I'm a new grad working in a level 1 trauma ICU. Everyday before I go to work-even several days before work, I get anxiety attacks and almost throw up from how nervous I am anticipating what kind of a night it's going to be. I guess what I portray on the outside does not depict this because it seems the unit trusts me enough to handle complicated-ish patients. It's 100% TMI-but since we are nurses, what the heck, but I can not remember te last time I had a solid BM-my anxiety about this job is THAT overwhelming. It's not only Thr patho, but the drugs, the interventions, the paperwork the protocols, who to page, what neurosurgeon/trauma doctor likes what and who's going to rip me a new one today over something? Can't complain about the people I work with-most are very helpful-all I have to do is shout I need assistance. But then there is person x who criticizes everything I do, don't do, say, think, etc-you get the point. This job is not easy-I think about quiting everyday-fantasizing over it almost. I have to be my own therapist just to work up the nerve to walk onto the damn unit. Our educator says this is normal-and that at 6 months it should go away. I wish 6 months was here tomorrow. It's really disheartening because I've always wanted to bra nurse-I love helping others and Helping them feel better-now I barely get the feeling I've even charted everything each shift-let alone improved my patients outcome.Love this thread because it makes me feel less alone-I find comfort in knowing others out there are feeling the same way I am.