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Define yourself, because its you who has to look in the mirror. -me

honeyforasalteyfish's Latest Activity

  1. Also if I may submit this to you. I have been down dark roads where I did quit, and others times where I didn't. I always hated when people told me everything would be ok. Because I knew that it was a cop out white lie, but it was given in the hopes however small it might help. If you are looking for a reason to hang on this is all I can honestly say. Terrible things happen to good people for no reason, but good things also happen for no apparent reason. There is always a chance you might get an unexpected boon in your life. They tend to come more frequently to those who don't quit. Because when it happens they are more ready for it, and they can latch on and not let go. That is just my opinion. I am sorry I can't offer you more than that.
  2. Well, I am sorry you are in such a rough spot. I am twenty eight, so I am not the best person for advice. First though you should congratulate yourself on getting into a nursing program with such difficulties. That could not have been easy. You must be a woman of incredible capabilities just to be there. My advice is meet with your proffesor when you can. They have often been there, and if you explain your situation they will likely give you much better advice than I can. Especially about how, what, and when to study. I am sorry for your husband.
  3. There are several reasons I chose to pursue nursing. I wanted to enter the medical field, and I didn't want the risk of going for med school at my age. 26 when I started back to college. I wanted a career path where I could go back to school at anytime to self actualize. As I learned about nursing LPN programs, ADN, BSN, MSN, and DNP programs I realized it was perfect for me. The many ways to advance my education, and career the more I thought it was perfect. Most importantly I wanted to be on the front lines of the medical field, and nurses are exactly that the front lines. I could break my education into chunks. I could do LPN, and contribute to the medical field. I could become a CNA, and get tuition reimbursement on some level. I could do amazing things pursuing nursing on any level, and most importantly I wouldn't have to stop. I could continue to self actualize every step of my life. The more I learn about science, mathematics, and the future/ specializations nursing offers the more I fall in love with everything that goes along with it. Well maybe except humanities, I want more math and science. I could do LPN, and then LPN to BSN. I could do ADN, and then get a MSN. I could go for a BSN. I could take my time. Get my finances in order. Work then go back to school. Work while in school. All I had to do was give it everything I had. I have loved every moment. The thought of being denied the ability to further my education is the most abhorrent thought I could imagine, but it is always in the back of my mind. I have fallen in love with A and P, Microbiology, algebra, statistics, Gen Chem, and more. I love what I am doing. Part of me wishes I could just sit in a classroom forever, and just learn. Another part of me is so eager to put what I am learning to practice now. I have to remind myself patience is a virtue. I know with nursing the sky is the limit (not monetarily, but self actualizing). I can take my education all the way with a DNP program. Way down the road, and honestly I would be grateful to hold any nursing degree, I am a CNA, and I take great pride in starting from the "bottom". I want more, so much more. I want the knowledge. I have an insatiable desire for it. My goal when I started was to shoot to a MSN as fast as I could. I now realize what an incredible disservice I was doing myself, and the education system. I am now learning the basis for so much to come (I hope), I apply to LPN, ADN, and BSN programs in the fall, and I am so much closer than I even thought myself capable of in the fall. I have learned so much in such a short period of time, and it has left me wanting more. Everything the field I have chosen to pursue has to offer. I want to learn solve problems. I want the knowledge, I want to apply what I am learning. I have so much to learn about all of this, but every step leaves me wanting more. I cannot imagine me doing anything, but science/ applied science. That is what nursing is to me, and that is why I want it so badly. The real difference I could make in my own life, and the lives of others. It means absolutely everything to me. It is quite personal for me. I have experienced disease more than I would care to. The old adage I wouldn't want any of you as my nurses, because I would just as soon not have fallen ill applies to me, but the fact remains I did fall ill. I cannot say I am necessarily grateful to have become ill, but I am glad it lead me here. I would never have considered nursing before I fell ill with a chronic illness, and a lung abscess. Now I wonder what in God's name was wrong with me. Why was I not doing this seven years ago. Where could I be today at 27 if I had started seven years ago? I cannot quantify what science, and medicine has done for me. More than just twice saving my life. It has given me a life to pursue. Something to strive for. Something to stand in awe of. The miraculous power of nature, and modern medicine. I am a living testimony to both, and I am deeply grateful to be here. My life was defined by bitter disappointment, and regret. Letting life's hurdles such as illness get the best of me. Of giving up, of settling for less. Once I decided to puruse something incredibly difficult that was nursing I sprang out of bed each day before class. What pursuing nursing has done for me remains the best decision I ever made regardless if I ever pass the nclex. The pursuit of knowledge that I have found in my classes even in pre-nursing, and in my CNA course has made me a much better person. I can say with pride, I am a CNA, I am striving to go further, and I love life.
  4. honeyforasalteyfish

