Your last day in the ER, what will you say to some of those patients, who ask the stupidest quetions. What would you like to say when there is no more fear of getting into trouble.
Q. pt asks how long is the wait.
A. Hang around and find out,duhhhhhh
Q what is the doctor going to do????
A. whatever it is, I am sure you desreve it
Q. Do I have to wait much longer
A no, you can leave anytime you want
Q is it going to hurt
A Im sure it is.
Q how much longer before I get called back
A there is a 30 minute penalty everytime you ask me that question.
Q. Will my cut leave a scar
A yes, duhhhhhhh
Q. How long before I get my shot
A I am waiting for it to be delivered from Egypt
Q how do I take this pill
A rectally
Q how do I take this suppositiry
A orally
Q do you take my insurance
A if I say no will you go away
Q I know the sign says no cell phones back here, does
that include me?????
A YES, who did you think it meant, dummie!!!!
Q everytime I turn around to look at my heart monitor it jumps all over the place, am I all right.
A, No !! its trying to tell you that if you move again you will die certainly.
Q is he going to be able to play soccer.
A, I dont know can he now.
What gems have you ever thought of saying, to some of the questions pts ask.
