If For One More Day.......

Shantas · Nov 28, 2007

It would be my dad, I was 16 when he passed away....I was an unplanned pregnancy. In the country where I was born girls were liability, so many people told my dad that it was sad that he had another girl. My dad told them "dont worry, my baby girl will take care of me when I get old"....I feel sad that my dad did not live to see me become a nurse and I was not able to take care of him the way I take care of my patients.....but I know he is watching over me and always:)

berniemcr · Nov 28, 2007

I have so often wished Ihad one more day or even one more hour.

If I could chose only one person it would be my eldest daughter who died 5 years ago at the age of 29. We were estranged over her life style but she knew I would help her when she was ready to change. I know she wanted to--she sent me a card a week before she died and told me she would be well soon. I just really want to hold her one more time and tell her how much I loved her and how sorry I am.

If I could be greedy, I would ask to see my Dad who died 13 years ago and sank into a coma so fast that I never know if he heard me say good by. Also, my Mom who died 8 years ago who had had a stroke and who seemed to appear angry with me when she realized she wasn't going to get better in the rehab. I think back and realize maybe I could have brought her to my apartment and had caregivers for her but although she couldn't speak and I was unsure what she understood, I think she thought she would get better at the rehab.

Long and rambling but a subject close to my heart with what I would do with "one more day". At my pinning I thought of them and how proud they would have been that I became a nurse at 57. I really miss them.

bethin · Nov 28, 2007

If for one more day you had the chance to reconnect with a loved one that has passed, who would it be and why.

I know I'll be in the minority, but I'd have to decline.

If I knew that I only had a day, that whole day I would be thinking that I only had 8 hours to go, 7 hours to go, etc. I wouldn't be able to enjoy myself. Although, it would be very interesting to get their thoughts on how I'm living my life.

psalm, RN · Nov 28, 2007

This may sound stupid but this is what I would do...I would want to spend the day with my dearly departed feline. She spoke in sentences,she could say "Mama", she got me thru nursing school, she gave me unconditional love when my world was falling apart, she renewed my faith in God (she would sit on my lap when I read my Bible and purr...if she saw me lift my Bible she knew it was quiet time/purr time), she brought a mouse when I hosted a potluck for my Bible study group, she talked back to the neighbors, she slept under the covers curled up with me or wrapped around my head, she knew my moods, she'd protect me from people who were strangers to her, she was something else. To hear her funny words, to feel her complete abandon against me as we slept, to hear her purr again. She gave us eight years of love and fun and numerous mousies, chipmonks, squirrels, snakes, moles, rabbits, birds, dragon flies(hey this is cool, wonder if Mama will like it!), and she'd save the best for me...the innards, bowels, liver, etc.

She shared her time, walking down to the neighborhood daycare and look in the window at the children and talk to them. When the daycare kids were on their walks and we were outside, she would accomodate them by letting multiple little hands pet her simultaneously. She believed in community.

She loved to follow Papa around, esp. when he was on the ladder. He'd have to put both up so she would stay off his. She'd open doors, soothe jagged nerves with a cuddle, help Papa dig in the garden, talk to our teen-ager during a rough spot...didn't know if she was scolding or counseling, but he benefitted from her talks.

When I had to take her to Purdue Small Animal Clinic at Purdue University (from our home in Michigan) for surgery, she was the talk of the clinic. Everyone had to visit this very vocal kitty who would discuss her treatment plans and have the final meow, er, say in it. When the vets would give me daily updates I was always encouraged at their kind words on her vibrant personality and her will to survive. When she passed here with us, it took hours before I could release her little body to my husband for her final resting place. I didn't want her to get cold. Months later I considered professional help for my grief.

So maybe it is stupid, but that would be what I would want.

berniemcr · Nov 29, 2007

Psalm--I certainly don't think wishing for more time with your pet is stupid. I love the "Rainbow Bridge" story that speaks of us being greeted by our loving pets after death--wouldn't that be wonderful?

There were times in my life when my family was fractured and my children and I couldn't talk about all that was bothering us. There was anger, hurt and pain. Through this I found that one of our many pets would do something silly and we would all laugh. We couldn't talk-but we could laugh together. My grown children and I have spoken of the importance of those times. Laughing would always lead to some talking.

I have had and still do many dogs and cats in my life and I miss them all when they are gone.

bethin · Nov 29, 2007

psalm, I don't think that's stupid. Obviously she was more than just a cat to you. She was a part of the family. I'm not a cat person, but when my dog Millie died after having her pups, I cried for weeks. I would drive down the road, see a dog like her and stop, thinking that she was alive and lost.

CardioTrans, BSN, RN · Nov 29, 2007

The movie will be on ABC on Dec 9 at 8pm central time if anyone would like to see it.

If you haven't read the book I HIGHLY recommend it!

lisamaree · Dec 1, 2007

My friend, who commited suicide just over a year ago.

I hadnt seen him for awhile when I found out he'd died, but it hit hard - we were in the same group of friends as teenagers and we worked together at our first after school jobs. His best friend was my first boyfriend, and he dated my friend.

If I could see him, I'd tell him how much we all miss him and his cheeky sense of humour. I wonder if he could explain what possibly made him feel there was no other way out. I'd tell him just how much it hurt to say goodbye for one final time.

I'd tell him about all I've achieved in the time since I'd seen him last.

I wore my nursing uniform to his funeral because I had to attend my clinical placement that afternoon, and because I knew he'd never have the chance to see me in it.

I think of him almost every day and hope he is in a good place.