Want to hear from RNs who are leaving the job.

rncountry · Oct 5, 2000

I also want to say thankyou Josh for your condolences. I miss my dad, as I take each step to get this business up and running so many times I think, I have to email dad and let him know how things are going, and then I remember he is not there to read the email. My dad came out of very bad circumstances, went into the navy at 17 without a high school diploma. At some point in the 70's he got his GED, he went through innumerable classes in the service, he was a flight engineer on a P3orian. That is a plane that tracks enemy subs and whatever else the govenment wants it to keep an eye on. In the 80's he went to college, taking night classes to earn his bacholor degree in business, it took him 6 years to complete. In the late 80's he became a master chief, the highest enlisted grade he could attain. Not many get that far. 5 years ago he retired after 33 years, and became a manager of a factory in Millington TN, I can't say it was something he liked particularly because he had trouble adjusting to people who did not come to work if they did not feel like it. He had difficulty telling someone to do something and then not have it done when he expected it to be, we would talk about it, and I'd tease him and say welcome to civilian life dad! However he had great pride in doing his job well, and when he became ill, he was kept on the payroll, full pay, full benefits. In fact the day after his funeral my stepmom received his last paycheck. Contrast that with how I was treated when I wanted some time off to be able to see him. My dad lived by the motto that can't never did anything. I heard it many, many times, and his life reflected that. I think that somehow in the back of my head I thought that he would get through the cancer, he had always overcome anything before. He overcame coming out of a family with an abusive, alcholic father. He survived being put into an orphanage for a year when his mother could not afford to keep him and his siblings after his father left. He recieved beatings from the woman who ran the orphanage, had a broom broke across his back by her, and suffered back trouble for the rest of his life. Yet he was able to go on as an adult, become a decent man and father. We talked about my nursing career many times, he always told me to do what I felt was right, and to not let others get me down. Their problems were their problems, and I should not take on what was truly up to them to figure out. He pushed education, not only because it would get you were you wanted to go, but learning for learnings sake. To broaden you mind and make you a more well rounded person. When I would meet a goal I wanted, he would say Great, now whatta you gonna do in his southern accent. Always believing their should be new goals, new heights to attain, no matter if they were large or small. My parents divorced when I was 8, and I spent many years not seeing my dad, he was in Florida, California, Iceland twice, Spain, Greece, Germany and flying in and out of navy bases throughout the world. At one point I was pretty sure he didn't care if I was around or not, but after he quit flying and became an instructor if he missed the world traveling and he said no, he'd had enough of it, and besides now he could spend some time with his children, and he'd already missed alot. He and my stepmom had adopted the daughter of my stepsister because she is not able to take care of her, and at my dads funeral the pastor spoke of how much he had wanted to be able to give to this young lady, to do for her what he had been unable to do for me and my sister. I spoke to the pastor afterwards and learned of the regrets my dad had regarding the missing years that he had not been able to voice to me or my sister. He was a private man, and did not feel comfortable expressing alot of emotion. What he did do, was be my motivator and my soundboard. He was my advisor and in the later years of our relationship he was my friend as well as my dad, forgive me for going on and on, but I miss him so much it makes me ache inside. I am sometimes too much my fathers daughter in that I sometimes hold my feelings tight, and telling someone about who he was, that he lived and he was worthwhile makes me feel better. Does that make sense? It doesn't really go along with the topic at hand, except when you look at how he was treated by his company when he became ill and how nurses in general are treated when their outside lives interfere with the job they are doing. Thanks for listening to me, and thank you for the condolences. It does mean something to me, even if I don't actually know you. In fact it means even more, because it's nice to know their are nurses out there willing to support on another rather it is work related or not.

josh_RN · Oct 5, 2000

rncountry...you are very welcome. he sounds like he was a very strong willed person. i am sure he will be missed. and as a aside....i understand your dad's frustration about the civilian work ethic. I grew up around military families and around military bases. even though i never served...joined nursing instead of the army..i see the difference in work ethic between people who have served in the military and those who never have. different kind of drive in the workplace. all employers look for military service for a reason.

oramar · Oct 5, 2000

Originally posted by oramar:

