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Ash2016

Ash2016

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  1. Ash2016

    Having issues with being a "babyfaced" nurse.

    UPDATE: Sorry for the super late update, a lot has happened. Thank you for all the comments, I read every word, both the positive/supportive comments, and the tough love. Thank you for the support, advice, and good vibes. So to update all the people who took time to comment, that situation, it was very fresh when I posted that topic so I was still emotional. To be clear I didn't refuse care, she refused me due to my physical reaction, so telling her to come back another day was the best solution for her I could think of in that moment. Maybe I didn't include that part because I felt ashamed I was refused. It was the first time I had such a physical reaction to someone's poor behaviour that I didn't know what else to do, I was alone, I wasn't being facetious telling her that. She returned and the B/W was completed (not by me). She wasn't the first person to make these sort of comments but her comments somehow triggered me in a way others didn't, maybe it was her energy, maybe it was the stress I was under. So not to long after that incident I started full-fledged having panic attacks at work, I had 4 in total, I think the situation with her was a precursor to them. The panic attacks weren't triggered by rude patients but extreme stress. The last panic attack led me to have to be sent home. I took medical leave for 2 weeks, but ended up telling them I cannot return, due to being too embarrassed. I never had panic attacks before and when I had the last one it was obvious that it's not something that will just go away on its own. I'm seeing a counsellor (a physician with a background in counselling offered to do it for free) and I am taking Lexapro and prn Lorazepam. I'm very confused career wise, and unemployed. I want to stay in Nursing, maybe I had to go through this experience to understand things better. The confusing thing about Nursing is that like being able to do difficult tasks successfully is a huge confidence boost but others will bring your confidence right down (such as instructors, pts, other nurses). I mean I could fight it for sure, and I did before all this, but sometimes when you're tired it really gets to you, especially when you feel you get it worse than others and then try to find reasons like being baby faced… because the work ethic is there, so I don't really know... I think my mind frame that led to the attacks was that I was tired and burning out. The clinic would see about 200 pts a day not including telephone inquiries/demands/callbacks, and a lot of them were very entitled, demanding, and rude. I dealt with it for a yr (I graduated summer, 2016). I couldn't understand some of their behaviours especially that lady because I felt I was working SO HARD. I WAS TRYING SO HARD, and I actually cared so much about what I was doing. So it hurt my feelings, but I totally could have handled it better. I'm learning CBT. Also, to people saying it was wrong for me to cry in the bathroom after it happened is really weird. I don't actually cry or express myself enough which may be a cause of all this. It's not like I cried in front of everybody. I'd rather accept my emotions and let them come in and try to understand them than be one of those people who make passive aggressive remarks to strangers online in the guise of being helpful, or worse take work issues out on family like my parents used to do. Anyway I have mental health issues, I'm questioning Nursing as a profession, which I'm sad and lost about. If I can't do Nursing I want to stay in the medical field in some capacity.
  2. Ash2016

    Having issues with being a "babyfaced" nurse.

    @wuzzie I respect your point of view and it makes a lot of sense to me actually, I've thought about things I could do appearance wise, I do not wear make up and my scrubs are baggy... I do actually have womanly curves underneath... I agree walking away from what I worked hard for is immature. I think I needed to cool down and had a hard time with my emotions. I don't know how to be firm with patients about my appearance not being up for discussion. I tried it with her and it just escalated. I really do need therapy tbh. A month ago I emailed a bunch of low cost therapists in my area through this program and no one emailed me back. Money is an issue. I'll keep trying.
  3. Ash2016

    Having issues with being a "babyfaced" nurse.

