Think I need profesisonal help

Been there,done that, ASN, RN · Aug 14, 2012

Your title said it all. Yes, you need professional help.

And that's OK!

Hospice is a specialty that takes your heart and soul to fulfill your patents needs. Working with patients that are going to die takes an extra -ordianary toll on YOUR mental health.

You've done enough. You have given all you can. You can't do it any more. Six years of death and dying is enough for any one to handle.

Does your agency provide the assitance you need? If not.. you are with the wrong agency.

If you feel you are losing your mind, you are no longer able to assist the hospice patient or the family.

And that's OK!

You have 6 years of home health care.. you can and should move on.

AweSmiles · Aug 14, 2012

Don't feel ashamed or put yourself down for feeling the way you do. It's ok. Your job is a beautiful one and the fact that you've done hospice for 6 years is beautiful. The reason you are taking your work home with you is because you "care". Which is the essence and foundation of being a nurse. Which is probably why you went into hospice in the first place. Just think, of you didn't care, it wouldn't bother you, and you wouldn't think twice about things.

I think you need to go into a different area of nursing. And I know it might be hard to be as stressed as you are right now and have to start looking for another job. So, possibly seek professional help from a psychiatrist and psychologist if you aren't already. They can be tremendous help when you need it most. And if you need someone to talk to, keep coming to the forums on here or you can PM me. Good luck with everything.

MomRN0913 · Aug 14, 2012

Sorry, I think I mislead you guys. I have been a nurse for 6 years, most of my career in ICU. I went out of bedside and back in 4 months ago as a hospice and palliative home care nurse. The profession I think just has me burnt. It is truly mentally and physically exhausting.

Thanks for all the supportive words though. I'm just so tired and stressed and hates when it impacts my daughter.

I am going to get help. When I find time. Just scheduled my cholecystectomy for August 30th.

Sad, I look forward to it almost because it gives me a few days off from work.

Been there,done that, ASN, RN · Aug 15, 2012

What other profession would look forward to a choley? I hope it is a lap and you can recover quickly ..while planning your future.

MomRN0913 · Aug 16, 2012

HAHAHA! It's supposed to be a lap..... hopefully it will not convert to an open..... Knowing my luck....

I have one week exactly off. I am returning on a FRIDAY most likely even though they are willing to write me out as long as I need. They wrote me out until the following monday, but I have seperate sick and vacation.... so I only have enough sick to make it.

I miss my PTO time and Extended Illness Bank.

I think I will be spending much time in bed figuring out my next career move.

DSkelton711 · Aug 16, 2012

I think you def need to start looking at your options. I, too, am having a crisis. I feel so overwhelemed all the time, to anxious to be effective. I also suffer chronic pain for which I was on disability for 2 years. A person shouldn't have to feel like this going to their job. There has got to be some answers for you. Some options. I wish you the best.

MomRN0913 · Aug 16, 2012

I'm sorry you are feeling the same way. On Forbes.com they have a list of the 10 jobs people are unhappiest with. Guess what number 3 is.I did leave the bedside and took a NM job in an LTACh which was H ell. Poorly run company. Then after lovely unemployment, I took some made up position in the Cath lab at a hospital as an outcomes manager. It was an undefined job and I had no clue what I was doing. So I left for this position. Thought I would be happier back with the patients. But the overworking, stress and anxiety is just too much. There is one job I am dying for, me and a few coworkers from my icu job applied for. Some of us got it and some ( me) didn't. Work from home. Write letters. Make your own schedule. Low stress money ok with good benefits.That job would have solved all my problems.

Clementia · Aug 16, 2012

Do get professional help, and get it as soon as possible. Believe me, if you ignore how you're feeling, things will just continue to get worse. I know a little bit about what you're going through; three years ago I burned out badly and tried to soldier through it on my own, without looking for help until things got really horrible. I'm still feeling the repercussions. I know quitting one's job isn't always an option, but don't do what I did. Find someone to talk to and go over your options with. I wish you the best.

Marshall1 · Aug 26, 2012

The choley may be a blessing in disguise..you can get some much needed rest and be relieved of some responsibility for at least a short period of time. I do not have children but have always wondered how people - mostly women- are able to handle/manage working FT and being a FT parent - I know - thousands do it everyday but it does not surprise me you are short tempered and exhausted - you would have to be being a caregiver 24/7, 365 between home and work.

Have you considered working for an insurance company? Or in an outpatient surgery setting?

The PRN medication doesn't sound like its enough..have you considered/spoken w/your doctor about something daily? Like Lexapro or similar that helps w/depression and anxiety? Someone I worked with went on Lexapro several years back for a lot of what you are describing here. For her, medication on a long term, consistent basis, gave her her life back.

I wish you well and hope you are able to move beyond all this and into a more settled, peace filled place.

MomRN0913 · Aug 28, 2012

The choley may be a blessing in disguise..you can get some much needed rest and be relieved of some responsibility for at least a short period of time. I do not have children but have always wondered how people - mostly women- are able to handle/manage working FT and being a FT parent - I know - thousands do it everyday but it does not surprise me you are short tempered and exhausted - you would have to be being a caregiver 24/7, 365 between home and work.
Have you considered working for an insurance company? Or in an outpatient surgery setting?
The PRN medication doesn't sound like its enough..have you considered/spoken w/your doctor about something daily? Like Lexapro or similar that helps w/depression and anxiety? Someone I worked with went on Lexapro several years back for a lot of what you are describing here. For her, medication on a long term, consistent basis, gave her her life back.
I wish you well and hope you are able to move beyond all this and into a more settled, peace filled place.

When my surgery is all over and done with, I already told my PCP that I want to start some anti-depressants. Lexapro I think is a good choice. i was on Effexor for a year after my separation/divorce, but I didnt like the side effects.

I do spread my self thin and have soooo much other emotional issues going on lately, I guess it's burning me out.

Before this I interviewed with an insurance company. Made it through FOUR interviews, the last one being with the VP who gave me praise then a week later I get a rejection letter in the mail. I'll never know what happened.

Surgery is Thursday and I have been "sick" for a week. My body finally got tired, I got laryngitis and now I have a persistent cough for which I am on Advair, Z-pack, Veramyst and Tussinex! Hopefully these will get me through my surgery.

One more day of work. Praying for a decent one.

Thanks for the support. Much needed. I hope maybe an anti-depressant and some therapy will give me a quality of life back:)