Single SRNAs..

EmeraldNYL, BSN, RN · Feb 1, 2005

Hey, I feel your pain. Everyone talks about how tough it is to go through anesthesia school with a family and kids, but what about us single SRNAs? I think we have a whole different set of worries and concerns. The money thing is mostly my worry-- I live by myself and will totally be supporting myself by loans this fall when I start school full-time. I have no idea what I'm going to do about health insurance-- I hope the school has a policy I can buy. I have supportive friends who live close, but my family lives 2 hours away. While I don't have all the obligations of marriage and kids, going through anesthesia school alone is still a little scary. I'm sure I'll probably be one of the youngest people in my class (I'm only 24), but hopefully I'll meet some other people like myself in my program.

egul105 · Feb 1, 2005

I feel your pain too. My boyfriend and I were living together and planning on getting married. I got accepted at TCU and thought I had it all mapped out and that I only had to worry about tuition. He broke up with me 3 weeks ago and basically kicked me out of the house. Now I'm also living on my own, don't have any furniture, and very afraid I won't be able to go to school due to the money constraints. I'm trying to be positive about it - at least I won't have to worry about a relationship, but it's hard

InTheBlood · Feb 1, 2005

I feel your pain too. My boyfriend and I were living together and planning on getting married. I got accepted at TCU and thought I had it all mapped out and that I only had to worry about tuition. He broke up with me 3 weeks ago and basically kicked me out of the house. Now I'm also living on my own, don't have any furniture, and very afraid I won't be able to go to school due to the money constraints. I'm trying to be positive about it - at least I won't have to worry about a relationship, but it's hard

Sounds like you're in a tough spot, but you can do it. Here's some advice, take it for what it's worth. Try to downsize as much as you can and be prepared to be extremely tight during school. You can take out huge amounts of $$$ for school, I took out about $60,000 for the first 2 semesters! My theory is you do what you have to because this is truly a life-changing opportunity. If you have to go into debt $150,000 or more, so what. You just do it, and after you're making the big bucks you can pay off your debt. Also, make it a point to visit your ex in your new Lexus/Mercedez/Hummer/Escalade/Corvette/etc. after you're out of school and on top of things and let him know what he's missing. :chuckle

Another tip for you that I think is a great deal: check into the graduate housing on campus. These spots fill up pretty fast, but they're a great, great deal. The cost is very good (can't remember the exact #s) and I think all utilities (including cable) are included. Plus, you're literally 1 block away from your new home--the Bass bldg. These apartments are only a couple of years old and very nice. Also, they're wired for wireless internet, which means if you have a laptop, then you can get connected anywhere in the apartment without being physically connected to a phone jack. It's very cool; FYI the Bass bldg. is also capable of wireless internet.

I wish you all the luck; you'll be fine. Actually getting accepted is half the battle, hang in there. PM me if you have any questions.

jewelcutt · Feb 1, 2005

I know exactly how everyone feels. I started out as 1 out of 2 single people in my class but that number is now 5 since school does really test the relationship. I too am tired of everyone claiming us singles have it easy. I have to pay everything on my own and have way more debt than the committed. Plus it's really lonely coming home everyday with no support to listen to me rant about clinicals or class, or make me a nice dinner every now and then, or even take me out once a week. People that have families can spend some time with them to get their mind off of school. I can't even vacation because nobody wants to do that on their own. All the couples and married people spend all their time together so a lot of people don't want to go to the bar on fridays after school, so I often go with the single upperclassmen. Most of my friends have boyfriends, and the ones that are single only want to go "clubbing" all the time (no thanks). At the annual national convention everyone brings their stupid significant other so I can't wait to hang out with a bunch of couples (single people hate hanging out with all couples, you feel very left out). All of us on this board still single at the end of school should go on a vacation together (no couples allowed :chuckle, just kidding). What really sucks is that all your life is is anesthesia school, no to mention the fact we're all getting up there in age and there just aren't as many prospects the older you get.

rn29306 · Feb 1, 2005

I know exactly how everyone feels. I started out as 1 out of 2 single people in my class but that number is now 5 since school does really test the relationship. I too am tired of everyone claiming us singles have it easy. I have to pay everything on my own and have way more debt than the committed. Plus it's really lonely coming home everyday with no support to listen to me rant about clinicals or class, or make me a nice dinner every now and then, or even take me out once a week. People that have families can spend some time with them to get their mind off of school. I can't even vacation because nobody wants to do that on their own. All the couples and married people spend all their time together so a lot of people don't want to go to the bar on fridays after school, so I often go with the single upperclassmen. Most of my friends have boyfriends, and the ones that are single only want to go "clubbing" all the time (no thanks). At the annual national convention everyone brings their stupid significant other so I can't wait to hang out with a bunch of couples (single people hate hanging out with all couples, you feel very left out). All of us on this board still single at the end of school should go on a vacation together (no couples allowed :chuckle, just kidding). What really sucks is that all your life is is anesthesia school, no to mention the fact we're all getting up there in age and there just aren't as many prospects the older you get.