    I mean to clarify she was oddly confrontational about my age and appearance, her reaction to me, it caught me off guard, and made me really nervous, I started shaking so I nicely told her that her comments made me nervous (probably should have used the word uncomfortable) and to come back another day (because I was by myself), she also has the option of using a public lab, I don't work in inpatient or outpatient urgent care to clarify. she gave me an attitude saying stuff like "and you going to be working with people?" not realizing I've been doing this for a year, went through nursing school which involves working with people, and worked in customer service for 7 yrs before that. I was literally having a physical reaction to this lady and could not proceed with blood work. It may be an accumulation of job stress. I did not go into a "fury" until after she left and went to the bathroom to silently cry... I don't usually cry in the bathroom, It's like the second time in my life. I have difficulty expressing anger so I usually shake or cry but tbh that rarely gets to that point and only once before also at work (but different job) I don't know why I couldn't brush her off as I've done with others or how she succeeded in transferring her negative energy on to me but obviously she triggered something me. I guess other people are more sheepish or sly in their comments and it doesn't bother me as much. Some background on my clinic, It's not a well oiled machine, patients act like they run the place, patients don't listen to me or other staff and constantly want and thrive off power struggles, it's draining. I mean I see the spectrum a lot of people or really sweet but the mean one's are driving me away, there are too many of them. Clinic staff is mostly new grads as owner can't afford experienced staff, extremely busy, and high turnover. The Doctor saw what happened and actually sided with me after the fact, which is rare.
  4. Ash2016

    Having issues with being a "babyfaced" nurse.

    I didnt go into detail but the gyst is she was very rude basically calling me incompetent because of my appearance and age. Ive done the brush of before saying how oh ill like when im older, but she had a very toxic and anxious energy the way she was talking to me, you would have to be there to understand my reaction. I take it personally because she was talking about my personal appearance. Im tired of people who lack boundaries. I know in my 40s wrinkles and all I would not behave this way. I work hard Ive done bloodwork hundred of times without issues.
  5. Hi there, Im having professional issues with looking young, i have the big eyes, high eyebrows, chubby cheeks, and weak chin. Ive been a nurse for only a yr working at a family doctor/walk in clinic environment, Im in densely populated area in a big city. I cant take it anymore. Im not being treated well, I know some of you will point the finger at me as if its something im doing but i promise i work hard and meticiously and i put patients first. Im not getting any respect as time goes on and patients are constantly testing me and making comments about my age and appearance, i have learned to brush it off and carry myself with confidence (even subconsiously speak with a deeper voice). I thought i would get a better and it is in some ways, theres always been patients ive connected with instantly and even the ones just looking to get in and out its a pleasent enough experience however the bad apples are ruining my personality and there are more bad apples than people think, i dont know if i can do this anymore, today i had a patient sit down on the chair before doing blood work and start bullying me about my age before i even had a chance to interact with her or say much to her, i got mad, im human, i couldnt proceed with the blood work causes i was shaking (d/t not being able to express my anger and taking a lot of ****, i just had a strong emotional reaction finally) asked her to come back another day, she scuffed and said "and your gonna work with people?" i looked at her and she seemed to take such pleasure in what she was doing. I cried in the bathroom after, thats a first for me. A person can only take so much. I feel like society is gettin worse and worse with its rudeness. Im already fed up, i tried to express myself to a coworker but she just laughed. I think the reason i got so upset is cause a spent a yr working really hard, im stressed, we are understaffed and this woman had the audacity to try to cut me down. She was vile. Im in my late 20s, there are a couple of girls who i think look younger than me and actually are but i never see them get this as much, i dont know what it is about me, im pretty blank and stoic, ive learned to be... So i dont know Does anyone have advice for me? Or have been through this? Or have someone they know who have been through this and found a solution? Im considering leaving nursing, as hard as ive worked so far, my mental health and selfesteem is suffering. Where does someone with a babyface face even fit in the professional world? I know that sounds weird but im serious, i know to be tough but id rather just be my normal self and do my job without being harrassed. People f with me more than they do others, i noticed this in nursing school as well. Sorry for the spelling mistakes, typed on my phone
  6. Ash2016

    RPN, Need help with Resume!

