I have a negative attitude - I must leave

[Rapheal]

I have been in med-surg night shift for 7 months. When I started I knew that I would feel reality shock and this would improve as my skills grew. Well it has been 7 months and I hate my job. I have a sick stomach every day I work and many times the days I do not. I dread going in to work.

First they took the aides away. Next they took away the phlebotamists. Then pharmacy closed after 3 pm. We now have only 1 respiratory therapist for the whole hospital. I work mostly with agency nurses. 2 new RN orientees left before a week had passed. The telemetry techs frequently leave the monitors unmanned while they take frequent breaks. The new trend has also been to admit psych patients, alchoholic patients and IV drug users without any sitters even though they are going through withdrawl or are wandering into other patient rooms or hanging around the medication carts. Management has said that we need to do more with less.

Yesterday a DNR-CCA patient died at 7 am. The attitude of the day shift staff was - hurry up and give me report - I am getting a late start. I wanted to clean the patient up before his son got there because he was on the way. My friend on day shift told me hospital nursing is like this everywhere. I hope this is not true. I have been offered a job in LTC. The facility is nice, they are well staffed, the patients look clean. During my interview they showed me around and the residents kept telling me how nice the nurses were and how they were happy here.

I love the patients on med-surg and love learning involved in dealing with these patients. Is med-surg like this everywhere? Should I make the move to LTC? I fear that I may soon lose it and yell at the next tele-tech who leaves the desk when my patient is in SVT or tell the nursing supervisor " There are 2 new patients in rooms on my floor - I have not received, report, have not been told they were coming- you come here and take care of them because I do not have the time and will not do it". This will undoubtedly leave me unemployed.

I feel hateful. My attitude has hit rock bottom. Thanks for letting me vent and please tell me if I am just not cut out to be a nurse. The patients say nice things about me so I know I can not be a bad person. Maybe just not cut out for nursing.

[bsnecu99]

Honey, I feel exactly the same way. As a new grad I worked neuromed with a manager who never wanted me from the get go and made it her God-given right to destroy me emotionally and professionally. After 16 months, I had to quit. Went to a LTC and after a year they took my vacation away and had me work 7 double shifts in a row. Went to Beverly health care (run like hell if you hear that name) and was expected to take care of 78 patients alone 7p-7a including a 600 pound woman who had gone into respiratory arrest from a UTI earlier that day. Needless to say, I quit last night. Please do not even think about LTC until you check their on-call policy, call out policy, and vacation policy. Patient ratio and acuity is equally important. God luck.

[bsnecu99]

QueenieRN, please don't be so sanctimonious in thinking that any of us nurses will EVER make a change with managment who have been told "find someone who can work the entire hospital, LTC, doc office or whatever" alone. I have faced 78 LTC patients alone with a 30-35% acuity rate. Plus the UTI rate was over 60%. I did my best to try to advocate not only for the patient but for my fellow nurses and ended up quitting in frustration. My license costed me over $10,000 plus lost wages for getting a BSN instead of working for K-Mart. And why, to make $12/hr and be treated like a slave? Family members dictate what meds our patients receive and even take it upon themselves to use the Yankauer. It isn't about patient's quality of care, it's about the Benjamin's!

[Hellllllo Nurse, BSN, RN]

Originally posted by Rapheal

Dear QUEENIERN,

Your points are valid and I have made incidence reports. But nobody likes it when the new kid on the block complains. You are considered a troublemaker and all sorts of retaliation accompany that decision. One of the staff nurses told me (confidentially) 3 months ago to stop making waves. She was right. I have had incident reports made against me in retaliation. They were actual lies and I had to defend myself. I learned my lesson because mgmt. is well aware of the problems and will not deal with them.

And truthfully my unit does not desire to change. We have nurses who survived the changes in mgmt. and staff a few years ago and feel very secure in their positions. Some are downright sloppy nurses who stay because they know their ways will not be tolerated anywhere else. They are resistant to change, have developed skills in shifting the blame and are not going anywhere without a fight. They are also willing to work short staffed as long as they can get away with things. So if mgmt. chooses to keep nurses like this and lose nurses like me, that is their choice. I am physically sick almost every day and will not increase my stress level to the point of getting an MI. Yes my patients deserve better and deserve a patient advocate who is willing to fight the war for them. But my kids need a mommy, my husband needs a wife, and I need to treat myself better than this. So I will speak with my feet. Maybe this is not good enough but it is the best than I can do at this point in my life.

You go, girl! We need more nurses like you.

[CseMgr1, ASN, RN]

Originally posted by Rapheal

***************Update******************]

I've accepted the other position. I am leaving med-surg. I hope to go PRN if they let me. If not- well that's their choice. We lost 2 more nurses in the last two weeks and one has been on sick leave for weeks now and is not on the next schedule.

