Hi Biker nurse..
I can't seem to reply directly to your mail...
I could transfer, even to the facility you mentioned but I do not think it would be any different. It's the way the system is set up. One is actually rewarded for finding other nurses mistakes. If it's your mistake you have to write up a couple of forms, often weeks later and oh boy do they threaten to "have you escorted off the grounds" if you show even the tiniest bit of spine. It's very punitive, not at all used for learning purposes.
I have been written up so many times during the training process for things I had not yet been trained on and no one would show me how to do it so I had to guess. These are little things, little guesses, ie: how to note on a MAR that an inmate returned a med, or a med came in, not life or death things. I would never guess on serious things! But they treat me writing something, say "#42 rec'd 7/10" rather than "7/10, rec'd #42" like I just killed someone! When in fact inmates are often allowed to run out of very serious meds, or sometimes even given the wrong med outright. That is treated like it's the inmates fault. They didn't fill out the right form or they didn't do it in time, or they should have said something when they got a pink pill instead of a white one. Really! These guys are not in here cuz their brain surgeons or are comfortable with things like accountability or responsibility. We miss teaching opportunities every single day with these guys. Mention that and I am laughed at. Teach these guys they say, like it's a joke to even try. They want me to treat these guys badly, no matter at orientation they tell you that you are not here to punish them. The reality is very different.
I have worked in some pretty high stress fields before. But no matter how bad it was at least you and your coworkers were in it together. Not where I am now. It's every man for themselves, and many, many of my coworkers just love to find other's mistakes, especially the new person. They brag on it, talk about it behind your back. It's really horrible some of the things I hear them say about other people, people they are supposed to be on the same team with and I am not popular for refusing to participate in what I consider to be gossip and darn unprofessional. There are 3 new people since I came and I really feel for them.
My biggest beef would be that I put my nursing license on the line every day I go in, and no one cares. "Sign here" someone will day and don't you do it!! It may come back to bite you weeks, or I have heard, even years later. I am expected to supervise others who while they may have been on that job longer are still not nurses and still, don't really give a hoot if they pass the wrong med, borrow meds from other drawers, cut XRs in half, or just plain don't give them. Who is ultimately responsible in court of law, (and inmates do like to sue),.... we are. I am.
And here they pay very well for that. Very, very well. Think about why. Is my licenses worth it? More to the point, is my peace of mind worth it? It's not. I have already given notice. I can't tell you how wonderful it feels.
But maybe it will be different where you are. You never know. From the 3 interviews I have been on so far working at a prison & admitting that it just isn't the kind of nursing you want to do isn't exactly hurting me. The word "integrity" has come up. (My prison has a horrible reputation locally.) In fact, I just got a call back for a second interview at just the kind of place I had in mind when I went to nursing school
. Wish me luck!