Manic and Addicted Nurse Manager

  1. 0
    Help!

    My nurse manager (a new job) is manic, passive-aggressive and spent the entire morning on the phone yelling with loud, pressured speech at her Dr. office demanding Xanax and stating that she is not a substance abuser and they have insulted her over and over and over. This included yelling in the office that her son is in jail for substance abuse, etc., etc.

    She is totally out of control and even threw an assessment I was working on in the garbage can.

    Unfortunately, she is also has many other problems.

    She is a terrible bully and has made it impossible for me to do my job.

    There have been several incidents of patient issues being neglected due to her illness.

    She needs to be reported to the impaired nursing program and I am too weak to report her.

    All suggestions will be appreciated.
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  4. 23 Comments so far...

  5. 5
    This sounds horrible, but because I have a problem with being blunt, my first thought was "Put on your big girl underwear and do something"

    What other option do you have? Convince someone else to report her? Get another job, but still leave the patients in danger? Do nothing?

    You should make notes of what happens, when it happens, and do something. Maybe you can do it anonymously, or do it with a group of coworkers, but the point is...you have to do something. If you don't at least try, and something bad happens, your just as guilty. Maybe not legally, but ethically....
  6. 4
    slip a detailed letter under the DON's door...
    with a cc to adon and hr.
    it is not up to you or anyone else, to report her to impaired nurses or any other program.
    an investigation needs to be done first.

    please get strong enough to do this, for the sake of all the pts...
    immediately.

    leslie
    freefalr, nursel56, emsboss, and 1 other like this.
  7. 0
    Quote from leslie :-D
    slip a detailed letter under the DON's door...
    with a cc to adon and hr.
    it is not up to you or anyone else, to report her to impaired nurses or any other program.
    an investigation needs to be done first.

    please get strong enough to do this, for the sake of all the pts...
    immediately.

    leslie
    She is the DON, I am second in line.

    I am terrified of the retaliation.

    The owners of the agency "love" her and are easily manipulated by her, she can be very destructive to others.

    If I report her to the impaired nurse program in my area, I will have to find another job and will probably will not be able to do so. I spent some time just a couple of days ago talking with a very talented nurse who is having trouble finding work.

    The right thing to do is to report this person, she needs help and others need to be protected.

    AND the right thing to do is not end up jobless and homeless.

    I am not necessarily weak, I am in a weak position.

    If I could find another job tomorrow, I would report her.

    The agency is troubled and I was brought in to "clean up". The impaired DON is to blame, but is very threatened and has run off many consultants and other nurses who have attempted to do my job. She prefers to surround herself with others who have substandard quality of work.

    She is very good at destroying others.

    I am not out to destroy anyone here at all, especially myself.

    This is where the weakness is. I hope I am making sense. I have been verbally and emotionally abused beyond imagination by this person.
  8. 0
    Quote from proudnurseRN
    This sounds horrible, but because I have a problem with being blunt, my first thought was "Put on your big girl underwear and do something"

    What other option do you have? Convince someone else to report her? Get another job, but still leave the patients in danger? Do nothing?

    You should make notes of what happens, when it happens, and do something. Maybe you can do it anonymously, or do it with a group of coworkers, but the point is...you have to do something. If you don't at least try, and something bad happens, your just as guilty. Maybe not legally, but ethically....
    I am not necessarily weak, but I am in a weak position. I have the notes and they are doozies. This person is the DON and I am the next in line. I have only worked there a short time, and was brought in to "clean up" a terrible mess. I have found things that put the agency in a bad position. The owners of the agency originally offered me her job and stated that she is "retiring". I turned it down because I do not want to be a DON.

    If I could find another job, I would report her in a heartbeat to the impaired professional program where she could be handled appropriately. This is probably a dual diagnosis: chemical dependency and mental illness. I can't diagnose, of course, but the symptoms are very clear. She could also be having side effects from some meds she is taking. In any case she needs help.

    Due to the evil type of things this person has done to me with her extreme passive aggressive, bully type behavior, I am in need of protection from retaliation.

    I need my job and my paycheck. I am in a difficult position and I feel like I need to go to a safe house - no kidding.

    There is no underwear to make me into a big girl, it's like a no way out situation.

