"Sorry, I can't... I have to study!"

[Brookes1129]

Is anyone else having a hard time with that sentence? "Sorry, I can't... I have to study?" I swear this has been the only thing I say to people outside of school!

I know we have to take down time, but sometimes I feel like my friends and family secretly resent all the time and effort I am putting into nursing school, and at times, I actually feel guilty for having to tell people no.

The worst is my friend just died suddenly and the funeral is a plane ride away, my entire social circuit and family are going... but I had to say no. Who can afford to take 3-4 days out of school?

Basically, with this post, I am just looking to see if anyone else ever feels guilty about the time and effort it takes to make it in nursing school and how do you balance school and life??:typing

[sharkdiver]

This is true in almost any technical/scientific degree program, not just nursing. I'm sorry to hear about the passing of your friend, and hopefully your family and friends understand your inability to attend the funeral.

Something that they, and you, need to remember is that funerals are not for those who have died, but for the family and friends that they leave behind. It's a way to say "goodbye", and as the pshrinks would say "provide closure and begin the healing process". It's a way for us who remain to face our loss, and by sharing our grief, lessen it, but it's not the only way.

My concern for you is that you find a way to deal with the loss of your friend that works for you......and if anyone gives you a hassle over not attending the funeral, look them straight in the eye and say "I know in my heart that XXXX(deceased friend) would understand - why can't you?"

[redtshirt]

Sorry i came off as insensitive in my last reply. Ive missed family members anniversaries and important dates too. Your friend is probably proud of you and would want to see you suceed. Not everyone is a believer in religion so just because you were physically unable to be at the funeral does not mean you weren't thinking of your friend or mourning them in your own way. Everyone has there own way of dealing with dying after all so don't feel guilty your friend wouldnt want you to.

[kat von b]

I'm in week 3 of my first year in nursing school and I used the excuse today actually. I work per-diem and last week offered to work today after class but I had to call this morning and say I couldn't make it, we have our first test this thursday and I;m pretty much freakin out and felt like I needed the extra time to study rather then get in a few hours of work.

I'm sorry for the loss of your friend, I'm sure he/she understands that even though you can't be there in person you're there in heart!

[trepinCT]

I was feeling guilty just today(one of many days I feel that way). My friend really wants to go to a dem with her on Friday("just a couple of hours" they say), but I have an exam on Monday. With 4 kids and a hubby who works rotating shifts, I cannot afford "just a couple of hours". I feel bad, but I am done in May and I worked so hard to get this far.My sister in law is always after me to get my date book out to have kids hang out, but I just smile and say "sure, I am free after May 2009" For Christmas I boight some family members a 2 year calender 2008/2009 and marked May 21st as my graduation date- told them to call me the 22nd......