Something you might appreciate

[Coldfoot]

This may get moved from the OZ forum to humor but I thought I'd give you all first crack at it.

You're not Australian until you've:

1) You've caught a blowfly buzzing around your head with your bare hands.

2) You've mimicked Alf Stewart from 'Home and Away' - "Push off, ya flamin' drongo"

3) You have argued whether Fords are better than Holden's

4) You've done the Hot Sand run from the beach to your towel

5) You know who Ray Martin is

6) You call your home "My Joint"

7) You start using words like 'Bloody, grouse and champ'

8) You stop greeting people with 'Hello' and go straight into 'how're you doin'?

9) You've seriously considered running down to the shops in a pair of ugh boots

10) You own ugh boots

11) You've been to a one day cricket match and screamed incomprehensibly until your throat went raw

12) You've had to decide between putting up with mosquitoes and moving the BBQ inside

13) You've changed your ring tone on your mobile phone to something much more annoying than the one it came with

14) You kind of know the first verse of the national anthem, but buggered if you know what 'girt' means

15) You have a story that some how revolves around excess consumption of alcohol and a mate named 'Dave'

16) You're secretly annoyed with Russell Crowe

17) You own a Bonds t-shirt and wear it with pride

18) You've risked attending a music festival on the hottest day of the year

19) You've tried to hang off a Hills Hoist while pretending you could fly

20) You've had to visit the emergency room after hanging off Hills Hoist and pretending you could fly

21) You own pair of thongs for every day use, and another pair of dress thongs for special occasions

22) You don't know what's in a meat pie and you don't care

23) You pronounce Australia 'Straya'

24) You call soccer 'soccer', not football

25) You know a dog named Bluey

26) You've squeezed Vegemite between Vita Wheat to make Vegemite worms

27) You suck coffee though a Tim Tam

28) You've become deeply cynical of politicians

29) You realise that lifeguards are the only ones who can wear Speedo's and look good

30) You've been in a Ute with a blue heeler in the back

31) You pledge allegiance to Vegemite over Promite

32) In your CD collection you have at least one: Kylie Minogue, Cold Chisel or Paul Kelly

33) You understand the value of Public Holidays

34) You order a "Hamburger with the lot, thanks love"

35) You believe that the flavour of any meal is improved by adding tomato sauce

36) You have been invited to a B&S Ball

37) Your weekends are spent barracking for your favourite sports team

38) You have a toilet dolly

39) You've played beach cricket with a tennis ball and a bat fashioned out of a fence post

40) You still go on about how great the Sydney Olympics were

41) You firmly believe that in the end, everything will be ok, and have told a mate in tough times that 'She'll be right, mate'

42) You use the phrase 'no worries' at least once a day

43) You've been on a beach holiday and probably stayed in a caravan

44) You constantly shorten words. For example, breakfast becomes

'brekkie' and afternoon becomes 'arvo', barbeque becomes 'barbie'

45) You order a $5 steak the size of your head at your local RSL

46) You've adopted a local bar as one of your own

47) You know all the words to 'Holy Grail' and sing it at the top of your lungs.

48) Your idea of a holiday is driving hundreds of kilometres to sit on the banks of the Murray and drink copious amounts of alcohol while you pretend to be fishing

49) You can't understand why John Farnham never became an international success

50) You know that the oath of mateship can never be limited by geographical distance

:)

[gwenith, BSN, RN]

Thanks for postin' these Mate!!

1) You've caught a blowfly buzzing around your head with your bare hands.

You also have swallowed at least two flies in the course of a conversation and didn't even stop to cough!!

You know what an "Australian wave" is!!

2) You've mimicked Alf Stewart from 'Home and Away' - "Push off, ya flamin' drongo"

You have also mimicked Kylie Mole, Con the Fruiterer and you know where the phrase "He's gotta be Dreamin'" comes from.

4) You've done the Hot Sand run from the beach to your towel

Also known as the "Toasted Toe Tango"

9) You've seriously considered running down to the shops in a pair of ugh boots

:chuckle Actually they are Ugg Boots

but I do agree if you wear them too long the pong does turn them more into an Ugh boot!

11) You've been to a one day cricket match and screamed incomprehensibly until your throat went raw

Ah! Now we actually have to share that pastime with the Poms - mind you you gotta be an Aussie to know exactly what a Pommie is..............

12) You've had to decide between putting up with mosquitoes and moving the BBQ inside

And if you live in "The Territory" you have actually watched the Mossies cart the ruddy Barbie back outside again then sit around it beckoning you to come out!!!

14) You kind of know the first verse of the national anthem, but buggered if you know what 'girt' means

Isn't "Gert" that shiela that owns a beach house???

16) You're secretly annoyed with Russell Crowe

Actually - he is a Kiwi but they are not sure they want him either:chuckle

19) You've tried to hang off a Hills Hoist while pretending you could fly

20) You've had to visit the emergency room after hanging off Hills Hoist and pretending you could fly

You haven't lived as a kid unless you have tried this.

21) You own pair of thongs for every day use, and another pair of dress thongs for special occasions

Q How do you who is the bride at a wedding in Woop Woop??

A She is the one in thongs

Now here we are talking of the type that go on the feet

(Ps Real Aussies also know where Woop Woop is!!)

22) You don't know what's in a meat pie and you don't care

That's because they are always made from genuine animal products

25) You know a dog named Bluey

Or a mate named "Bluey" because of his red hair

27) You suck coffee though a Tim Tam

A connoisseur's delight - Ya don't know what ya missin'

28) You've become deeply cynical of politicians

Keep tellin' ya - all Polies are a bunch of raving ratbags that couldnt lie straight in bed!!!

38) You have a toilet dolly

Goes with the crocheted coathangers and the placky(plastic) bag bag.

43) You've been on a beach holiday and probably stayed in a caravan

Been there done that bought the T-shirt and the hat!! 'Bout to do it again soon!!

[joannep]

And I have to tell you, only an american would have married that crocodile fella from QLD, no self respecting aussie gal would have!!