I feel the exact same way you do. I doubt myself constantly even though everyone tells me I do a great job. I make good grades, get good marks in clinical, have had my clinical paperwork used for examples to the NLN accreditors, I work as an intern, etc... but yes the responsibility scares me to death! lol But I think it's a GOOD thing to be nervous.
I was really scared to graduate but now I'm feeling excited because I think I'm ready to get "on with it" and start to get my groove down. Clinicals feel so frustrating because we are 10 students to 1 instructor. Everything is "hurry up and wait" I am very excited to work with a preceptor one on one so that they can confirm my clinical judgements. For instance with assessments. I ALWAYS doubt my assessing!
In clinical this week my pt has practically nonexistant pedal pulses. I "thought" I was feeeling them intermittant and for my first assessment I rated them 1+. for my 2nd assessment I felt maybe I was imagining them so I got the doppler. A fellow student who happens to be an LPN checked them and said "I agree, they are super weak but they ARE there intermittantly..quit doubting yourself!" So I think it will be sooo much better to be working with a preceptor who can help you determine if you are judging things correctly and can help guide you because you are working with the same pts... I just don't think you can get much of that with an instructor doing med passes with 10 students.
The nurses I work with tell me I am doing fine and it will all come together when I am using it all the time. I trust them and I feel that is what orientation is for...to bring everything you have learned together. And the learning won't stop.... you will be more focused though on one unit and can learn what are the common meds for that unit, where everything is, what the common disease processes are...and you can hone in on those things.
The hard part of nursing school
is JUST when you get a comfort level you rotate, new floor, new diseases, new nurses, new instructor, etc. I'm ready to settle down and dive in and learn my specialty area.
My future nurse manager said "we will teach you a lot more. We don't expect you to know it all and have it all figured out. What I do expect is for you to work hard to learn. The first time you have a certain type patient you will have to go and study that and read about it, but I want you to be able to apply that the next time you have that type of patient"
but yea, being a little scared is a good thing! Gotta stay on our toes at all times!