No Stars In My Eyes

Med nurse in med-surg., float, HH, and PDN

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All Content by No Stars In My Eyes

  1. No Stars In My Eyes

    Funny things patients say !

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to TAM's topic in Nursing Humor

    Call me crazy, but I swear in the back of my brain is a vague memory that they DID make choc.
  2. No Stars In My Eyes

    Funniest/strangest dementia patient stories

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to Angie O'Plasty's topic in Nursing Humor

    Bears don't have thumbs?......Had a similar problem with a patient and snakes; Someone saw a rather long shed snakeskin in her basement; she wouldn't be convinced it was a good thing, since it was a...
  3. No Stars In My Eyes

    Funny things patients say !

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to TAM's topic in Nursing Humor

    JeneratorRN: Don't feel embarassed about what you said to the quad-pt......Myfirst nursing job was at MGH in Boston, on the fresh spinal-cord floor, with the doctor who was pionneering the HALO-frame....
  4. No Stars In My Eyes

    Favorite Dr or Nurse Name

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to sethmctenn's topic in Nursing Humor

    Somewhere I've got a list I've been collecting, I'll have to dig it out! Several, off the top of my head: a dentist : Dr. Jabs....and, a doc who got caught giving out toooooomany narc scripts : Dr....
  5. No Stars In My Eyes

    Funny things you have said but wish you didn't

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to FranEMTnurse's topic in Nursing Humor

    Before we got married, I stopped by my boyfriends house on the way home after doing errands. As I walked into his apt. I said "I can't stay long; I have a bagful of cars outside" When I come home now...
  6. No Stars In My Eyes

    What's your nursing kryptonite?

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to ktliz's topic in General Nursing

    LIAN : yes, yes, yes! I'm with you on that one. I worked a locked dementia ward where the patients followed me and the med cart like seagulls around a fishing trawler. One lady was always trying to...
  7. No Stars In My Eyes

    Funny things you have said but wish you didn't

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to FranEMTnurse's topic in Nursing Humor

    OMG, I just looked up at the clock and realized I've been reading the posts on this thread for two hours! No wonder I have blurred vision; I've been laughing and wiping tears from my eyes all that...
  8. No Stars In My Eyes

    Your Favorite one liner used with patients

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to scaredofshots's topic in Nursing Humor

    To a real irritable 90+ y.o. guy who gave everyone a difficult time, being especially uncooperative when receiving personak care, When he balled up his fist and growled at me "give me a rock and I'll...
  9. No Stars In My Eyes

    Warning Nurses! Holding It All In Can Kill You!

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to Nurse_Advocate's topic in Health, Stress Management

    I, too, am fairly a-social during my time off. I feel like Liddle Noodnik said, I have to spend 12 hours a day focused on everybody elses needs, anticipating, observing; it wears me out and it...
  10. No Stars In My Eyes

    Funny things patients say !

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to TAM's topic in Nursing Humor

    . Just thought of another one! I was doing private-duty with a 97 year old guy who loved to go out riding in the car. We would take particular interest in personalized license plates . I pointed out...
  11. No Stars In My Eyes

    Funny things patients say !

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to TAM's topic in Nursing Humor

    This isn't from a patient, but from her 5 yr. old grandson. I was making a home-health visit to change the dressing of this womans large, open post-hysterectomy wound. As I was removing the previous...
  12. No Stars In My Eyes

    What does your username mean?

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to LifesAJourney's topic in Nursing Humor

    My user name is pretty self-explanatory, but it doesn't mean I'm world-weary, it just means I've been around a
  13. No Stars In My Eyes

    What's your nursing kryptonite?

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to ktliz's topic in General Nursing

    Spit, saliva. I hate having to stand there with the kidney-basin waiting for the patient to rinse + spit after brushing their teeth. When I was little, my older sister used to come into the bathroom...
  14. No Stars In My Eyes

    Your Favorite one liner used with patients

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to scaredofshots's topic in Nursing Humor

    All of us have had that male patient with wandering hands. I say, pointing to my elbow: "You see that elbow?" (they say "yeah....) "Well, anything from that elbow to my fingertips, you can touch....
  15. No Stars In My Eyes

    NCBON: Is this an Invasion of privacy ?

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to Got2B's topic in Nurses Recovery

    One facility I worked in used what I call a "spit test" for drug screening; You put a piece of cotton in your mouth, under your tongue (it's like what the dentist uses) and when it's saturated you put...
  16. No Stars In My Eyes

    Funniest/strangest dementia patient stories

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to Angie O'Plasty's topic in Nursing Humor

    So, this is an anecdote I never could send in to Reader's Digest: I'm working in small hospital, and after a football game one of the rooms in my assignment on 3-11 was a four bed room with three...
  17. No Stars In My Eyes

    BSN/ RN New Grad Prospects in Asheville (& Surrounding Areas)?

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to red.tm's topic in North Carolina Nursing

    I guess it all depends on what you're looking for, but personally, I think the job situation here sucks. This is a nice city, but the job market's a real
  18. No Stars In My Eyes

    Funniest/strangest dementia patient stories

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to Angie O'Plasty's topic in Nursing Humor

    I had a psychotic pt. once,( mostly controlled by meds.)....I decided it would be nice to compliment her on her decoupage purse ; she replied, "Why, thank you; it used to be a baby's head."...
  19. No Stars In My Eyes

    anxious nursing student

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to nursing.mypassion's topic in Emergency

    :redbeathe Everybody's a "newbie" more than once in their lives. I was a newbie at a job situation recently, even after being a nurse for 35 years! I just hadn't done this particular type/service...
  20. No Stars In My Eyes

    Why Don't Companies Care About Their Patients/Residents??

    No Stars In My Eyes replied to westieluv's topic in Geriatric, LTC

    westieluv- What you are going through is an "ethical dilemma". I know this because I was in a similar situation, pushing pills for twelve hours, on my feet for the whole shift and wondering how on...