nursing jobs for wife right out of nursing school - page 2

Howdy all,My wife will graduate nursing school here in Colorado Springs, CO at PPCC next May. She has told me that she doesn't want to work in the Springs because they don't pay nurses right out of... Read More

  1. by   msn2008
    Oh Boy! While I appreciate your concern and willingness to do this research for your wife, it sounds as if she really doesn't want this information. I can't imagine my ex-hubby looking for this info for me while we were still married, yet in counseling.

    Her graduation and seeking a job does impact your life, yet it is still her responsibility to job hunt and information seek.

    Good luck! and add me to the list of "thank-yous" for defending the USA.
  2. by   ktwlpn
    I think she is yanking your chain.Don't be a patsy.Do what you have to do to take care of your self.Let her do the same.By the time she graduates next May she will have a better idea of what she wants to do and it is not your responsibility to find her a job.Good Luck
  3. by   777RNThatsMe
    Yep. ditto x3. YOu can't find her a job. it's her responsibility to do so. In fact if I were a recruiter and a hubby called me on behalf of their spouse I wouldn't be impressed. She is a professional to be; and should act accordingly in finding her own job. It sounds like she has no desire to stick around. And, you are in denial.... so the thing is you have until May to work on your marriage and I suggest you do so.

    Re moving to keep the kids near both parents....good idea. My kids have suffered b/c my ex will NOT move to be near them.

    Seek your destiny, and remember only you control what YOu do not her; she is responsible for her own choices....do what is best for the kids and if that means following her around, do it so long as you don't loose who you are as a person in the meantime (and I doubt you would). Not saying "stalk" her ...lol...just saying....you all can have your own space while letting the kids be active in both lives. OR....have them fly like so many other kids....

    But face reality you are being shut off by your wife...and just go on with what you need to do...and remember ....you only can change your OWN behavior and thinking....not hers.

    Good luck!
  4. by   mcleanl
    Wow, I must have missed something in these posts because it seems to me that everyone posting is jumping to some pretty big conclusions about Hubbyof's wife.
  5. by   ktwlpn
    Quote from mcleanl
    Wow, I must have missed something in these posts because it seems to me that everyone posting is jumping to some pretty big conclusions about Hubbyof's wife.
    Really? Go back and read the posts-especially the 4th one where he finally admits to marital difficulties and states he is in counseling but she is not...I would not say anyone here is jumping to conclusions.I would say we are a really intuitive bunch...
  6. by   mcleanl
    Or maybe she is a mother of three and in nursing school. She might not have a second to spare at the moment.
  7. by   nuberianne_RN
    Wow! She is willing to move to another state and LEAVE HER CHILDREN WITH YOU?:uhoh21: WARNING RED FLAG RED FLAG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I say that because I can't imagine why she needs to do that. Her family lives in AZ so she can get help with the kids if she works nights or weekends. Nope instead she would rather leave the kids with you. What are you going to do when you have duty on the weekends or evenings? God forbid you get deployed I bet she has to take the kids then.

    To be honest we have no idea what your marital problems are. The fact that she has not gone to counseling yet does not mean anything to me. Who knows you might be physically and/or emotionally abusive and she is just done with you. However, if that was the case I don't see any mother leaving her kids with someone like that.

    I am not trying to beat up on your wife it is just that I only have biased info to go off of. Take a look at the full picture and do what is best for your kids.
  8. by   msn2008
    First of all, congratulations on staying sober for one year. I am very proud of you and pray you will have 50+ years of sobriety.

    You need to stay in counseling and continue doing what ever your counselor says, as long as it's legal and moral! (and doesn't transfer your addictive personality to another addiction)

    Your wife needs counseling for herself! It's great that she goes with you to work on your couple isssues, but she has many issues that need to be addressed without you in the room!

    Question: how are the kids? Do they know? Are they in counseling?

    Prepare yourself for the possibility that your wife returned to school to give herself the option to leave you when she graduates. Again, I don't know you or your circumstances, but they hit pretty close to home, if you know what I mean.

    I appreciate your candor and transparency, especially regarding the most difficult addiction there is. It also has the largest number of addicts. I am so glad you are an ex-addict now!