Ditto.....

Kiwi, BSN, RN · Feb 2, 2005

This is a cool topic...

kjt2004 · Feb 2, 2005

Just keep your head up and think positive. Thank goodness it didn't happen after you started school. The stress of a beakup during schools might hurt your ability to focus.

Just borrow, borrow and borrow. Try to earn as much money as you can before school start. "Where there is a will, there is a way."

When you are finished, wave your degree and CRNA license in his face.

Good luck.

You have an opportunity of a life time. I wish I were in your shoes. I would leave my man any day to pursue my goals. I love him but do not know what the future hold for us. However, I know if i go to school there will be a degree at the end.

You are probably better off without him!

I feel your pain too. My boyfriend and I were living together and planning on getting married. I got accepted at TCU and thought I had it all mapped out and that I only had to worry about tuition. He broke up with me 3 weeks ago and basically kicked me out of the house. Now I'm also living on my own, don't have any furniture, and very afraid I won't be able to go to school due to the money constraints. I'm trying to be positive about it - at least I won't have to worry about a relationship, but it's hard

EmeraldNYL, BSN, RN · Feb 2, 2005

I love this thread!!!!! Jewelcutt, you are right on about the vacation thing..... I need a vacation sooooo bad but who takes a vacation by themselves?? What, am I gonna tag along with my friend and her husband?? I'm only 24 (recently out of a LTR) and I already am feeling like I'm gonna be alone, with all this money after I finish anesthesia school, and 20 cats (and I don't even like cats). I just pray that all this sacrifice will be worth it someday.....

jewelcutt · Feb 2, 2005

Oh my god!! I got a kitten because I was so lonely and he's like my whole life. Alll I think about is the old woman who lives with her cats, god I hope that won't be me. You know the type, always reading some sort of old book, wearing old flowery dresses, life depending on gardening and her cats, all the neighbor kids thinking she's a witch, grocery shopping only at the local town market, ahhhhhhh! Aren't those the types that always get killed in movies? I can see myself now getting artificially inseminated at 45 and birthing in some sort of blowup pool in my livingroom :chuckle . I think I'll kill myself before I get to that point. I wish there were more vacations for single people, like spa vacations where you don't have to pay for double occupancy. Believe me, it's better you broke up now rather than in school, you don't want that kind of stress. I think the hardest part is finding smart guys, everyone I meet seems kind of dumb, one asked me if I could get a hold of the "good" drugs.

An Yogi · Feb 2, 2005

Do it.

Basically I got tired of trying to coordinate with others for trips. So I started to go solo. You get to do what you want and when. No coordinating with 3 other people. Traveling with women is like herding cats...hard to get them all out the door in the (late) morning, then someone wants to go shopping, someone else the museum, someone else the beach. Traveling third wheel with another couple....been there done that, saw them at the airport leaving the states and at the airport returning to the states.

If you've never traveled solo, pick a 4 day weekend, relatively close by, within driving distance. Stay at a cool bed and breakfast on the shore or some neat little historic town outside whatever metropolis you are currently living in. If you live in a neat little historic town, go visit a 'big city'.

Dining solo: Bring a book or magazine. Something that you're interested in. Yoga Journal opens up conversations. Quantum physics is also great for conversations, however, I have difficulty carrying on an indepth conversation

Plan ahead but be flexible for changes. For example, a 4 day driving trip and plan to stay in 2 different cities. But you're having such a wonderful time in the first town, you decide to stay an extra night. Make sure you have cancellable reservations for the other hotel/motel/B&B. Some B&B will charge a night's stay if cancelled less than 2-3 days before the reservation date.

Research the town/area you plan to travel. Make a list of I have to do this, I'd like to do this, and if there's time I want to do this. These are suggestions. When you get there, you may be lured by the waves and stay there 3 days and never see the museum. But that's what YOU decided to do! I do have to admit, the evenings were the most difficult/awkward to find entertainment. I've gone to plays, symphony concerts, an occasional movie, etc.

Then, of course, safety issues. Leave an itinerary with friends at home with numbers. Only to 'bother' you if necessary. You are on vacation! Keep credit cards/debit cards/Dillards/Chevron/etc down to a minimum. Leave all unnecessary cards at home. Write down numbers of cards you do take, secure away in safe place within your luggage along with the number to the bank in case they're stolen. I leave those numbers with friends in case I get completely ripped off. Never has happened, but I'm a firm believer in preparing for the worst.

Once you've seen how much fun you can have...do longer/more adventurous trips.

Happy trails!

An Yogi

sway · Feb 2, 2005

I experienced a very similar situation a few years back during my RN program. I was basically the only single person, out of 20 in my class. One really annoying thing I noticed was that people with families (especially kids) were constantly being granted exceptions to assignments, due dates, etc. They were always cut a bunch of slack because of their kids...getting to leave early, arrive late, absences excused, etc. I always thought this was totally unfair to me, since I see children as a life choice, and I choose not to have them but to do other things. Why should my preferences be treated as less important than theirs?

Do any of you single SRNAs notice this type of discrimination?