Supervisor and aide against me? I had to write statements

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Charge Nurse, brand new and 20's. I've been breaking up assignments with one aide rotating with a higher amount of patients and it goes through in that way. So one day Aide 1 gets more and the other gets one less patient, and another day Aide 2 does. We've had drama on our floor that the aides weren't happy with so a lot of this is to create fairness. Which I was really proud of.

I've been doing the culture of care requests which entail us doing group huddle ( nurses werent doing that for their aides prior to me accepting the job).

I've been struggling with a few aides. This one aide flipped out on me last night where I feel at a lost because the Sup (per diem) sided with the aide. The aide was saying the second aide hasn't returned from her break so I said, " Oh let me text them, I want you to have your full break."

The aide misconstrued that as me picking/favoring sides. She kept saying " This is why I don't work with her because you know how I feel about her. You guys know how I feel about her." I was quiet. She kept screaming that I was this and that and eventually the other aide started to fight her to defend me. I tried to break it up but the supervisor felt like I was at fault because I texted the aide to come back from break so the other aide ( accusing me) could take her full break for relief.

" YOU are the ***-stirrer for this. You ARE playing favorite with aides."

So basically. My name has been tarnished ( by this aide who says I am playing favorites). and basically. well. I asked my nursing educator to move me to the day shift because now I lack support.

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Specializes in ER.

You can't win with the NAC wars. You are dealing with powers and principalities beyond anyone's abilities.

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Do the accusations stem from you being on "texting terms" with the one who didn't return from break? Or is all of this just 100% nonsensical?

What was the "this and that?" (Kind of important).

Gotta ask: Are you friends with one of them more than the other?

(It isn't wrong, per se, but it will guarantee you these types of scenarios).

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@jkl33

I am friends with the aide who needed to come back on break. I said, " Oh you seem upset by this let me text her so you can take your full break." It was an innocent statement. The aide is known to be mentally not right but everytime I tried to speak my side of the story to my sup the aide would come up and scream saying I am a liar and how they swore on their dead relatives I was doing everything to conspire against them. The supervisor said NO I wanna hear your side here RIGHT NOW, HERE--when I tried to pull her aside to speak to her in a quiet manner. While the orther aide was losing it and kept interrupting me. Then the sup said YOU ARE THE ***-STIRRER.

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Geez...

I got nothin' for that.

I guess I would just say try to keep things as "clean" (strictly professional, prudent, and fair) as possible. Although aide #2 does sound unhinged (or just cognizantly manipulative in an aggressive way), try not to give these people a seed to start with.

Every - - and I do mean every - - word you say in their presence is ammo for them. So limit your words.

Case in point:

4 hours ago, 2018nurseandbeyond said:

Oh you seem upset by this let me text her so you can take your full break.

I completely do understand the spirit you were trying to show in the way you worded this. (Acknowledgment given, immediately addressing the issue, etc.) but I guarantee you the way your statement was received was: "What?! I am upset? Why make it about me?? *I'm* not the one who is getting away with abusing breaks. And, by the way, she probably knows she can get away with this because you're her friend. And look at you letting her get away with it!"

So. She says someone is not back from break? You take out your phone on the spot and contact them by whatever official means is used to contact coworkers (work phones). Tell them they need to return. If it is a chronic/regular issue, you deal with it the way you would for anyone, including mentioning it/counseling then writing it up if that is what is expected.

Limit your words.

In general, though, this all sounds very toxic. Both aide #2 and the supervisor's inappropriate handling.

Not good.

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@JKL04

thank you

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