them.

    if they can not, they are usually too ill or restricted by the usage of their hands/upper extremities to think about anything else but to get the care done.

    i have found that some men are just as uncomfortable with this particular care as the caregiver is.

    it is good to know what our "weakness" is before hand and then search for ways to deal with them.

  4. by   KernieRN
    I havent had the oppourtunity to work on a male patient yet, but i feel the same way you do. I agree with LPN,FutureRn because they will probably be more embarrased about it then we will. My only plans are not to let anyone know how nervous i am. Im sure once we do it once, we will probably wonder what all the fuss is about. Until then, dont worry about it and have faith in the skills that you have learned. It will all be second nature one day.

    Karen
  5. by   nursedawn67
    I found if the patient is unable to it themselves and are able to talk then I make small talk while getting the peri care done myself.
  6. by   renerian
    Don't worry hon I think it is normal to feel uncomfortable. I used to be that way until I had more men and found the quickest way to get over it was to just dive in and do it. it will get easier.

    renerian
  7. by   hobbes
    It's not silly at all. As a male, I'm sure I will go through the same initial trepidation about the female genitals but the key is to put on your professional hat and think about it as just doing your job - just another appendage to have to care for.
  8. by   janis9799
    This is not silly at all. I just got out of cna school,and I am taking some nursing prerequisites now. I think we have all felt embarrassed and weird doing pericare to a member of the opposite sex or even the same sex.

    I have always been uncomfortable around naked people. I used to get so embarrassed when my best friend would go to the bathroom (#1) in front of me if we had been out partying. I kept thinking if I am so embarrassed by naked people how can I possibly clean someone?

    My first day at clinicals for my cna class I was petrified of giving a bed bath for this very reason. Well my first hour there, the cna said I was going to give this old man a bath. I was really hoping for someone who had alzheimer's so they wouldn't be "there". I went in and asked a few questionsabout how to do things (we hadn't gotten a chance to practice on the dummies at school). So she said she would do the older man and I would do the next person.

    We go into the next room so I can do my bed bath and laying there was a 38 year old quadriplegic. All I could think is, "Ugh, I got a young guy." I was sooooo emabarrassed. :imbar I wanted to just die. But I thought to myself you have to be professional, and he is probably more embarrassed than you, just pretend you know what you are doing.

    I lucked out, he had been hurt 18 years ago, so he was used to people doing things to him. He joked around. He told me exactly what to do. He liked using his shampoo, didn't like too much lotion, move his leg etc . Alot of cna's hated him because he was such a control freak, but for me it was good because I didn't fumble. I made small talk with him. I pretended to myself I had done this a hundred times. I got through it. I wasn't embarrassed after that.

    Once you do it once it winds up being no big deal. I try and think about what a good thing I am doing when I have to do icky things or embarrassing things. By doing them I have made the patient feel clean and comfortable. For some people their quality of life is so poor that being clean is the only thing that makes them feel good anymore, I am glad to be able to help them.
  9. by   GPatty
    Tonya~
    It gets easier as time goes on. Have faith in yourself, and know you can do this....
    God bless ya girl....
    Julie
  10. by   emily_mom
    I don't think you're silly at all.

    Just think how uncomfortable the guy probably is. Once you've seen a couple penises, you've seen them all. They all kind of look alike after awhile.

    Except my husbands....his is of course one of a kind!

    Kristy
  11. by   babynursewannab
    KRISTY!!! :roll
  12. by   Sadysly
    I don't think you are being silly but you need to let your instructors know so they are there for support when you overcome this fear...and you will have to overcome it...We had a girl in our colass that had a 76 y/o male pt. she thought he had a necrotic area on the head of his penis upon closer inspection she realized it was a tattoo that read, "Hop on" She almost died of embarassment...she pulled through so will you!:imbar
  13. by   Love-A-Nurse
    originally posted by sadysly
    i don't think you are being silly but you need to let your instructors know so they are there for support when you overcome this fear...and you will have to overcome it...we had a girl in our colass that had a 76 y/o male pt. she thought he had a necrotic area on the head of his penis upon closer inspection she realized it was a tattoo that read, "hop on" she almost died of embarassment...she pulled through so will you!:imbar
    welcome to the board!

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