Self-Doubt....it sucks

[desert_MP, BSN, RN]

I took my Patho/Pharmacology 2 ATI today. The school Im attending requires us to get at least a proficiency level 2 on the ATI exam to pass the course. I fell short. I believe I missed the mark by 2 or three questions. My instructor was far from supportive. She made some valid points. "You should be concerned about missing these questions..." and then she went into explaining how we just covered them the week prior. I know we covered the material. Throughout the course Im sure we covered all of the material. I dont want to make up excuses but Im married and I have two young children at home. I dont have a HUGE amount of time to study.

I guess the main concern I have is...if I cant pass this ATI test then how can I be sure I'll be a good nurse? I dont want to be a 77% nurse when it comes to drugs. I have a 77% right now, which is the minimum required to pass. However, I have to still pass the ATI. I get one more shot.

My motivation is just extremely lacking. Any working BSN's out there who didnt pull great grades but are not struggling in the workforce? The way they make it sound in school is if I dont get all A's and B's then I'll fail in my career.

Iraq wasnt this hard.

[nursemike, ASN, RN]

Not exactly the reply you asked for: I'm an ASN who made excellent grades (well, only a B in pharm, but it was a strong B) and struggled like heck when I got out of school.

Self-doubt? Get used to it. It's inevitable, and at times it's even an ally. A new nurse who isn't anxious probably isn't paying attention. Of course, it can also cripple you. You'll figure out how to balance being careful vs being paralyzed. We all do.

School and work have several things in common. For example, they're both hard. Also, you sometimes won't get the kind of support you need, and deserve. You will feel stupid and want to give up, because you aren't stupid. If you don't feel stupid, sometimes, you need to wear a sign, although your co-workers will quickly figure out if you're stupid enough not to feel stupid.

But there are also some big differences. In work, you need to know about 25 meds by heart. The rest you'll look up. You'll find out which ones when you choose a unit. Med-surg, you might need to know 50. I've given thorazine twice. For intractable hiccups. There are vast, vast numbers of meds I have never given, and never will. Still had to past tests on them in school, because some of them are meds other nurses give daily. I carry a drug guide in my PDA. I work neuro. Ativan and dexamethasone are old friends. I still have to double check whether amlodipine is amiodarone. My friends in cardiology are so dumb, they don't even know how to put Nimodipene down an NG. (The liquid center makes the pill crusher smell nice and pepperminty!)

My nurse manager--one of those goody-goodies who you just know was on the dean's list her whole life--once remarked that in 25 years of nursing, no one ever asked her what her GPA was. They ask if you have a valid license. Do what you need to to get one. After that, you can learn to be a nurse.

[classicdame, MSN, EdD]

I don't see how one test can predict your whole future.

Study and get better at it. Get a tutor if needed. Get in a study group. Get a professional educator to assess your deficiencies in learning (not enough time, focus on wrong concepts, read into the question----)