    Know that many who read this forum are cheering you on from the side lines and praying your marriage survives.
  9. by   bargainhound
    www.salary.com will give your wife idea if she is getting offer of pay
    that is appropriate for the area.

    Lots of hospitals offer nursing grads and students money to pay for
    the debt they incurred during nursing school...........help the pay off
    their education debt by working for them...........get pay plus the
    bonuses. It is something to consider.........see if it is worth it
    to take it. She could probably find something like that where you
    all live now.
  10. by   SummerGarden
    Hi, I have to agree with the other posters that your wife is finding an excuse not to be with you. Most places outside of CA do not pay new grads much more then 18-20/hr. Some might pay 21-22, but that is it.. including Arizona. Check www.salary.com.

    My hubby is Active Duty as well. The place we are stationed only has a CC. I have two degrees and so I qualify to attend an Accelerated BSN program or a MSN program if I pick up the kids and move. Those are not options for me even if I could get a full ride scholarship. Moving would hurt him and me.

    Every year since we have been married he has been deployed 6-8 months out of the year. However, the idea of me being in the home we bought together makes him feel better when he is away. The idea of coming back to an empty house because I took the kids and went to school away from him, saddens him and thus saddens me.

    I hope you continue with counseling and receiving the help you need. But it sounds like your wife is finished with your marriage. She probably cannot get over the 14 years of living with your addiction. She is also probably making excuses she thinks you will believe inorder to leave without hurting your feelings too much.

    I would also like to add that many women go into nursing because the pay is enough to live on one income and leave bad marriages. Many people on here can probably tell you of at least 5 student nurses they knew or know that chose a nursing career to leave a bad relationship. So, you might want to take that into consideration. This may not be the case for her, but it would not surprise me if that was her intention from the beginning. Good luck.
  11. by   KScott
    Luke AFB in AZ is a pretty nice place and you would be able to use your retirement benefits there. (We do.) If I were your wife, I'd apply where-ever I thought I might want to work and see which opportunities present themselves.

    I hope things work out between you two. Good luck.
  12. by   retrvrman
    I guess most of y'all of probably right. We have three kids. Our oldest has cerebral palsy, is 12yrs old in 7th grade, makes straight A's, is in a normal class, but cannot walk on her own, she drives a powered wheelchair. Our younger daughter is 11yrs old and is in 6th grade. She is the middle child. Our son is 7yrs old and he has been diagnosed with childhood onset bipolar disorder. He is on abilify and lithium. I have asked her straight up, are you using me as a meal ticket so you can finish nursing school? She can not finish school without my support. Yes, my 14yrs sex addiction have caused her tremendous pain, hurt, anger, shame but according to our counselor she has alot of co-dependecy issues and is what they call a "love addict". I just want her to been "honest" and up front with me so I can move on with my life. I don't want to set myself up or have any false hopes. I have told her that all I want is for us to be totally honest with each other during all of this. No lies, no deception....I also have told her that I do still love her and that I will support her thru nursing school just like I have since she started. I really don't feel that she is going to be able to own her stuff and all the core issues that she has until she doesn go to counseling for herself without me. She has some names of some counselors but she has not called anyone. I feel that she is scared too...but I realize that only she can fix or take care of her and I can not. The other thing that is probably the most important issue is that we are not right now on the same spiritual level. I am working on my relationship with God and getting closer to him. I have been going back to church for a year now, she has not been, I have taken our kids. She doesn't like to talk to me about religion. I heard her talking to her mother the other day about religion and she was asking how is it that Jewish folks are Gods chosen people? She said that she doesn't believe in denominations that say you have to speak in tongues to be saved or that you have to be baptised, etc. She says and her mom does that she is saved and believes that jesus christ died on the cross for our sins, but she also says that she is a live let live type of person and that she does believe in morals and the Ten commandments, one of which is thou shall not committ adultry. I really feel because we do not communicate together on a spiritual level that is why we are still so distant.
  13. by   1st edition
    I admire your support! You sound like a great guy who is really trying to support his wife! Go to Salary.com and you can get salary info on anywhere u want. Look in the back of nursing magazines, your wife can get them at her school library, and there are plenty of job offers for CO, and AZ there. I just saw one ad that offered $85,000/yr, $5000 relocation allowance, $3000 sign-on bonus in Phoenix. Can't find the mag tho!

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