Things pts say that make you scratch your head.

[Mommy&RN]

1.) "I am very health conscious, and a bit of a germaphobe"

+ for cocaine.

2.) " I can't breathe, the nebs don't help, I'm allergic to steroids, because they made me swell"

Me: do you feel like your cant catch your breath, or can you not breathe through your nose?

"Can't breathe through my nose." (Sats 97%)

Now, she was wheezy, and I really think a hit of steroids would make her feel a ton better, but I guess breathing is secondary to swelling...

[monkeybug]

Working as a caregiver thru an agency in a private home; My patient was a little old lady whose son and daughter in law lived with her. The son kept trying to give me lists of "chores" to do that had nothing to do with caring for his mother and some where downright dangerous! "Hop on that ladder and finish painting the ceiling like the other half of it! And after you can rearrange the cans in my kitchen cupboards. Mom will be ok for awhile." When I told him, politely that I was only there to help his mother, he goes; "Well, what are you here for then?! Isn't it your job to take care of us?" OMG! I said "I think you are mixing me up with your mother and/or a maid/handyman. None of which I am. Besides, I'm here for your mother. Not you." Goes without saying I asked for another position.

Wow. Just wow. I'm in people's homes all the time, and I honestly don't know how I would handle this!

[smile_through_it]

My confused patient last night told me he just got off the phone with the police because he saw the marijuana I was carrying and he knows I'm selling it.. the 'marijuana' I was carrying were his flowers his daughter brought in for him the day before! :)

[calivianya, BSN, RN]

I have had patients say some crazy things!

Once we had a patient coding down the hall and another patient was constantly on the call bell. He was hungry and wanted something to eat. The nurse finally told him we were all hands on deck helping to save a patient's life and he said, "I don't care if they're dead already; I want a ******* snack!" I couldn't believe it. People are downright evil sometimes. I'm pretty sure a person's life is a lot more important than getting a snack for this guy who just ate dinner 30 minutes ago.