Starting from scratch...

[caterpillar]

Hello everyone,

I've been reading the various posts on this forum for some time and have learned a great deal from other people's experiences. I think it's great the kind of support people provide and get here and how honest people can be with their opinions.

I'm posting because maybe someone would be willing to offer some advice regarding my situation. I recently have had the guts to face myself in the mirror and admit to myself that I am a complete and utter failure. I seriously messed up and wasted time and opportunities. I spent 4 years in college pursuing a liberal arts degree I enjoyed, and then went straight into nursing school for another 3 years. I did pretty well on all my exams and managed to pass all of my classes with a pretty decent gpa. Problem is I was always a quiet student. Got along with my peers well, however I wasn't that impressive clinically (partially because I have anxiety issues) and as a result of some circumstances I failed to handle in a more appropriate way, I have a feeling none except for 1 of my instructors are willing to put in a good reference for me. Several agreed when I originally asked if they could act as references for me, but when it came to the crucial time, there was no response from them.

I've been incredible lucky enough as a new grad to recently get 2 interviews. I think I did pretty well considering I was given verbal offers. However, I've already lost one of the offers and I think it's most likely because of my references. I've tried to get in contact with all the possible people I could think of, and only 2 have answered me and are willing to vouch for me. One of them is someone I know from volunteering at a hospital. Unfortunately however, he isn't an RN, and the current place will not accept him as a reference.

Needless to say, I've learned a lot from this experience and realized how ill prepared, immature, and naive I was going into college. I didn't think about getting references and preparing for the job process. Yes, you'd think I'd think about it the first time around, but I guess I needed to screw up one more time in a major way for me to really learn this.

So in a nutshell, I'm seriously doubting my ability to start my RN career. I'm still trying to make an effort to get in contact with some of my references in hope someone else will be willing to vouch for me, and I'm still going to keep applying to more RN jobs...but time is really ticking for me. I admit, I've been an incredibly lucky, sheltered person who took many things for granted. I know I didn't put my all during nursing school, knew I should have pushed myself more. I should have communicated more. I'm just reaping what I sowed now.

I'm curious, has anyone been in my position and what did they do? I'm looking into other options available and am going to be working a seasonal retail job for now. I'm past being in a depressive slump over this and wallowing in my self pity and am now trying to move on from the fact that I may never be able to practice as a nurse now. I'm so lost as to what I should do now, and not sure who will give me another chance to prove myself.

Thank you for reading this and any advice you can give...

[NICU Guy, BSN, RN]

If you need an instructor's reference, then go to an instructor that you feel is fair and a student advocate (1 that truly wants students to succeed). Sit down with them and explain your situation and pour your heart out about how you felt you screwed up and that you wish you could have done things differently. You need to be what I call "brutal honesty". Pretty much own up to all of your faults in nursing school. That will show maturity and maybe an instructor would be willing to go on a limb and give you a reference.

Hopefully, the instructors on this site can give you some insight as to what it would take to give a student a reference.

[applesxoranges, BSN, RN]

Keep on applying. I would also look out for other people to put down like former bosses. What about classmates you worked with clinically?