Help! The ER "Bully" got me!

[Party-of-Five-NY]

Hi, I'm hoping to get advice regarding a situation that occured last week in our ER. Background, I am a fairly new nurse, almost 2 years out of school. I worked one year on med/surg. then accepted a position in the ER. I started in the ER in October, and precepted for about 10 weeks, (I work part-time).

Last week, the known, nasty, ER bully, whose been a nurse there for 17 years, took over my team at 3 PM. The next day, she proceded to announce to the staff, including 3 nurses, and the unit secretary, how awful my documentation was, and went on and on how she couldn't believe how bad it was. Mind you, I did have a rough day and admit that my charting WAS lacking.

I was informed of this incident by my charge nurse, who upon hearing this nurse rant about me, immediately stopped her, and took her aside to reprimand her. I should also mention that this nurse was also one of my preceptors.

Should I confront this evil witch, or just let it roll off my back? The charge nurse did intervene on my behalf, but I don't know how I can go on and work with her, as if nothing happened. On the other hand, everyone else puts up with her because they don't want to deal with her.

What do you suggest? Should I send a letter to the dept. manager, just to keep on file, in case this continues?

I'm open to suggestions.

[loricatus]

I think that if she were to start in again about your charting, you should just reply out loud-"Hey, I am only as good as I was taught by my preceptor, I am just doing it the way you taught me to!" And, just leave it at that. Reverse humiliation, as I like to think of it.

As others have stated, this person's behavior is being condoned because she is still there after all these years. You would probably be considered the expendable one if you were to make a formal issue of it. Standing up to a bully can either lead to the bullying ceasing, or an outright attack on you. May be best to find out which way it will go before you invest much more time and energy in that place.

[UP Nurse]

Some hospitals, including ours, have horizonal violence committees that also deal with this kind of behavior. If this nurse has been there for 17 years, management are aware of their behavior and are allowing it. I would also suggest the book, "Dealing With Difficult People." Unfortunately every emergency department I've worked in, has one of these people. Never could figure why....they just do.

UP Nurse

[Anagray, BSN]

Hi. I am really sorry for what you are going through and I have to say that I have been in a similar situation. I was very uspet for weeks and you know what, it does not matter in the end. Obviously, if this person has worked there for 20 years they know about her behavior and management is probably tolerating it.

My advice is, unless this person is seriously harrassing you all the time say nothing and do nothing, because when she is done with you, she will find another person to move on to. The only thing you can do is make sure your patients are well taken care of and get up to par on your documentation, so noone can say anything. Try to do the most perfect job that you can. Find a resource person who will guide you and answer your questions.

I feel it is a losing battle to fight with a person like that, because it will only cause you distress and make you feel insecure even more.

Unfortunately, every place has people like that and most of the time there is not much that can be done. I'm sure everything is going to blow over, have a glass of wine.

good luck! Nat

[bollweevil]

What exactly would a letter to the dept. manager say? That this nurse pointed out deficiencies in your documentation which you acknowledge were there on that particular day?

Is she a witch? Probably. Let it roll off your back. If you could have been there you could have stood up for yourself and nipped that conversation in the bud, but you weren't there at the time.

Unfortunately not everyone plays nice. Just don't get sucked into the game.

The letter would say that she announced it aloud to a bunch of people who had no need to know and that she apparently didn't do a great job of orienting the victim. If the griper had a beef, she should have spoken privately to the OP, not badmouthed her to the whole ER.

[bollweevil]

Don't confront this bully. It will get you nowhere. I would talk to my CN (the one who informed you of the incident) and find out if it was passed up the line to management. If not, ask that s/he tell your NM what happened. I also don't see where writing a letter to your NM is going to help. You didn't hear her say anything, you just heard from other people that she was talking about you. What would a letter say? "Annie was saying mean things about me behind my back." If this person has been there for 17 years, I guarantee they know what the deal is with her attitude and either don't care or don't want to rock the boat. I hope your attitude towards this nurse has changed - no fake niceties or anything, just be professional and end it there.

If you want something done, request a meeting with your NM to talk about this. You seem quite well-spoken and I'm sure would be able to conduct yourself accordingly.

Management might not know about this long-standing problem person, as the current manager might be quite new there.

The OP does seem well-spoken and strong and she has received a lot of good advice here. Whether she decides to let it ride or pursue it now is up to her and will depend, I think, on how much oomph she's got. Whatever route she chooses, I wish her well. I think she will pursue it.

[Altra, BSN, RN]

If the griper had a beef, she should have spoken privately to the OP, not badmouthed her to the whole ER.

I wholeheartedly agree.

I just disagree that running to the manager is the right reaction.

[rgroyer1RNBSN, BSN, RN]

This is unacceptable! Im a Nursing House Supervisor, this would be enough for me personally to write her butt up! She should not have did this in public, and she oughtta be happy Im not her Supervisor, I would write her up for hippa violation, creating a hostile work enviroment/horizontal violence, and verbally abusing another staff member, talk to the NM or HS immediately, do not take this abuse, I wouldnt!

[morte, LPN, LVN]

This is unacceptable! Im a Nursing House Supervisor, this would be enough for me personally to write her butt up! She should not have did this in public, and she oughtta be happy Im not her Supervisor, I would write her up for hippa violation, creating a hostile work enviroment/horizontal violence, and verbally abusing another staff member, talk to the NM or HS immediately, do not take this abuse, I wouldnt!

i was wondering why no one else saw this as a potential HIPAA violation...as i mentioned earlier.....if the nurse had no professional reason, ie no care relationship with those patients, and no longer a preceptor for the new nurse, she had no business accessing those charts.....