    HIGHLIGHTS OF QUALIFICATIONS Registered and in good standing with the College of Nurses of Ontario Membership with the Registered Practical Nurses Association of Ontario Clinical experience in Toronto area hospitals and in long term care working with geriatric, adult, and pediatric clients Successful completion of full-time consolidation at Sunnybrook Hospital in the postpartum unit, one of the select students chosen for this specialty placement through a competitive application process Computer proficient in MS Word, Adobe, Excel, Power Point, Internet, and Email Excellent interpersonal communication skills, and fluent in English EDUCATION & TRAINING Diploma: Practical Nursing, Graduated with Honours 2014-2016 Seneca College, King City, Ontario Course: IV Therapy and Phlebotomy September, 2016-Present Humber College, Toronto, Ontario BCLS, Standard First Aid and CPR with AED for HCP Certificate 2015 Canadian Red Cross, Toronto, Ontario Mask Fit Training 2014 Seneca College, King City, Ontario CLINICAL EXPERIENCE Maternal/Newborn Unit Sunnybrook Hospital, Toronto, ON January, 2016 - April, 2016 Participated in an intensive 426 hour consolidation experience Successfully cared for 4 pairs in the maternal/newborn unit, worked autonomously and as a member of the interdisciplinary team Short Stay Surgical Unit North York General Hospital, Toronto, ON September, 2015 - December, 2015 Successfully cared for patients at the short stay surgical unit, provided post-operative care, and health teaching to patients to be prepared for discharge Medicine/Rehabilitation Unit North York General Hospital, Toronto, ON May, 2015-August, 2015 Provided excellent care for patients at the long term medicine/rehabilitation unit, worked with predominantly geriatric patients, met and exceeded their specific patient needs Complex Continuing Care Unit Toronto Rehab - E.W. Bickle Centre, Toronto, ON January, 2015 - April, 2015 ADDITIONAL WORK EXPERIENCE Receptionist/Administrative Staff/Key Holder Company Name., Toronto, ON 2012 - 2014 Booked, confirmed, and arranged appointments for Realtors over the phone with polite telephone manners Wrote up offers, waivers, amendments, and other legal documents; met administrative needs of a staff of 60+ Realtors and provided excellent support for a positive work environment Sales Associate/Key Holder Company Name, Toronto, ON 2010 - 2012 Consistently maintained a professional and positive attitude that was foundational for outstanding customer interaction Exceeded sales goals on a daily bases with genuine enthusiasm, maintaining high sales for the business with personal annual sales of 100K+ Is this better?
  7. Ash2016

    RPN, Need help with Resume!

    It's really hard for me to gage what's important for them to know or not know, I'm just trying to impress but If they think that's boring then... should I just leave it to 2 bullet points per clinical experience and then add 1 bullet point for my previous actual work experience? My older jobs were simple customer service/admin type work, I figured the job titles are self explanatory. I can add education after highlights but should my nursing clinical experience go before my old work experience? It'll be more in chronological order then.
  8. Ash2016

    RPN, Need help with Resume!

    CanadianRN16 - Thank you for the words of encouragement! I'll apply to be a member of the RPNAO and add that in, I don't now why I didn't think of that!
  9. Ash2016

    RPN, Need help with Resume!

