Wednesday October 18th 2023

Tweety, BSN, RN · Oct 18, 2023

Good morning!

Got up at 5:30 which is early but better for my schedule than 10AM. Been doing some cooking. It's a bit chilly in the 50's over night but will be in the upper 70's later.

No Stars In My Eyes · Oct 18, 2023

Mornin' !

I am doing something I haven't been able to do in YEARS: I am sitting up in bed, lounging with my dog and the laptop, having coffee. Nannie will be attended to in an maybe an hour, so my time is my own! Feels weird, but it is nice.

So my sister sent me excerpts from three different articles that explain "Spousal Allowance". Here in NC, it is $60,000, which from what I can gather is some kind of contingency money, but ISN'T a concrete deposit anywhere. So, I 'have' this money (allowance) that I can't use/spend/ pay for things from......But since hubby's 'estate' is pretty much zero, as he didn't own anything in his name.....no vehicle, no property, no anything; no retirement, no nuthin'...... it isn't particularly applicable and so it just doesn't make a heck of a lot of sense in my case. But, OH DARN WELL! I guess it is money that will sit in limbo for a certain amount of time and then BBZZTT! It's gone. I feel like telling the state, "Thanks for nuthin'." I'm sure it must be helpful to some people, but what can I do with 'invisible' money that I can't actually USE? What kind of 'allowance' is that ???

I am going to take a shower and then do the Nannie routine. I 'plan' on doing the dishes and cleaning out the fridge of all the spills in it made by hubby, and ditching the left-overs that can't be used any more. Hope I am inclined to get the fridge done, but we'll see. Later on I will take Nannie and Momo out in the car, go to the bank for some cash (they don't 'do' debit cards anymore) and pick up something for supper. Nannie will enjoy the outing, Momo will be happy just to remain attached to me and not have to be left behind, and we won't require any sitters today.

All for now---

No Stars In My Eyes · Oct 18, 2023

Forget my stated itinerary! HAH! I should never say what I am going to do with my day because things always change. I saw that I had to pay some bills, and sort out a few receipts to enter into the checking logs. I'll mark a few of them indicating what was shared, what was for Nannie and what was for me, just to have it if I need to show BiL/SiL how things are paid for. I can't use any of hubby's SS check that was deposited this past Monday, and willl have to use Nannie's checking account in the meantime. My car payment and the insurance on the car comes out of my checking on the 20th and 21st. Won't have to pay hubby's Medicare supplement payment, which was a horrendous $265.88 per month! And he had a balance on his credit card that I won't have to make any payments for ......a little more than $4,500 (lots of vodka)! YIKES! Changing to his SS check from mine will only net me another $187 which isn't a whole lot, but it's more than I am getting now , and without having to pay his other stuff any more, it will fatten my checking acct considerably......only so I can pay the lawyer and the funeral home with the 'extra' dough without wasting too much time sweating bullets. ( $$ is given and $$ is taken away....as usual! But that's the way of the world, I reckon!) Who knows WHAT the hospital costs will be; it already makes me quiver and quail to think of the thousands I will see on the bill, but maybe his Medicare and Supplement will cover at least a decent amount of it (I hope, but don't expect!)

So my altered itinerary includes paying a few bills, and more laundry, naturally. And I DO plan on washing the dishes and joyfully tossing the old jello boxes. May wait until tomorrow to take Nanny and Momo for a ride....both of them are sleeping. And all of this financial thinking has me "NEAK IN THE WEES" and drained of my momentum.

nursej22, MSN, RN · Oct 18, 2023

Hi. It's been raining off and on, and feels warmish, in the mid 50s. I just got back from a walk with dogs, and got a little sweaty wearing my raincoat. Yesterday was spent cleaning up messes they made Wednesday night. Just when I think they are catching on to pottying outside, they make a mess, kick their feet into it and run around the house. ugh. So stripped the bed including the duvet cover, scrubbed the bathroom tile and hall, and gathered up the dining room rug to take to the laundromat. There is a little brewery across the street, so I treated myself to a small glass and sat and read my book. I am still plodding through Oppenheimer's biography. I played trivia last night, didn't do too bad. We were supposed to go to Tacoma to see a concert, but it was postponed.

Tonight is the Master Gardener graduation, I am supposed to make a dish to take. dh is deciding whether he will go or not.

Stars, I would still keep all receipts that have to do with Nannie. Just throw them in an envelope or shoe box. Regarding Mr. Stars SS, he most likely was paying for his Medicare Part B out of his SS, so you may get a little more than $187. I think when my mom passed, the funeral home actually notified SS, so that your death benefit can help offset the cost of a funeral. That was 20 years ago, so my memory may be fuzzy.

Anyhoo, have a good day, folks.

No Stars In My Eyes · Oct 18, 2023

Financially sunk until my SS check comes in on the 25th. My car payment and car insurance payment are due by automatic withdrawal on the 20th and 21st, and there is not enough money in my checking acct to cover them, so probably I will end up with a deficit for a balance, and I will be unable to do anything about it until the 25th. CRAP! And Nannie's checking acct is extremely low so I can't pay the trash collector's bill due on the 20th. IF there is enough $$ after my SS check comes in and covers whatever minus balance I'll have, maybe I can get the trash bill paid. The water/elec bill is paid by Nannie and due on the 25th, so on the day I get my SS check, I may be able to pay that, too. BiL won't be able to apply for the guardianship until Friday, and I don't know when that will take effect, sooooooo...... // Nannie's SS check will come on the first Wednesday of Nov., and her checking balance needs to be boosted by a LOT, too.

My mind has been functioning on BBBZZZTTT for the past couple of weeks, so I hadn't kept track of spending until today, nor had I obtained the checking balances like I usually would during that time period before. Now I have discovered I had made such terrible decisions by using our checks to cover stuff. Necessary to pay the funeral home. ( I will be owing the lawyer, too, but at least not yet, anyway.) I will make a few calls tomorrow morning to see what I can do to hold off paying on what's due until next week. Maybe they will have pity on me for hubby passing away?

AW-PHOOEY! Maybe the lawyer can pull some payments from the Spousal Allowance? They are both sort of in hubby's name using his first 2 initials....but I think hubby did not switch those bills to his or Nannie's names, because his dad's name had the same 2 initials, and it may be that Nannie never switched them when his dad died so many years ago, and hubby figured 'what-the-heck' because he has the same initials. I have a feeling that's what he did.

Maybe I can throw all the bills, etc, up in the air and the wind will take care of it; OR I can just throw up in a wastebasket. *sigh* I believe it is time for me to take 0.5 mg of Xanax now.

Anybody inclined to pray, please pray like crazy until I can untangle things. Thanks.

Unless something major happens, it is most likely I won't post any more tonight.

Ado Annie, ASN, RN · Oct 19, 2023

The SS death benefit was a whopping $250 or so... It won't cover funeral expenses but could sure help keep the account balance afloat for a few days.

Hubs actually took the initiative today to talk with a local funeral home and the one in Indiana about how we'll handle things when his mom passes. Good to have a plan and know about how much it will cost.

There's a chili cook-off at work Friday and I plan to take something so I need to plan it and visit the grocery.

The weather has been just beautiful. My favorite. Warm but not hot, sunny, bright blue sky, a little cool in the evenings.

Work goes on. I know hospitals everywhere are having financial difficulties, especially small hospitals.