champagne enema - page 2

My textbook mentioned champagne enemas, but it didn't anything else about them. This seems really weird to me, I can't figure out why anyone would use champagne for an enema. It must be something... Read More

  1. by   hollyster
    A near sighted bartender maybe?????
  2. by   Pachinko
    "Honey, do you want darjeeling or jasmine?"
    "Make mine Cristal!"
  3. by   hospitalstaph
    Quote from elizabells
    I seem to remember reading a book about S&M (for a gender politics class, I swear!) and it talked about people dying from alcohol enemas. Also coffee. Heck, milk and molasses sounds weird enough to me!
    Yeah right a class!! I believe you. Milk and molassaes? Were cookies involved?

    Tracy
  4. by   Rhee
    Okay, this is what my book says....

    "Other enema solutions, such as milk and molasses, vegetable oils, hydrogen peroxide, and champagne are reported in literature. However, these types are rarely used."

    I've heard of milk and molasses, and I can understand vegetable oil and hydrogen peroxide, but a champagne enema just seems like a waste of champagne.....

    My instructor didn't know why anyone would use champagne for an enema, either.
  5. by   Gompers
    Quote from Rhee

    I've heard of milk and molasses, and I can understand vegetable oil and hydrogen peroxide, but a champagne enema just seems like a waste of champagne.....

    Right, like if they just wanted the carbonation factor, why not just use seltzer or club soda and skip the alcohol? Unless it has to do with osmolarity?
  6. by   KarafromPhilly
    Hm...would the vintage be required for the order to be considered complete?

    (One of the ads just above this box says, "Enema Kits. Great deals on new and used items. Search for enema kits now!" Ick ick ick.)
  7. by   Altra
    Quote from KarafromPhilly
    (One of the ads just above this box says, "Enema Kits. Great deals on new and used items. Search for enema kits now!" Ick ick ick.)
    OMG! I agree ... what a waste of champagne!
  8. by   VivaLasViejas
    All this talk reminds me of an old joke I heard when I was about 18:

    There was this overweight man who had tried every diet on the market, only to gain the weight back every time. Finally, in desperation he went to his doctor, who, instead of prescribing a diet, told the man he could have whatever he wanted---cakes, pies, junk food, beer, anything his heart desired. There was only one minor caveat: every single morsel had to go up his rectum, instead of in his mouth.

    Well, about three months later, the man came back to the doctor's office, forty pounds lighter and more energetic than he had been in his life. As he spoke with the MD, the physician noted that while the man was obviously happier and healthier, he seemed restless.......in fact, he stood there bouncing on his feet during the entire interview. The MD couldn't help wondering what was making his patient so jumpy, so he said, "Well, you look great, and your blood pressure and pulse are down to normal....but I've noticed you seem a little nervous. What's going on?"

    The man said as the bouncing continued, "Well, I did like you told me---instead of eating, I've been putting everything up my rectum, and I've lost all kinds of weight. I feel like a new man, Doc."

    MD: "But why do you keep bouncing like that?"

    Man: "That? Oh, I'm just chewing gum."


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