Is it easier to juggle family as a nurse or a nursing student??

[wannabecnl]

I'm finishing up my first year of a 2-year nursing program, and I can tell you I've never looked forward to a semester break more than this one! Do they TRY to kill you in nursing school, or is it just an extra feature? (wait, don't answer that yet; I have a bigger question coming...)

A fairly new grad told us at the beginning of our first clinical to hang in there, because it was easier to be an actual nurse than a nursing student. I've held onto that hope these many months, but I'm wondering if that's the case for people with young kids.

I have a 9 year old and a 6 year old, and while I have been blessed to attend most of their crucial events (some divine intervention on timing, I think), I am missing a lot of simple things when I go into my study and shut the door after dinner to do my work. Things like helping with their homework or helping them comb out their hair after a shower, reading a book to my younger daughter before bed, or just sitting with my big girl to talk. We are always together for dinner this semester, at least, but it's not a lot of time before I have to go off to study while my husband (who should get an award for his flexibility and cooking skills!) does all the "mom" stuff I used to do.

Anyway, I'm just wondering if this will really get any easier when I'm working. I know it depends on shifts and such, but at the end of the day when I'm done working, will I have the time and energy to be mom? I have not worked since my kids were born, so maybe school was a baptism by fire compared to "just" going back to work, but maybe my perception is way off base...

BTW, if you DO want to weigh in on the "does the nursing school actually try to kill the students" question, feel free...

[Despareux]

Great thread. As a student nurse, I have wondered the same, and certainly look forward to the end of each quarter [and graduation].

[07302003, ASN, RN]

I've worked evenings 1500-2330, days 0700-1930, and now midnights, and with a 7 year old, I'm loving the quality of life on 3x 1900-0730 midnights, believe it or not. I drive him to school when I get off of work, sleep, pick him up from school, and do homework and dinner. On the weekends I'll sleep longer during the day but I'll at least spend 1-2 hours with him before I go to work.

When I worked 7a-7p days I wouldn't see him for 2 days or more, and it was hard. I'd drag him out of the house at 0620 and he'd be asleep by the time my shift was done and I was out of there. I can be around during the week for school events, I feel like I have a lot more time with him. (And the shift differential and shift bonus are nice too!)

And the pace of midnights is calmer, quieter, less hustle and bustle, more patient focused. You're not dealing with 3 meals, specialists, PT/OT, speech, a lot of tests and the family demanding all of your attention, for the most part.

Best of luck to you, and hang in there!

[07302003, ASN, RN]

Oh yea, and life after nursing school is GREAT! Especially if you work 3 12's. Very easy to compartmentalize life into "4 days off outside of work" and "the three days I work where I don't expect myself to get anything done but to feed myself and get enough sleep". It's awesome to run errands during the week. It's awesome to read the newspaper and a good book. It's amazing to have FREE time, and not feel guilty about what you aren't studying. It is so nice to pick your kids up from school and have quality, relaxed time with them. Four days a week of family time is a blessing.

(And, with the stress of working in a hospital + some of the ugly / stressful things you see and deal with, I'd rather compartmentalize my days off as TOTALLY off and focused on the kid, not go home after 8 hours and do homework and dinner).

[misty720]

Im in nursing school now with no kids and only working 19 hours a week and I'm finding it tough. One girl in my class is a single mom to 3 kids, working full time and is in school full time.Dont know how the hell she does it but everytime I feel overwhelmed and want to complain, I think of her. I have it pretty easy.

[hiddencatRN, BSN, RN]

Families are hard to juggle, period. They are heavy and irregularly shaped.

[NoviceRN10]

Personally for me, being an actual nurse has been harder. Being a nurse isn't harder than being a student, per se, but my new "lifestyle" is difficult. I can only choose the days I work to a point, I work nights and am always exhausted when I am not working. I work three 12 hr shifts a week, but I am useless at home 6 days out of 7. I feel more disconnected from my family than I did while I was in nursing school . I have four kids 10 and under who are going to remember me as a tired, crabby, ***** . Being a nurse is nothing like I imagined it would be. You are a hostess, waitress, housekeeper, teacher, counselor, pill pusher, fetcher, etc on top of wound care, assessments, and documenting. The responsibility is enormous (at least for me, the first few months were overwhelming). I need to figure out how to fit in some quality time with my kids, and how to take care of myself better before I burn myself completely out. The transition has been hard for me, but then I might be a special case .