"No, I am not pregnant"

Nurses Humor

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So today I am outside of my office, and along comes a guy walking past me and stops to ask "Are you pregnant?"

:angryfire

(I am NOT pregnant, nor am I even fat..maybe a little bloated!) OK Im 5'11" and maybe 140lbs... So I just stare at him in shock and say NO, then I walk straight inside without looking back at him.

I am SO mad!!!!!!!!!!!! and a little sad! :bluecry1:

Specializes in PCU - Stepdown.

This happened to me when I worked in a business office. I got my period, so was bloated, and simultaneously got the stomach flu, which just happened to kick in an hour or so after I got to work. I went in and told my boss I wasn't feeling well and needed to go home. He said "you have a little tummy there, are you pregnant?" Well..... I gave him a look and said, "short of emaculate conception, no!" He just laughed... I chalked it up to his being British, but I guess a lot of men think this is a good idea! :icon_roll

It was kinda funny later.... :lol2:

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Specializes in LTC, office.

I was watching a comedian recently who joked the only time you should ask if I woman is pregnant is if you can see the baby coming out. Probably not bad advice. :D

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Don't be sad! I wish I were 5' 11"!!! Next time you see him, perhaps you will have a little "morning sickness" in his direction. Too gross?

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What a DORK! I'm 5'3" and currently weigh 148. Did you know this guy? You should have said, "yes I'm pregnant, and it's YOUR baby!" Don't waste a minute feeling anything about this guy except relief that you're NOT having his baby:)!

And say it in a really loud voice, in public, preferably around his SO.:yeah:That ought to start some really good fireworks.

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Don't be sad! I wish I were 5' 11"!!! Next time you see him, perhaps you will have a little "morning sickness" in his direction. Too gross?

If it's on the foot, not gross enough. If you have really good aim, go for the face and duck when he starts blowing chunks.

:D:smokin:

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I've looked about 30 wks along since I had my first 5 years ago; when I get this question I answer with a cheerful "nope, just fat". The embarrassed looks that gets are TOTALLY worth it!

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Specializes in Cardiac.

I wear draw string scrubs, so it always looks like I got a little something going on under my scrubs because of the bow. So I've been asked if I'm pregnant a few times.

Sigh...

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I am fairly thin on my top half, but I have a bit of a belly, and I have been asked "Are you pregnant?" a few times.

I have two answers. "No, just fat."

My other answer is "No, are you?"

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Specializes in ER!.
Every time I read this post, I laugh my face off. If a female asks if you're pregnant when you're not, a good answer could be "Yes, and it's YOUR man's baby!" :idntdt:

God, I LOVE this! A sigh, slight dip of the head, then a gentle, "We were waiting for the right time to tell you... Oh, he hasn't told you???"

It's late. Folks in my family tend to get a little wired at night. But still, richly deserved.

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The response that I always use when asked if I am pregnant "No but I just gained 10 pounds thanks for noticing". Kinda mean but it definitley turns the tables. Can I just say though that being asked if you are pregnant is far less insultanting than having a person start rubbing your belly and then ask. ***** I dont go around petting other peoples fat rolls kindley keep your hands off mine! kthnx

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wow I really cant spell

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Specializes in Emergency/ Critical Care.
I've looked about 30 wks along since I had my first 5 years ago; when I get this question I answer with a cheerful "nope, just fat". The embarrassed looks that gets are TOTALLY worth it!

HEY! you stole my line! lol

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