There are several reasons I chose to pursue nursing. I wanted to enter the medical field, and I didn't want the risk of going for med school at my age. 26 when I started back to college. I wanted a career path where I could go back to school at anytime to self actualize. As I learned about nursing LPN programs, ADN, BSN, MSN, and DNP programs I realized it was perfect for me. The many ways to advance my education, and career the more I thought it was perfect. Most importantly I wanted to be on the front lines of the medical field, and nurses are exactly that the front lines.
I could break my education into chunks. I could do LPN, and contribute to the medical field. I could become a CNA, and get tuition reimbursement on some level. I could do amazing things pursuing nursing on any level, and most importantly I wouldn't have to stop. I could continue to self actualize every step of my life. The more I learn about science, mathematics, and the future/ specializations nursing offers the more I fall in love with everything that goes along with it. Well maybe except humanities, I want more math and science.
I could do LPN, and then LPN to BSN. I could do ADN, and then get a MSN. I could go for a BSN. I could take my time. Get my finances in order. Work then go back to school. Work while in school. All I had to do was give it everything I had. I have loved every moment. The thought of being denied the ability to further my education is the most abhorrent thought I could imagine, but it is always in the back of my mind.
I have fallen in love with A and P, Microbiology, algebra, statistics, Gen Chem, and more. I love what I am doing. Part of me wishes I could just sit in a classroom forever, and just learn. Another part of me is so eager to put what I am learning to practice now. I have to remind myself patience is a virtue.
I know with nursing the sky is the limit (not monetarily, but self actualizing). I can take my education all the way with a DNP program. Way down the road, and honestly I would be grateful to hold any nursing degree, I am a CNA, and I take great pride in starting from the "bottom".
I want more, so much more. I want the knowledge. I have an insatiable desire for it. My goal when I started was to shoot to a MSN as fast as I could. I now realize what an incredible disservice I was doing myself, and the education system. I am now learning the basis for so much to come (I hope), I apply to LPN, ADN, and BSN programs in the fall, and I am so much closer than I even thought myself capable of in the fall.
I have learned so much in such a short period of time, and it has left me wanting more. Everything the field I have chosen to pursue has to offer. I want to learn solve problems. I want the knowledge, I want to apply what I am learning.
I have so much to learn about all of this, but every step leaves me wanting more. I cannot imagine me doing anything, but science/ applied science. That is what nursing is to me, and that is why I want it so badly.
The real difference I could make in my own life, and the lives of others. It means absolutely everything to me. It is quite personal for me. I have experienced disease more than I would care to.
The old adage I wouldn't want any of you as my nurses, because I would just as soon not have fallen ill applies to me, but the fact remains I did fall ill. I cannot say I am necessarily grateful to have become ill, but I am glad it lead me here. I would never have considered nursing before I fell ill with a chronic illness, and a lung abscess.
Now I wonder what in God's name was wrong with me. Why was I not doing this seven years ago. Where could I be today at 27 if I had started seven years ago?
I cannot quantify what science, and medicine has done for me. More than just twice saving my life. It has given me a life to pursue. Something to strive for. Something to stand in awe of. The miraculous power of nature, and modern medicine. I am a living testimony to both, and I am deeply grateful to be here.
My life was defined by bitter disappointment, and regret. Letting life's hurdles such as illness get the best of me. Of giving up, of settling for less. Once I decided to puruse something incredibly difficult that was nursing I sprang out of bed each day before class.
What pursuing nursing has done for me remains the best decision I ever made regardless if I ever pass the nclex. The pursuit of knowledge that I have found in my classes even in pre-nursing, and in my CNA course has made me a much better person. I can say with pride, I am a CNA, I am striving to go further, and I love life.