    Hi everyone, I graduated this past summer, and got licensed with the CNO mid august. I'm having a hard time finding my first job as an RPN. I haven't even gotten a call for an interview. Can someone please help me objectively, look at my resume and make edits. I've had others look at it but they aren't nurses so they just say it's fine. I've looked on "how to" sites as well. Still no calls. Are there any keywords I should add to make my resume more scannable? Thank you for your time! I've edited some things for privacy. It didn't past with the correct format with the dates, should be on one line but spaced to the right side of page. Spacing including with the bars are more even in actual doc. First & Last Name, RPN Contact Info HIGHLIGHTS OF QUALIFICATIONS Registered and in good standing with the College of Nurses of Ontario Clinical experience in Toronto area hospitals and in long term care working with geriatric, adult, and pediatric clients Successful completion of full-time consolidation at Sunnybrook Hospital in the postpartum unit, one of the select students chosen for this specialty placement through a competitive application process Computer proficient in MS Word, Adobe, Excel, Power Point, Internet, and Email Excellent interpersonal communication skills, and fluent in English CLINICAL EXPERIENCE Student Nurse, Sunnybrook Hospital, Toronto, ON Jan., 2016-Apr., 2016 Successfully cared for a limit of four pairs in the maternal/newborn unit, able to work autonomously and as a member of the interdisciplinary team Able to assess and assist mother with pain, signs of hemorrhage, fundal check, IV maintenance and removal, urinary output after birth, catheter removal, assessment of incision, side effects of analgesics, and if RhoGAM and/or MMR vaccine is needed Experienced in assessment of neonatal vital signs, daily weights, neonatal bath and physical assessment, neonatal abstinence scoring, jaundice in the infant, initiation of phototherapy; assisted the assessment of neonatal blood sugar for SGA, LGA infants and infants with mothers who have GDM Initiated health teaching for parents, assisted mother in breastfeeding, and provided alternatives such as lactation aid, spoon feeding, and finger feeding as needed Experienced in a fast turn-over of patients, while ensuring all admission and discharge teaching is thorough and complete. Provided end of shift report and accurate documentation Student Nurse, North York General Hospital (5N), Toronto, ON Sept., 2015-Dec., 2015 Successfully cared for patients at the short stay surgical unit, provided post-operative care, and health teaching to patients who would be ready for discharge in a short amount of time Taught patients deep breathing exercises, incentive spirometer use, and the importance of ambulation postoperatively. Monitored return of bowel sounds for post abdominal surgery Provided safe medication administration, thorough head to toe assessments, assessed patient labs, developed a plan of care, and documented patient care Exhibited time management skills regarding fast turn-over of patients and prepping patients with appointments and tests scheduled throughout the day Student Nurse, North York General Hospital (5W), Toronto, ON May, 2015-Aug., 2015 Cared for patients at the long term medicine/rehabilitation unit, worked with predominantly geriatric patients, met and exceeded their specific patient needs Provided and documented safe and timely medication administration including administration of narcotics, and monitored any adverse effects Provided and documented vital signs, pain, head to toe assessments, assistance with ADLs, intake and output, wound care, catheter care, colostomy/ileostomy care, G-tube feedings and medications Cared for patients with dementia and mental health issues; provided patients with distraction techniques and therapeutic communication depending on patient needs Student Nurse, Toronto Rehab - E.W. Bickle Centre, Toronto, ON Jan., 2015-Apr., 2015 Worked with patients in the complex continuing care unit and provided essential care to patients who are dealing with complex, long term issues Monitored vital signs, assisted patients with ADLs, provided colostomy and wound care with assistance, and documented patient's status in progress notes and flow charts Provided assistance in repositioning, transferring, and ambulating ADDITIONAL WORK EXPERIENCE Receptionist/Administrative Staff, Company name, Location (2012-2014) Sales Associate/Key Holder, Company name, Location (2010-2012) EDUCATION & TRAINING Diploma: Practical Nursing, Graduated with Honours 2014-2016 Seneca College, King City, Ontario Course: IV Therapy and Phlebotomy Sept., 2016-Present Humber College, Toronto, Ontario BCLS, CPR, and Standard First Aid for HCP Certificates 2015 Canadian Red Cross, Toronto, Ontario Mask Fit Training 2014 Seneca College, King City, Ontario
  10. Ash2016

    RPN, Need help with Resume!

