Remembering to Feel - page 2

by beckster_01

4,446 Views | 18 Comments

Life can get crazy. For as long as I can remember I've heard all sorts of tragic stories. When I open the newspaper I read about countless bombings, shootings, house fires, and snipers. But I have become numb to the fact that bad... Read More


  1. 0
    What a touching story, I appreciate you sharing this.
  2. 1
    Thank you all for your kind words! It is good to know that I'm not alone in this kind of thing. It is such a balancing act to stay sensitive to people's struggles, but not to become consumed by them. But having such a great outlet like AN certainly helps
    anotherone likes this.
  3. 0
    Aww,,,thank you for sharing your wonderful story! very touching...this is the reality of life, and every day we have to deal with this..I just experienced a loss of significant other, so I can relate that we should let them feel that we love them as often as we can and we should also be thankful for everyday for God is still giving us another chance to live, so let us live meaningfully!
  4. 0
    Thank you for writing such important truth. This reminds me of a quote that goes something like: courage does not always roar, sometimes it is the voice at the end of the day that says, "I will try again tomorrow." Thank you for having the courage to feel. My personal belief is that your courage to feel is raising not only your consciousness, but the world's collective consciousness. Thank you.
  5. 3
    Quote from Jackson Browne
    Doctor, my eyes have seen the years
    And the slow parade of fears without crying
    Now I want to understand

    I have done all that I could
    To see the evil and the good without hiding
    You must help me if you can

    Doctor, my eyes
    Tell me what is wrong
    Was I unwise to leave them open for so long?

    'Cause I have wandered through this world
    And as each moment has unfurled
    I've been waiting to awaken from these dreams

    People go just where there will
    I never noticed them until I got this feeling
    That it's later than it seems

    Doctor, my eyes
    Tell me what you see
    I hear their cries
    Just say if it's too late for me

    Doctor, my eyes
    Cannot see the sky
    Is this the prize for having learned how not to cry?
    We are witness to some of life's most wrenching tragedies but sometimes touch a life in the most profound way.

    It is a delicate thing to be both emotionally engaged and clinically detached.

    Suffering children twist my heart up into knots... so hard not to see my own treasured child in their eyes.
    GrnTea, anotherone, and beckster_01 like this.
  6. 0
    Thank you for sharing, beautifully written. Sometimes I go home and I'm just overwhelmed with emotions. I feel so much at work, and give so much at work I sometimes have nothing left.
  7. 0
    As a student I have fears about many things. Some of my patients I care about desperately. But there are also times when I've felt like helping a couple of them pack so they can leave AMA (since they're doing every thing else AMA anyway, both in and out of the hospital - and completely resistant to working on any plan for their care).

    Will this make me a bad nurse that I don't care equally about my patients? When I worked with children and psych pts I always seemed to care. Somehow I could rationalize with psych patients that no matter what their behavior, they had an actual mental illness that kept them from processing info and reacting in a "normal" manner.

    Don't even know what I'm trying to say here other than... sometimes I seem overly rational to others I think, even though I may care deeply. I just worry that I'm not the all compassion all the time prototype of someone who will be an excellent nurse.
  8. 0
    Quote from Sadala
    As a student I have fears about many things. Some of my patients I care about desperately. But there are also times when I've felt like helping a couple of them pack so they can leave AMA (since they're doing every thing else AMA anyway, both in and out of the hospital - and completely resistant to working on any plan for their care).

    Will this make me a bad nurse that I don't care equally about my patients? When I worked with children and psych pts I always seemed to care. Somehow I could rationalize with psych patients that no matter what their behavior, they had an actual mental illness that kept them from processing info and reacting in a "normal" manner.

    Don't even know what I'm trying to say here other than... sometimes I seem overly rational to others I think, even though I may care deeply. I just worry that I'm not the all compassion all the time prototype of someone who will be an excellent nurse.
    Compassion can be resonated in various ways:

    Giving someone their last bath after refusing to go through any more treatments of dialysis and thanks you with their eyes because they don't have anything left due to the multi-organ system failure.

    You push your pt to do well...they curse at you, you stand their ground. They apologize and shake hands, then you spend 20 mins with them as they cry because they feel hopeless because they don't know if they are ever going to walk again. You shed some sobs as you get through helping them navigate their SCI education book and help them realize the power of the life they have ahead of them...and you see him walk out of the Rehab hospital.

    Watch children, who only have temporary time on this earth, go through the emotions of being scared, adjust to school life, like a girl, play and be a boy, all within the span of two years, until the brain tumor succumbs him; or the child who is in hospice with only the respiratory center of his brain is only functioning laugh like the cherub baby of hope, while you read him a story the Thursday before the Saturday he is called home.

    These are all significant situations I faced that I can think of within my 11 years of healthcare experience where I have compassionately cared for these pts...there will be more along the way....your pts will thank you and it will be significant to them...when you give yourself the chance to reflect, and debrief from your experiences occasionally, you will realize what steps you have taken to care for them, as well as reflect on how that experience shapes and changes who you are.

    Compassion can be built on the patients of your past, and of your future practice. It makes us better nurses, as well as better people.

    To the OP, beautiful...you have arrived.
  9. 0
    I feel like this sometimes, I had to train myself to do this, and then I had to go back and re-teach myself to feel it in a more controlled manner...i feel so much for that poor little girl :/ thank you for sharing!


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