I thought about putting this on Allnurses Central and maybe a mod will end up moving it - but I am really bothered, and it has a lot to do with my disability (bipolar). Has to do with my functioning as a nurse. Also has to do with our patients, what if we have to take care of someone who has shot and killed other people? (I'm sure many of you have had to deal w/ it).
Funny, just last nite saw Grey's Anatomy in which they had to operate on a shooter in a mass casualty situation.
ANYway - here is my rant, do with it as you will, I just cut-and-pasted it from my almost-post on Central:
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Here is a rant, skip it if you are sick of hearing about other people's problems (lol)
REALLY upset about this shooting, but not for the reasons you might think. A friend mentioned we need to pray for the shooter's family as well as for those in the crossfire. Didn't occur to me, and she was right.
Later, I realized we ought to pray for the shooter himself.
GAH -= I hate that people are going to pick apart his "being disturbed" as they call it. It's obvious apparently, from his FB and myspace accounts, that it has been festering for a long time...
So, of COURSE mental illness a major cause. I can't imagine a scenario where anyone who shoots a human being (other than self-defense) could possibly be sane.
But I can't help but think about a few members of my family, and I myself, who suffer from mental illness, and but for the grace of God it could have been one of us with that gun - (shaking my head). And now sitting in a jail cell wondering what on earth happened ... or even - feeling justified? He might be...
I imagine his family is wondering "what if" and "what could they have done to help him before he got to this point..."
I don't know why I "went there" but I don't like it. Just feeling really sad and disgusted.
It really makes me mad the cost of mental illness on the fabric of our society, emotionally, financially, etc.
And, selfishly I know, hating that I have to deal with my own. Like, dealing with meds and dr's appts, plus all the worry about 2 siblings and my own son - who don't really take care of their illness. And, if you recall, I went a couple years thinking it was wise not to be on meds myself. Found out I was risking myself and my patients' safety, because I did relapse with my hypomania. That ALSO makes me mad, in hindsight. I could have hurt someone, or myself, on the job, driving, who knows?
Which goes to show you, the person with mental illness doesn't always judge their problem correctly!!! Feeling a little guilt there. At times have felt VERY guilty.
Of course, the meds aren't always right, so it isn't always the patient. And, sometimes side effects can make a person screwy.
So, forgive me for ranting a little bit - I am just really sad for the whole situation. Of course I am upset for the people who were shot and their loved ones.
There is also the obvious thought, that life is short and we never know when someone we love can be taken away from us - reminds us to make peace with each other and with God.
Sighhhh-