    Hi everyone, I graduated this past summer, and got licensed with the CNO mid august. I'm having a hard time finding my first job as an RPN. I haven't even gotten a call for an interview. Can someone please help me objectively, look at my resume and make edits. I've had others look at it but they aren't nurses so they just say it's fine. I've looked on "how to" sites as well. Still no calls. Are there any keywords I should add to make my resume more scannable? Thank you for your time! I've edited some things for privacy. It didn't past with the correct format with the dates, should be on one line but spaced to the right side of page. Spacing including with the bars are more even in actual doc. First & Last Name, RPN Contact Info HIGHLIGHTS OF QUALIFICATIONS Registered and in good standing with the College of Nurses of Ontario Clinical experience in Toronto area hospitals and in long term care working with geriatric, adult, and pediatric clients Successful completion of full-time consolidation at Sunnybrook Hospital in the postpartum unit, one of the select students chosen for this specialty placement through a competitive application process Computer proficient in MS Word, Adobe, Excel, Power Point, Internet, and Email Excellent interpersonal communication skills, and fluent in English CLINICAL EXPERIENCE Student Nurse, Sunnybrook Hospital, Toronto, ON Jan., 2016-Apr., 2016 Successfully cared for a limit of four pairs in the maternal/newborn unit, able to work autonomously and as a member of the interdisciplinary team Able to assess and assist mother with pain, signs of hemorrhage, fundal check, IV maintenance and removal, urinary output after birth, catheter removal, assessment of incision, side effects of analgesics, and if RhoGAM and/or MMR vaccine is needed Experienced in assessment of neonatal vital signs, daily weights, neonatal bath and physical assessment, neonatal abstinence scoring, jaundice in the infant, initiation of phototherapy; assisted the assessment of neonatal blood sugar for SGA, LGA infants and infants with mothers who have GDM Initiated health teaching for parents, assisted mother in breastfeeding, and provided alternatives such as lactation aid, spoon feeding, and finger feeding as needed Experienced in a fast turn-over of patients, while ensuring all admission and discharge teaching is thorough and complete. Provided end of shift report and accurate documentation Student Nurse, North York General Hospital (5N), Toronto, ON Sept., 2015-Dec., 2015 Successfully cared for patients at the short stay surgical unit, provided post-operative care, and health teaching to patients who would be ready for discharge in a short amount of time Taught patients deep breathing exercises, incentive spirometer use, and the importance of ambulation postoperatively. Monitored return of bowel sounds for post abdominal surgery Provided safe medication administration, thorough head to toe assessments, assessed patient labs, developed a plan of care, and documented patient care Exhibited time management skills regarding fast turn-over of patients and prepping patients with appointments and tests scheduled throughout the day Student Nurse, North York General Hospital (5W), Toronto, ON May, 2015-Aug., 2015 Cared for patients at the long term medicine/rehabilitation unit, worked with predominantly geriatric patients, met and exceeded their specific patient needs Provided and documented safe and timely medication administration including administration of narcotics, and monitored any adverse effects Provided and documented vital signs, pain, head to toe assessments, assistance with ADLs, intake and output, wound care, catheter care, colostomy/ileostomy care, G-tube feedings and medications Cared for patients with dementia and mental health issues; provided patients with distraction techniques and therapeutic communication depending on patient needs Student Nurse, Toronto Rehab - E.W. Bickle Centre, Toronto, ON Jan., 2015-Apr., 2015 Worked with patients in the complex continuing care unit and provided essential care to patients who are dealing with complex, long term issues Monitored vital signs, assisted patients with ADLs, provided colostomy and wound care with assistance, and documented patient's status in progress notes and flow charts Provided assistance in repositioning, transferring, and ambulating ADDITIONAL WORK EXPERIENCE Receptionist/Administrative Staff, Company name, Location (2012-2014) Sales Associate/Key Holder, Company name, Location (2010-2012) EDUCATION & TRAINING Diploma: Practical Nursing, Graduated with Honours 2014-2016 Seneca College, King City, Ontario Course: IV Therapy and Phlebotomy Sept., 2016-Present Humber College, Toronto, Ontario BCLS, CPR, and Standard First Aid for HCP Certificates 2015 Canadian Red Cross, Toronto, Ontario Mask Fit Training 2014 Seneca College, King City, Ontario
  11. nursevickis, My faith in humanity restored by your comment... It seems people on here think a thread about a young nurse's suicide is the perfect place and opportunity to complain about young nurses in general, zero tact.
  12. I wont say much more. I didn't really want a back and forth I just wanted to state my POV but maybe my wording was too aggressive I'm not sure. One last thing, I feel like we should leave this in a positive note, so I have open questions to ALL. Since we are talking about coping skills. What are good coping skills? How do you get them? What does good coping skills mean to you? Most importantly, what do you do to cope? Maybe this will be a more productive conversation rather than focusing on generational differences. Maybe it will help people having a hard time coping who find this thread, and help put things into perspective.
