Your Start in Life Doesn't Matter as Much as Where You End Up
The 'victim mentality' has been running rampant in society. Even though aspects of my upbringing were dysfunctional, I refused to become a victim. Rather than feel sorry for myself, I took active steps to enrich my life so I could avoid stumbling into the societal ills that plagued my family of origin. Some would say that I succeeded in the face of adversity. Here is a small part of my story.
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My name is _____, and I am a nurse who climbed a series of uphill battles to get to the place where I am today.
I'm a firm believer that your origins in life do not carry nearly as much importance as your present or future. Even if you had a less-than-ideal start during your growing-up years, this upbringing will not necessarily decide your future unless you purposely adopt the mentality of a perpetual victim.
I am the only child of married parents who were in their early twenties at the time of my birth (1981). At the time, my mother was a production line worker at a solar products factory and remained employed at the same job site for more than 24 years. My father was an entry level technician at an electronics company. Although they had no education or formal vocational training beyond the high school level, their combined incomes enabled them to afford extras such as occasional restaurant meals, toys, nice clothes, trips to the hair salon, and day trips.
Fast forward a few years. I was five years old when my father abruptly quit his job at the electronics company that had employed him for eight years. He began abusing alcohol, became addicted to illegal drugs, and no longer wanted anyone to have any authority over him, including workplace supervisors and bosses. It pains me to mention that, during these years, his priority in life revolved around chasing the next high. His behavior became volatile, and sometimes he was downright violent.
Some people would say that letting young children know about household financial difficulties is unacceptable. However, my mother's modest pay was the only source of money, and she really could not hide the fact that the refrigerator was empty. She could not dance around the fact that the telephone service was disconnected. She could not keep secret the one time the electricity had been turned off. She could not withhold the fact that the car was repossessed. She could not conceal the one time when no Christmas presents appeared under the tree.
My father had been out of the labor force for nearly four years when he stopped using drugs and secured employment. However, self-inflicted long term unemployment damaged his career to the point where his next string of jobs were rather menial with low earnings. It was still up to my mother's income to keep the household afloat.
I have a myriad of horrid memories from my early and middle childhood years. However, I feel that my unpleasant experiences strengthened my character in a way nothing else possibly could. During my preteen years I decided that I never wanted to use drugs, be in an unhealthy relationship, or struggle financially. I realized that education was a ticket to a better life.
To keep a long story short, I earned good grades while in school and accepted responsibility for anything that was not going well in my life. I refused to be a victim. As a young adult I sought professional help to address the demons from my past. I obtained marketable job training to lessen the likelihood of slipping into poverty. I imagined myself in a better place, and in a few years, I actually ended up in a better place.
In other words, your start in life doesn't matter as much as where you end up. An optimistic outlook and a proactive approach to handling situations will help you thrive in the face of adversity. You can have almost anything you want out of life as long as you work toward it and keep up the persistence. Good luck to anyone out there who feels trapped in an uphill battle, for you are not stuck unless you choose to be a victim.
