The person I referred at my work turned out the one with bad work ethics

[Toodeep]

Hi,

I am from Toronto, Canada. I am an IEN who went through the process of getting Canadian RN license and have been working in  ICU for 3 years now. One of my relatives who is also an IEN recently migrated to Canada and has been living in the same apartment building as mine. She was looking for a job. My unit was hiring a person support worker. I talked to my manager about her interest in the position. I assumed she would be very grateful for the job and would work with great work ethics. It is hard to find job in Toronto right now and this position not only pays well but also provide best exposure to be oriented to nursing in Canada. It would be an ideal stepping stone position for her nursing career in Canada. Therefore while talking to my manager I kind of said I can guarantee her work ethics which I now feel I shouldn't have said. I had never worked with her and didn't quite know her personally or professionally. My manager ended up hiring her. I was happy for her. 
She has just worked for a few months now. She is doing opposite of what I thought she would do. She shows up to work 5-15 minutes late and leaves early. She hides in a corner and plays with phone at work. What disgusted me the worst was I saw hospital soap, garbage liners and other supplies in her apartment. 
This is a big hospital and our unit is quite big with lots of staff. I am not sure if my manager has seen what I have been seeing. I am wondering what my manager is thinking of me if he has noticed her work attitude. I tried to politely and professionally suggest her not to take job for granted but she didn't take it well. I don't know how to act in this situation. I didn't want to argue. I just referred her; I am not her manager or anything to discipline her. I don't think talking to the manager would be professional either. Should I just let it go? I feel like my manager will never trust my recommendation again. What would you do in this situation. Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks 😊 

 

[JKL33]

Sorry this didn't turn out the way you hoped, very disappointing and maybe somewhat embarrassing too. You have to remember that your relative's behavior and work ethic are her own choices/her problem. I'd probably tend to feel some responsibility for the situation but at the end of the day you connected her with a potential employer and that is all. Your employer had an opportunity to put her through the interview process, check her references, etc. and the responsibility of creating an employment relationship with her. And now, it is their responsibility to monitor and evaluate her performance. If you're the only one noticing someone showing up late and sitting on their phone in a corner while on the clock then your workplace has much bigger problems than just your family member.

You don't say how close a relative this is, or how close your relationship. Were I in your position it would affect the relationship because I would be pretty annoyed (disgusted). I'd distance myself, at least at work, and just worry about taking care of my patients. This is not really advice as to what you should do but just what I think I would do based on how I think I'd feel.

It's your decision whether to go to your manager or not. If you feel that your relative's behavior is tangibly putting patients at risk then I'd say you must report it. On the other hand, if it's just lazy work ethic let management do their thing. If your manager comes to you and expresses disappointment or asks you to answer for this in some way, just state something along the lines, "I'm sorry this has  not turned out well. I would never have guessed this would be her work ethic and would not have recommended her had I known."

 

[sleepwalker, MSN, NP]

JKL33 said:

If your manager comes to you and expresses disappointment or asks you to answer for this in some way, just state something along the lines, "I'm sorry this has  not turned out well. I would never have guessed this would be her work ethic and would not have recommended her had I known."

I agree. I'd even toss out a comment saying a decision to fire her or take corrective measures would not be taken personally just to quell any management concerns about repercussions to your productivity, morale, etc.

[DavidFR, BSN, MSN, RN]

Why not point out to her quite bluntly that stealing from the hospital is not only a fireable offence but leaves her open to prosecution? Speak to her again, perhaps a lot more forcefully about her performance. Tell her that it's commonplace in Canada for underperformers to be disciplined and even fired, and for theives to be prosecuted leaving their chances of re-employment virtually nil. Underline that you trusted her and you feel let down. See if that shakes her up. Don't worry how she takes it. Relatives sometimes use family ties as blackmail - don't buy it. I've learned over the years that blood doesn't have to be thicker than water. You're not obliged to be her friend if she betrays your trust in this way.  

It seems to me you're a fundamentally nice person, recommending her in the first place and now worrying how she takes things and saying you "didn't want to argue". Sometimes we can be too nice. Don't worry about how she takes it if you tackle her more forcefully. YOU have the moral highground here. You're right you don't have managerial authority over her, but on a personal level she's letting you down.

Try it just once more, very forcefully. Show that your're upset and angry. If after a more direct talk she just carries on distance yourself,  and if management notice I'm sure they'll realise it's her performance and not yours that's under par.  

Good luck and I hope it works out for you. If it doesn't work out for her - don't worry about it. She's responsible for her own actions.