Quiet Nurse = Bad Nurse?

[brionnag]

I have just finished my first semester of nursing school. I am so happy and excited, and proud of myself, but at the same time slightly discouraged. "Quiet, shy, you need to be more confident," were the main criticisms in my final clinical evaluation. Quiet!? Okay yes, by many people's standards I am a quiet person. I tend to keep things to myself, and to think about (or overthink) them for a long time. I am not always open with my thoughts or feelings. Talking is not my way of relieving stress or processing something. I know this is a turn off for a lot of people. However, quiet is part of who I am, and I don't think being quiet is the same thing as being shy. No I am not loud or boisterous or outwardly expressive, but I am not afraid either. Of course there is some mild anxiety that comes with being thrown into a brand new atmosphere. An atmosphere where I am performing potentially painful procedures that I just learned a few weeks ago on suffering strangers. It's crazy! But even though I do not show it with loud enthusiasm, I love it! I can't wait to learn more, and being written off as "quiet" and "unconfident" is really defeating. Taking a core part of my personality and telling me it is a weakness hurts. Maybe it is a weakness. I don't know. I want to be the best that I can be, but trying to force myself into being "loud" doesn't feel like the right thing to do. Any thoughts, or similar experiences?

[icuRNmaggie, BSN, RN]

I would much rather have a quiet and attentive nursing student who blends in, than the outspoken one with unwarranted high self esteem.

Confidence in the clinical setting, without training and experience, translates as arrogance.

All that I would expect is that you can be articulate about your patient's diagnosis, assessment and plan of care.

[Lev, MSN, RN, NP]

No, you can be a good nurse and be "quiet." Not everyone appreciates a loud chatty nurse.

[HTCC]

I'm not yet a nursing student, but I do work in healthcare and had clinicals where I heard the exact same thing! I was told I was too quiet, didn't ask enough questions, or seemed uninterested/unhappy. Ironically I was one of the top performers in my classes, and I've had a very successful career with lots of positive feedback! I'm smart but introverted so I'm not going to be the boisterous center of attention asking lots of questions. If I don't understand, I'll ask. But I'm not going to ask questions I don't need to in order to make a preceptor feel better. But now I'm burned out in this career and looking to change to nursing. I expect to hear the same things again, but I have enough experience to know it is not really a reflection on me as a professional. So don't be too hard on yourself. Just take it with a grain of salt and if you can honesty evaluate yourself and say that you are good at what you do, then be who you are! On the other hand, if you feel like these comments are true and that they hinder your professional abilities, then learn from that too.

[RN403, BSN, RN]

I was the "quiet" nursing student as well and had similar remarks from instructors, however, I have not had any issues as a nurse. I listen more than I speak...just my personality. I may not be loud but I am assertive. That's what is important. Remember to speak up for the best interest of your patients and yourself.

[PaulBaxter]

As with all feedback, you want to try to ignore the fact that it can sound painful or insulting and focus on what it tells you that could make you better at your profession. In this case, you want to think about the place of communication in nursing and how you can improve in that area.

Obviously I don't know you and haven't seen how you communicate, but these COULD be some things to think about:

Are you asking enough questions of you patients to learn what you need to about their condition and history?

Are you speaking enough or in the right ways to your patients to help put them at ease and develop rapport?

Are you asking enough questions of the floor nurses to enhance your learning experience?

Are you confident enough with yourself to do all of the above?

etc.

As I said, none of that is based on YOU, since I don't know you, but those could be some communication issues for those of us who tend to be quiet.