  13. Why do you think I'm speaking in to you or any of you directly like your the bad guys? I'm just trying to have a discussion I don't understand why any of you are taking it as a personal insult, If it's something you already know than good for you... It's seems obvious what I'm saying it's just sometimes people forget the simple things, and again no I'm not talking about any of you directly. "Somebody needs to learn some coping skills" is a passive aggressive statement. Who needs to learn some coping skills?
  14. Ruby Vee "Fourth, you seem to misunderstand workplace relationships. I personally don't know of any experienced nurses who make a practice of being ruthless with new nurses. I have seen an experienced nurse or two be ruthless with new nurses who made mistakes endangering patients which for which the new nurses failed to take responsibility or with new nurses who failed to learn despite multiple efforts to teach. I'm sure that there are a few ruthless experienced nurses out there, but the fact that you claim to be so intimately aquainted with them leads me to believe that perhaps you have had difficulty catching on, taking ownership or accepting responsibility. Fifth, you don't seem to understand that you're not the only generation to have problems. Perhaps millenials have life tougher than Boomers, Gen X or the Great Generation. I doubt it, but let's assume that you are at least partially correct there. Most of us developed coping skills which the millenials seem to lack. Not all millenials, but many, many of them." I don't know where your getting this from, you don't want to assume things about the incident based on the info the OP gave but you have no problem assuming and PROJECTING that i'm "not catching on" based on your own anecdotal experience. Also I have not said once I was personally bullied. I've seen bully type nurses here and there. For ex) a fellow student was yelled at in front of patients and staff for not making the bed as soon as the staff nurse told her to, she took a couple minutes to finish up documenting instead of jumping when the nurse said jump. It was embarrassing to watch. There is potential for power struggles and bullying in nursing, how can you deny that with all the complaints and posts on this website? Not all of them are minor. However this DOESN'T mean I'm saying ALL people on here are bullies... how would I know that? Why would you take it personal that I would want to address bullying though? Especially in a thread that mentioned it in the OP? Also never said the majority of my interactions were negative... I just believe in being an advocate. I never mentioned the Great Gen. Lastly there seems to be a lot of prejudice about millennials or in other words the young people on here. I'm out.
  15. sevensonnets - I'm confused as to who needs to learn coping skills? The girl who killed herself? If your referring to me I'm just trying to address potential life stressors she could have been going through to make sense of it, I'm trying to explain that she maybe she didn't just end her life because she was a millennial and could not cope because she was coddled too much, as some of you are assuming. People don't seem to want to have an open and productive discussion but instead make it too personal. I said nothing of my ability to cope or not cope, don't assume. Anyway is their anyone who works in the mental health field that can address this?? I feel some of the people on here are just going to continue to argue with me because I'm somehow offending people by saying we should be nicer to others and trying to explain a millennial/new nurse POV...
  16. Saying something is harder does not make the thing i'm comparing it to easy, Just harder... economically in a lot of ways it is right now, generally speaking outside of anecdotal personal experience. There is a lot of stats online about this very topic. Ruby Vee - How was she triggered? Because that's what the OP insinuated, the OP said she was bullied, she quit, and shortly after ended her life. Is it surprising bullying caused someone to end their life? or at least was a catalyst? It happens. The OP even said it was the worst bullying they've seen, so it probably wasn't "just a dirty look." Anyways why is me saying something like be a kinder human being to others something that needs to be argued? I'm just take people should consider the power of their words, and that no one knows what someone is going through in any circumstance or environment. Like for an example if someone is a raging jerk to a teen employee at the local grocery store, how do they know the teen wasn't on the brink of suicide? and they, the customer triggered a heavier emotional response because of what was bubbling under the surface? Is that customer criminally responsible for the death? Of course not. Are they a crappy human being? Yes. I mean I'm trying to explain a persons potential fragile state of mind. Am I saying oh "handle people with kid gloves" like many of the people on here are likely to argue? No I'm saying be decent, maybe even nice? If someone feels a new nurse isn't doing the right thing there's probably a more professional way of addressing it rather than belittling them.
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