    Nobody Cares About Our Feelings When it's Time to Perform

    A very true article. I have experienced this myself in other lines of work. Lesson learned. I don't really like it, but I cannot deny its truth. There is an old baseball analogy that I think applies to this article. "What have you done for me lately."
  5. That is what my CC is doing quite frustrating really. I intend to start work as a CNA this summer, but I am loathe to give up my tutoring job, and I can't exactly work two jobs and get the kind of marks I need to actually be competitive. Still I don't want to close doors so I will be applying to my CCs program in the fall when I am ready to apply along with BSN programs, and LPN. I intend on doing it anyway I am allowed, but shooting for BSN despite having to overcome a few problems of my own.
  6. honeyforasalteyfish

    The Best Piece of Advice I Was Ever Given

    Thank you my crohn's is in remission. The medical staff that treat me are excellent. Made me aspire to become what I am trying to become. The hardest battle right now is juggling time, and finances. Still I seem to be doing ok, and a BSN right before 30 would make me happy. :)
  7. Its prerequisites for nursing programs. Classes usually include microbiology, anatomy, and general chemistry. Not everyone is accepted to a nursing program straight out of highschool. For those that aren't, and want to be a nurse they may take pre-nursing classes. Upon comepleting required classes, and certain other variable criteria they may then apply to a nursing program. For instance there are actually nursing programs that offer only the last two years, before applying you must have completed the first two years of your BSN. Others will accept students straight out of highschool, all have variable criteria, and requirements. Most include Micro, gen chem, Anatomy, and statistics, as well as various other courses. There are a myriad of ways to becoming a nurse. One may become a LPN, get their ADN, or a BSN. There are Also MSN programs for non RN with Bachelors, or better. Then there are ways to continue your education. For instance one may start out as an LPN, then either complete a LPN to ADN bridge program, then complete a ADN to BSN bridge program if they wish to go further. There are also LPN to BSN programs, and yes ADN to MSN programs. There are also accelerated BSN programs for those who already hold a bachelors. In my case I will be completing an AS, associate studies science, in the natural sciences this summer, then applying to LPN, ADN, and BSN programs. I will be eligible for all three, and fully intend on applying to all three. If I where say accepted to a BSN program in two years I would hold a BSN, if ADN then in two years I would hold an ADN, and then intend to bridge it via an online course. If I were accepted to LPN I would be an LPN in a year, and I could bridge to an ADN, or BSN. Right now I am hoping to go straight for the BSN, more money, but saves me time on my education because the BSN was always the intention. Starting taking prerequisites at CC makes me less comepetive for some programs, and indeed makes me ineligible for a few who want all undergrad worked completed at some said university, however I become eligible for certain other programs that require you have an associates, and prerequistes completed before even applying to take nursing courses, and complete a BSN in two years after receiving your associates.
  8. honeyforasalteyfish

    2/13/16 What I Learned This Week: Discipline is King

    I learned when you are disappointed by an outcome, you can work harder, or smarter. However I decided to attempt both. I also learned not to let personal grudges get in the way of studying, or sleep cycles. I put in close to 50 hours of studying for my gen chem, micro, and A and P exam. Only to score an 87.5, 91.5, and an 87.5. Dissapointing, but hardly the death knell for a difficult semester. I felt like I achieved the bare minimum of what I needed to do on my exams, now is the time to re-evaluate where I went wrong. Block out distractions, and recommit myself to what improvement I am capable of making rather than feeling sorry for myself.
  9. honeyforasalteyfish