    The solution is outside of the box somewhere and I can't find it.

    Thanks for giving me a dose of humor.
  9. 0
    Okay, well then I will have to restate my advice. Your original post made it sound like you were just scared to report her. Tough situation there. Surely someone out there has a similiar situation and can offer some advice, because I'm stuck. The only thing I keep thinking is if you report her, do you have to give your name?
  10. 4
    Quote from erroridiot
    The owners of the agency "love" her and are easily manipulated by her, she can be very destructive to others.
    Quote from erroridiot
    The owners of the agency originally offered me her job and stated that she is "retiring". I turned it down because I do not want to be a DON.
    how come they offered you her job?
    i wonder if the DON even knows they did this.
    am also wondering if perhaps they are intimidated by this whacko, and lack the fortitude to fire her?

    why won't you report her to your BON?
    you can do so anonymously.
    if you opt to do this (which you really need to), be as detailed as possible.
    give concrete examples of all your concerns.
    please do this immediately.

    in the meantime, why won't you have a 1:1 with corporate?
    afterall, they hired you to fix things around there.
    they need to know why everything is in such a state of disrepair.
    (even though i'm thinking they DO know but are behaving incredibly passive-aggressie themselves)
    but the bottom line is you were hired for a certain reason, and it's your responsibility to let your employer
    know what's going on...
    as well as sharing your fears about being terminated.
    i wouldn't be a bit surprised to learn that the owners and you are likely on the same page about her.

    much luck to you.
    let us know how it goes.

    leslie
    freefalr, Ivanna_Nurse, psalm, and 1 other like this.
  11. 1
    What do the rest of the staff members think?

    There is safety in numbers. There is no reason you have to handle this situation all by yourself. Address it as a group.
    canoehead likes this.
  12. 0
    I am glad that I am not in your position. I believe Leslie gave you some good advice. You should decide how to go about reporting this situation, or decide to clam up, and just keep the job as long as it lasts under these circumstances. At any rate, you may find yourself on the outside looking in, sooner or later.
  13. 0
    Quote from leslie :-D
    how come they offered you her job?
    i wonder if the DON even knows they did this.
    am also wondering if perhaps they are intimidated by this whacko, and lack the fortitude to fire her?

    why won't you report her to your BON?
    you can do so anonymously.
    if you opt to do this (which you really need to), be as detailed as possible.
    give concrete examples of all your concerns.
    please do this immediately.

    in the meantime, why won't you have a 1:1 with corporate?
    afterall, they hired you to fix things around there.
    they need to know why everything is in such a state of disrepair.
    (even though i'm thinking they DO know but are behaving incredibly passive-aggressie themselves)
    but the bottom line is you were hired for a certain reason, and it's your responsibility to let your employer
    know what's going on...
    as well as sharing your fears about being terminated.
    i wouldn't be a bit surprised to learn that the owners and you are likely on the same page about her.

    much luck to you.
    let us know how it goes.

    leslie
    I do not believe that I need to give my name to the impaired professional program. I have never reported anyone to the program and I know someone affiliated with the program.


    I don't think I will need to report my name to the impaired professional program. If I do, I believe it can be kept confidential.

    However, the owners of the agency (it is a small agency) will likely be involved in some questioning about her work performance and I will immediately be suspect by them. This agency is probably not financially viable (I have reviewed a lot of their records) and for numerous reasons I will need to find another job anyway, at some time in the future. The owners are not medical professionals. They do not realize the extent of the problem this person has created due to her illness and general incompetence or they are in denial.

    In fact, I will say that the owners of the agency have been cruel to me and have given me an ultimatum to clean up hundreds if not thousands of errors within about 5 weeks when their survey is due. To hire someone and order them to clean up a couple of years worth of problems is beyond cruel. If the survey does not go well, I am sure they will find me to be disposable. I have only been there a couple of weeks.

    The manic DON is constantly badmouthing me very loudly and has set me up repeatedly. She is so loud that I can not even think to do any work. I can not believe how skilled she is at setting people up. On top of the Xanax, she takes breaks to smoke as often as every 30 minutes.

    Thanks so much for your reply, and for listening. I don't expect any easy answer to the situation.


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