What attracted me to nursing was that I would be given a job with many immediate tasks and where I would be engaged verbally and physically on a regular basis. Being detail oriented, it also seemed to be a profession in which this tendency would be better utilized. I also feel more articulate than most and am very clear in communicating with others. A lot of these assets should show in my knowledge of pharmacology, an ability to answer patient's questions more completely and in the quality and comprehensiveness of my documentation.
It's also nice to find a field in which the work I do matters more than it would in another profession. I know most every position serves a purpose, but it is hard to find jobs more meaningful than a nurse's. If there were some metric conceived to determine how crucial a job is to a healthy, functioning society, nursing would be listed up there. That really helps when you're tired of your job and don't feel like working hard anymore (which happens to everyone periodically). People always talk about how difficult nursing is, but for me, thinking of such service jobs as real estate brokerage, where you are held to a performance standard and must also provide emotional labor, how empty would you feel when you when remembering the insignificance of your contribution to the world?
In other words, I need a job with a very clear purpose and which requires immediate focus.
As for my shortcomings-and my criminal record-I can attribute both to years of bullying/absence of social support. I used to be extremely friendly and had started out as an excellent student. But when certain needs aren't met, how can you perform? And what habits are established when you're constantly having to defend yourself/being told you're not wanted. I don't want anyone's pity; I just need to unlearn certain fears which unconsciously transformed me into a sarcastic, seemingly unfriendly person who assumes no one will appreciate his touch or his company. I have very rewarding relationships in my life and a healthy social life, but my history coupled with many job failures during the years of drug abuse (guess why I began using!) have instilled a great degree of professional and social anxiety in a job which requires human interaction and professionalism more than most.
But I am young, I am happy and I have a goal in mind. I know I can learn overtime; maybe more quickly than I realize. My worry is that it might not happen as immediately as would be necessary to show my clients and my supervisors my actual abilities. I don't want to shoot myself in the foot!
If anyone has any anecdotes about overcoming their own fears and bad habits when beginning to care for patients, I would appreciate your sharing them with us!
Quote from TheMoonisMyLantern
I say this a lot, but it really bears a lot of truth, in nursing it is not about YOU it is about THEM, say that to yourself whenever you're stressing whenever you don't know how to handle whatever it is that's going to be thrown at you and believe it or not that one little phrase will help to empower you to overcome.
Thanks for this succinct and universally useful advice.