Thanks for all the advice and encouragement. The last night I worked I walked into: A patient on a nitro drip with no tele (against protocol-but still there it was), an irate family member who wanted to talk to her husband's nurse, a patient who was SOB with a panic ABG (they just handed me the paper with a real short explanation), 3 patient's in restraints and only one with a current restraint order, and we were short a nurse until an agency nurse arrived. Did they send help? No. I was expected to address all these issues, get vitals and deliver 8 pm meds in a timely fashion. 2 of these patient's were sent to ICU and IMHO they should not have been on med/surg in the first place. I just cannot handle this. So off I go unto what I hope is a better place.

Please pray and /or think a good thought for me and my future. I truly am grateful for all the responses and encouragement.

Want me to come and sing "Happy Trails" for you?

[Mol]

You are definately cut out to be a nurse but get the h--- out before you do or say something that you regret and most importantly before you do burn out.. there are a couple of things that i finally realised. Healthcare is a business, your boss and everyone above her or him do not care and will never care, its all about profit. You will hurt your self only if you stay, i would advise you to move on and even if LTC doesnt work out and trust me it might not, it will have been good experience. Bottom line it will never change until the patient starts speaking up and their isnt any sign of that happening. The girls you worked with are bigger fools, they are 100% liable and i seen a few girls get slapped with lawsuits and let me tell you the hospital wasnt backing any of them.

[barb4575]

Welcome bsnecu99...glad to see you made it to this board to give it a try...I think you will find a great deal of support here. Good luck in your job search!

Barbara

[QUEENIERN]

DEAR KAREN,

I HATE THAT YOU FEEL WE NURSES WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE OR CHANGE. (ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU COULD GO HIGHER IN ADMINISTRATION WITH A BSN). MABE BECAUSE MY FACILITY IS NOT AS BAD AS THE ONE'S I HAVE BEEN READING ABOUT OR THANK GOODNESS A COUPLE OF THE ONES YOU HAVE WORKED, I STILL HAVE A LOT OF HOPE FOR CHANGE. ONE THING IS FOR SURE THOUGH IT WILL NOT HAPPEN WITHOUT US TRYING. SO FOR NOW I FEEL FOR MYSELF THAT I MUST KEEP TRYING FOR CHANGE AND DO WHAT I CAN TO BRING THOSE CRITICAL ISSUES TO LIGHT EVEN IF IT DOESN'T WORK OUT FOR ME. I THINK IT IS PART OF MY WAY OF COPING. (I WASN'T THIS WARPED BEFORE NURSING). ANYWAY I APPRECIATE YOUR REPLY. IT IS SO INTERESTING WHAT IS GOING ON IN THE REST OF THE WORLD OF NURSING AND TO LEARN WHAT IS BEING TRIED, WHY IT WORKED OR DIDN'T WORK. I HAVE AREADY USED SEVERAL THINGS TO MY ADVANTAGE OFF OF THIS BOARD. GLAD I FOUND IT.

[Shed13911]

You have endured more than you should have to. You have worked too hard for your lisence to allow management to make you risk losing it. If you cont to work under those conditions and a patient is harmed, you will jeporadize your lisence. You are aware of the unsafe conditions but continued on under those conditions. Management will not back you up. Document, document, document! If your health and mental well being are being put to the max, what are you still doing there? We need good nurses like you so please find another position that has a safe working environment and that you don't dread going in day after day!! Good luck, I will keep you in my prayers!! :blushkiss

[canada]

Keep your chin up............you are a good nurse because you do care and you realize the problem. Don't risk your health and license. MOVE ON. The hospital lawyers will not protect you when the inevitable happens.

[pepperbark]

I have worked in places like what you mentioned. I think we all have because they are everywhere. I now have worked for over 5 years now in a seventh day adventist hospital and I love it. They have a christian atmosphere and everyone that I have worked with is very helpful. Its just a question of finding the right place for you. There are good hospitals and nursing homes out there, you just have to find them.

ESG

[Mazzi]

Time to move on. You sound like a caring nurse. You got your experience so go. That's the great thing about nursing, there are so many different areas of work. I used to be in the same situation but in OB. They took away all our help, handed me a newborn in trouble and said take care of her. Well I got out quick. Your nursing licence is on the line. Don't feel like a failure use it as a learning experience. Good luck!!!

[Teshiee]

Is there any other areas you may be interested in? Before I worked in NICU I did Med Surg and I felt just like you did. I hated the bureaucy that ensued. The patients were fine I couldn't even talk to them about their pain management and other needs because I had 10 patients plus the md hollering for me. I got to the point that I don't think this abuse is worth losing my sanity and I moved on. LTC is no better did that too. Revamping the health care system is must if they want to keep nurses on board. You are human nothing wrong feeling the way you do. You are acknowledging that there is a serious problem on that floor.