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Discussion

The hardest thing

The hardest thing you have to do is to prepare yourself to say goodbye to a resident whom you have cared for for the past 3 years. It hit me today that she is not going to get better, and that her life is coming to an end. I'm having a hard time accepting it though, I know that she is in her 90's and she has lived a very long and productive life, but it still hurts my heart to see her struggle. I think about going into work and not seeing her and it kills me. I try not to get too attached to my residents, but its hard for me. I've gone through it before with other residents, and it seems the hardest when you are close with the family members too. I just pray that she is at peace, and not in pain. Sorry for the sad story/vent :(

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    God bless you for your loving heart.

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    . I just pray that she is at peace, and not in pain. Sorry for the sad story/vent :(
    The best thing you can do is make sure to aggressively treat her symptoms and educate your co-workers and make sure they follow through. Get her comfort meds order around the clock to make sure she is comfortable. Take time to offer support to the family. tToo often in LTC we don't have the time for the little extras like extra chairs and tissues at the bedside and drinks from the kitchen .Offer to contact someone from the choice of their choice,get a CD player from the activities dept and her fav c.d's. And celebrate the joy that has been her long life and thank the family for the honor of caring for her. You'll miss her but think of where she'll be. In a better place then we are right now.
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    It is a hard thing to say goodbye, to let go. I tell myself over and over not to get involved with residents and their families. But, there is always that special resident for whatever reason, you really get attached to. Know that you've made a difference in their life and you've been a comfort to them and their family.

    We have a remembrance service twice a year to honor residents who've died. It helps.

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    And I also keep reminding myself the resident isn't "mine". I've lost all of mine and I'm done. I'm not lifting that weight for anyone else. I do get teary because I feel so sorry for the surviving family because I do know what that loss it like. I do my best to make sure the end of life care is being delivered around the clock effectively and then I concentrate on educating and supporting the family. It gives me a great feeling of satisfaction to know I have made some little bit of difference to someone at that time-when you are loosing a loved one you do feel like you are all alone and I do my best to make sure they know they are not.

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