    The Best Piece of Advice I Was Ever Given

    I suffer from Crohn's disease. Its why I want to be a nurse. When I was 18/19 I was accepted to a state university. I flunked out, because I was bleeding internally, and lost 60 pounds instead of taking a medical leave of absence. Later on I developed depression, and it turned into ideas of reference that ruined what happiness I had found in my life. I have found the depression much harder to deal with than the crohn's despite on paper being much easier to treat. For years it wrecked my life unchallenged. I will not be defined by my "conditions" I have found higher education, and treatment of my depression has done miracles for my psyche all I ask for is a chance to complete my education before it is to late. I have lost a lot of friends because of it, burned bridges, and bitter feelings left in the wake. I find I don't care. Because for once in my life the ball's in my court, I define my own future, not what other people perceive me to be based off my past. How could they possibly understand. I tried committing suicide three times, I made up this nonsense about going to Ireland, but really what I had just done was try to kill myself. I was expecting to die. I take a risk posting this, because of my ambitions, I find I no longer care, I will not be defined by my past. I enjoy the present for the first time in my life. I want to break that stigma. I don't want to hide from my past I want it defeated. I want to be better, stronger than I was, better than I ever imagined I could be when I thought my loved ones would be better off with me dead. My future is for me to decide, and no one else. Any one who says otherwise is no friend of mine. I want to be a nurse practitioner someday, and I find all my bridges between former friends are burnt. You know what that is ok, they are my past, my future is education. My future is in bettering myself every step of the way. I will succeed, because after all I have been through nothing less is acceptable to me. I will achieve my goals, or die trying (figuratively speaking of course). I risked my life to take my finals only a year ago. I was told I could die if I took my finals, you know what the difference between my 19 year old self, and my 26 year old self? I thought it worth the risk, I know what I would do with the last days of my life, and that is go to school, work for my education. I will succeed one way, or another, nothing can stop me now, but me. I have finnally between the demon that is depression to a utter unrecognizable pulp. I can look at myself in the mirror again, and I find I like the feeling. I got better, when I was told I might not make it, I have never wanted anything so badly in my life. My biggest fear is my depression, and the mental instability it caused me for two reasons. I never want to go back to that wreck I was, and I fear it has cost me my future. That is when a poster on AN gave me the best advice I have ever been given, and while I forget her username I cherish the advice. Stop acting like these things are holding you back, you define your future. So I am trying to define my future. Because that is what I wanted most desperately to defined my own future.
  10. My ten tips for dealing with pre-nursing classes (as I have experienced it.) 1. Shoot high Early. My first semester back I took all math, and science. it was an experiment for me to see if I was even capable of the work. I shot for a 4.0 at midterm I had it, and ended up with two bs instead of my 4.0. I came down with a lung abscess, and could have died. If I hadn't worked so hard early on I would not have passed, much less done well enough to justify the money I spent. 2. Results not excuses. Excuses won't get you through pre-nursing I have plenty. Clinical depression, Chron's disease, and I had an 11cm lung abscess. Then I heard a story about a man with cancer, who would go to chemo, and still go to nursing school. That man earned his right for a seat in nursing school, and it was his right to attend. I lamented my fate, but I learned some people walked harder roads than me, so it was a wake up call for me. 3. Wake up calls. I bombed my first quiz in statistics 36% I spent the entire week studying, and got a 96% on the exam. Take your wake up calls early, and let it give you a sense of urgency. We all make mistakes, work to rectify them early before they snowball. 4. If you are in a hole start climbing. I started back with a 2.55 cumulative. Its at 3.235 its still not very competitive. I could blame my crohn's disease, but it won't get me into nursing school. You know what might graduating with my associate studies science with a 3.5 which is what I have the opportunity to do. 5. 4 Brings me to my next point, Look at each semester as an opportunity. Every semester brings the opportunity to improve yourself. My GPA is steadily climbing each semester, and I love the ride. 6. Remember why you are taking these classes I am a tutor, so I see this all the time when I tutor, and I imagine its the same with nursing school. They are trying to groom you for the rigors of the next class, and in turn your education is trying to groom you for whatever you are going for. So remember why you are learning what you are learning, its not busy work, its so you have a chance at achieving a level of educational, and professional success that takes years of work. 7. Get ahead early. Its so much easier on you if you get ahead early, you can relax, and get 8 hours of sleep instead of cramming. So if you have the opportunity to do something a week in advance do it. 8. Take a CNA course. I know a lot of people turn their noses up at this one, and its not really necessary. However My CNA course taught me a basis for many classes to come, and critical thinking skills that I would need to succeed in classes like anatomy. Also before you drop 60 grand on your education a CNA course will give you a taste of what its like to care for a person who cannot care for themselves, and its a great way to make excellent contacts with professors who can teach you amazing things about the medical field, and students who also have similar goals and stories. 9. Enjoy the ride. Remember you have a goal, but try to enjoy each semester of material it makes it so much easier when you don't fear going to class to learn each day. Try to develop a mindset "todays going to be a good one." You might be surprised how good your day is. 10. Gauge yourself early, and adjust. If you are struggling with something that is going to be on a test, be aware of it, and prepare accordingly. I was very diligent in learning nomenclature in chemistry because it was something I struggled with. So I paid extra attention in class when it came up, and I am seeing tutors to review the material. Identify your strengths don't neglect them, but focus extra time on your weaknesses. I hope this helps I apply to nursing programs this fall wish me luck! I have been at pre-nursing about a year. P.S. Apply to multiple schools!!! Nursing is competitive so apply to as many schools as you are eligible within your area. I will be applying to over half a dozen in the fall.
  11. honeyforasalteyfish

    Skilled Connections...the Heart of Nursing

    While I am not a nurse yet. I think patient support is very important. I have been a patient continue to be a patient, and the support of nurses has inspired me to get my own life in order. While I would rather never ever see them because it means I am as healthy as a horse, that has unfortunately not been my situation. I am thankful I have had healthcare professionals good at what they do. Both professionally, and from an emotional standpoint. This is not my proudest moment, but when I had a lung abscess I threw a little tantrum. I had just gone back to school with the goal of becoming a RN. I was oh so close to a 4.0 while working 30 hours a week. As you can imagine ending up in the hospital with a lung abscess did not please me. I felt like my life was slipping away. It was the entire healthcare team who was there for me, and listened to me blab about how much I admired them, and wanted to be a RN, While simultaneously bragging about how close to a 4.0 I was, and complaining the entire time that my grades where slipping away from me. I ended up with two Bs, but given my situation things worked out well. If I am ever fortunate enough to become a RN my experiences as a patient are something I will never forget. I hope I never forget the reason I am here today, and who tolerated my BS when I was down, out, and desperate the entire healthcare team. I took thank you cards to all of them for their services, small consolation for dealing with a mulehead like me, but it is what I could offer.