Originally posted by josh_RN:
I call it a job because after working 4 years of burn trauma and CICU/SICU I realize now society, doctors and administrators do not really consider nursing a career. I am changing over into networking and electronics. I would like to hear from other nurses or ex-nurses that are now working in other fields. I am curious to know how it is going for you and your families now that you are out of nursing. Has it been as good as I think it will be or have there been problems? Thanks...josh
You can't quite call me the average nurse
who left the profession but I do appreciate the chance to talk about the last two years. If three years ago someone would have told me I would be out of work at age 52 I would have told them they were insane. Nursing had always been tough but I had always managed to hang in there. Then came RESTRUCTURING, DOWNSIZING, PATIENT FOCUSED CARE. What a beeping nightmare! I had a mild health problem that suddenly became a sever health problem. I wanted to retrain but you have to be well to do that. So I just up and quit and stayed at home for the last nine months. Most people do not have the economic option of just sitting at home for nine months. I was lucky to have a husband with a good job, a home that is paid for and no serious bills. It takes nine months to have a baby and it took me nine months to give birth to a new me. When I left I was full of self loathing and feelings of failure. After about three months I started to notice a improvement in my mental health, just this summer I started noticing an improvment in my physical health. Now I am interested in life again and am starting to check into some options. Will I go back into nursing or sign up for retraining? I am not sure of the answer to that question. However, I am starting to look into various options and I am about to make my way back into the world. I owe Brian Short and the people at these boards a big thanks because being able to talk to others in the same situation save my life. I AM NOT KIDDING IT SAVED MY LIFE.

Here is an update. I just took a casual position at a small nursing home that is very close to my home. I can walk there in 30 min and drive there in 5. The pay is not very good but I have been off for 9 months and I got to try something. I interviewed them yesterday. I am not misspeaking, I interviewed them more than they interviewed me. I went over the place with a fine toothcomb. Got the phone number of an employee on the sly and called them at home. I asked a million questions. I like everything about the place except the pay. I think that it is a nice place to work and they a have low turn over. However, I have not worked LTC before and I admit I might be missing somethings. Can anyone give me advice?

[This message has been edited by oramar (edited October 05, 2000).]

karenrndmc · Oct 5, 2000

Hi

I am feeling guilty because I have a wonderful nursing position which I love very much. I traded in my nerve-racking career of a staff nurse for a tranquil position in the Cardiology dept. You can say I found my Nitch in nursing. I was a staff nurse for 7 years before I received my current job, which I have been in for 3 years now. I worked step-down, Telemetry, and ICU in the past. Midnights, Weekends, and Holidays! I had Doctors screaming at me and patients family members "writing me up", I had been pooped on, puked on, and blood splashed in my eye. A 74-year-old confused combative lady even bit me on the boob! I was burnt out and ready to leave the profession! Then, I landed my current position in a emergent cardiology department at a growing hospital only by sheer luck and with Gods blessing (I actually had my resume blessed with holey water by my Priest!). These positions are hard to get and rare to come by. You really have to wait till the nurses retire to get in. But yet after 3 years of a break form the gruel of the floor staff nurse position, I actually miss it and crave the feeling of being, a "real nurse again". I doubt that I will give up my current position, but have looked into filling in a few times a month on the step-down unit in my hospital. Even with all the stress, there is a certain amount of pride that comes with the job. It takes a special person and a strong person (both physcially and mentally) to be a nurse. Does anyone else feel the same way??? karen

Phantom2U · Oct 5, 2000

I like my job, don't love it but like it. I believe it takes a lot of strength in character to be a RN. I would suggest to those who are unhappy to define exactly what is making you feel that way.

Is it the hours you work, your boss, your specialty? There is a nitch out there for everyone you just need to look for it.

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lita1857 · Oct 6, 2000

oramar, please except my apology...I do think your stronger than you think...or maybe now you are after going thru several major experiences in your life.josh_RN keep us posted on the new business, there maybe a wealth of knowledge out here that could help, also potential customers. Have you seen the site ka-ching? it actually shows how to get a business up and running. Best of luck...mcountry ..I'm not exactly sure what to say except your story and tx was incredibly sad! no human should have to choose between family and work. the irony is if they had treated you decently, they would have your skills today!!!