What kills me..... (VENT)!!!

[shoegalRN]

I'm sorry but this will be a vent. After working 13+ busy shift in the ER, I come home to log on to here and it simply kills me that NON-nurses (including those in nursing school, or taking pre-reqs, or those who have not even graduated from high school yet!) comes on here and think they know what it's like to really be a nurse.

Oh really????

All the "I will never be that kind of nurse" threads, but never spent one HOUR in our Dansko's......

And the kicker? Telling how you will "handle a doctor when calling one", when yet, you have not had to actually deal with a doctor regarding direct PATIENT CARE!

The superior-know-it-all-attitude simply kills me!

All I can say is when SOME of you actually get into a nursing program, get through the nursing program, pass boards, be lucky enough to actually land a RN job, and then start WORKING as a licensed RN, I sure hope you are TEACHABLE! Because I can only imagine how your orientation will go, because it's simply not easy to teach people who already know it all or got all the answers, without really knowing what they don't know! And then we'll get flooded with threads about how nurses eat their young!

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

So no non-nurses should post on AllNurses?

I don't think not posting at all is the answer. Just remembering they are speaking to the choir would be enough most of the time.

People also don't seem to remember, nursing attracts people who are not "the norm". Those of us who have been in the field a long time tend to acquire strong opinions, some defensiveness, strange/dry humors and broken backs. Our views obviously are not going to match those of someone with, oh, say, an accounting background who is on the outside looking in. There are a great many things out there people will tell you, if you have not personally experienced it, you don't know what it is like: war, being robbed, being raped, a roller coaster, alcoholism, quitting smoking. Nursing is like that, if you haven't done it for a few years, you just don't understand us.

[6mostogo]

Just a thought, but I was brought to allnurses.com through a Facebook add. There is software that somehow gleans from my profile that I *might* be interested in this site, so it recommended it Both this software and the advertising from allnurse.com are relatively recent developments which probably would more likely be the cause of the sudden influx of 'pre'nursing and nursing students and other non-nursing personnel you all are describing.

[Nurselacey]

So no non-nurses should post on AllNurses?

In the appropriate areas..When you are attempting to vent about your day or looking for advice from people who "have been there did that" You don't need comments from people who are either still in school with CNA experience only or who haven't any knowledge at all but "textbook.

I have been a CNA, a LPN and a Lab Technologist/Phlebotomist and let me tell you NONE of it prepared me for nursing.

[Moogie]

although it's been over three decades, i vividly remember what it's like to be a nursing student, to get my first job, to be thrown into the mayhem without a preceptor and to try to learn to fit in. i didn't have the convenient excuse that "nurses eat their young" when i couldn't fit in or get along with my co-workers. i figured it was me, and strove to learn so i, too could be one of the expert nurses. these days, it sems that rather than examine themselves and their contributions to problems they're having fitting in at work, new nurses seem to cry "nurses eat their young." it's as if that gives them cart blanche to criticize anyone who is trying, however ineptly, to teach them something, help them fit in or critique some aspect of their practice that needs work.

whenever it has happened to me, i have always thought that it was my fault. it has taken me many years of experience---as a nurse and just in life---to realize that sometimes there are environments that are not conducive to new nurses or new employees. sometimes those environments are just dysfunctional and sometimes they're downright toxic. even when i have recognized that it was the environment and not me, i've found a way to blame myself for not seeing the dysfunction earlier.

sometimes i am a bit envious of the new nurses and students who can tell their stories here. i remember feeling very alone as a new nurse because no one talked about reality shock or difficulties getting along with others. i wish i had someone to whom i could have vented when i was starting out and i am grateful that i do have this board and the people here who can listen.

maybe it is healthier to an extent to blame the system instead of constantly blame oneself. i do get tired, though, of the polarization and this experienced nurse vs. new nurse drama. i always think that there are two sides to every conflict and if i can't change the way someone is treating me, i can at least change my reaction. or chalk it up to a learning experience and move on.

[Mona77]

After graduation I started my nursing career at the emergency unit and I was glad to have an experienced team supporting me, giving answers to millions of question, giving comfort when a pts situation changed dramatically, guiding me through emergency care and life thraetening situations and helping me to become a competent and skilled emergency nurse.

Without my team`s support I wouldn`t have gained the confidence I experience now!

We should all work with respect for the experienced RNs as well as for the New Grads.

There won`t be only one correct answer or way of acting; our point of view, former nursing and life experiences as well as current circumstances will determine our decisions and priority action.

Learn from the experienced RNs and and offer helpful suggestions, keep interested, hungry for knowledge, giving room to normal human reactions. (loughing, grieving, anger, frustration, the gamut of emotions)

That`s what I did!

[SWS RN, ASN, RN]

I loved the way you expressed this Eric+I feel the same way.

[SWS RN, ASN, RN]

I don't think not posting at all is the answer. Just remembering they are speaking to the choir would be enough most of the time.

People also don't seem to remember, nursing attracts people who are not "the norm". Those of us who have been in the field a long time tend to acquire strong opinions, some defensiveness, strange/dry humors and broken backs. Our views obviously are not going to match those of someone with, oh, say, an accounting background who is on the outside looking in. There are a great many things out there people will tell you, if you have not personally experienced it, you don't know what it is like: war, being robbed, being raped, a roller coaster, alcoholism, quitting smoking. Nursing is like that, if you haven't done it for a few years, you just don't understand us.

Well said Eric=feel the same way myself, and sometimes nursing is like war, rape, a roller coaster and it drives you to alcoholism!!!!!

And with that...I can just hear the comments from the very wanna bees that this thread is about

but, do I lie?

s

[eriksoln, BSN, RN]

Well said Eric=feel the same way myself, and sometimes nursing is like war, rape, a roller coaster and it drives you to alcoholism!!!!!

And with that...I can just hear the comments from the very wanna bees that this thread is about

but, do I lie?

s

I created a thread a while ago about non-nurses posting. I was very headstrong in it, a bit of a bully TBH. One very special "patient" talked to me offline about why they come here and like to chime in from time to time. I've since changed my views on who should and should not post on Allnurses.

Its not a matter of being allowed to post or not belonging here. Its a matter of timing and of knowing when your input is appreciated and when.......well, when the nurses are on here looking for like minded people to vent with. I have my issues and vents that I just don't care to share with patients/accountants/physicians/students. There are times where only another nurses input is going to help me. It is those times I resent the input from non-nurses.

Case in point: At work, I was venting about a very needy drug seeking patient. He was constantly asking for his methadone earlier and earlier. A major PIA. He would do things to make you come to his room, like kink his IV line so it occludes and you have to shut off the beeping. Then, when you were there, he'd start with the "Hey, since you are coming in here anyway, may as well get my methadone, I'm kinda starting to feel anxious." I wanted to strangle the guy. I was complaining about the whole thing to ANOTHER NURSE, and basically said he needed to straighten up and how I didn't care if he was happy or sad cause "He's an uninsured, no use to society drug addict abusing the system. Let him be unhappy, in fact I hope his is. I may just bring his methadone a bit late."

She told me to take a deep breath, reminded me why we were there and said to go take a five minute break. She also pointed out that whether he was insured or not was really not my business, shouldn't even enter the picture for how I feel about him.

Now, if an accountant/other pt./student had said any of the things to me she did, especially at that point in time, I'd have knocked their block off. But, its different coming from another nurse, someone who can give the advice/criticism and say "I've been there too, I know why you feel that way."

It is when moments such as this one are taken from me because people just can't help but think they are your brethren when they have not earned the right, that is when I resent the non-nurses.